Jokes about animals

One day, a kangaroo was driving along a country road when he suddenly saw a white rabbit on the side of the road, with almost broken ears and body.

Everything on the ground seems to be listening to something. ...

So .. Kangaroo stopped the car and asked curiously, "What are you listening to, Little White Rabbit?"

"A big truck passed here half an hour ago ..."

"Wow .. so God! .. how do you know? .."

"He XX! That's how my neck and legs are broken .. "

Three white rabbits picked a mushroom.

The two big ones let the small one get some wild vegetables to eat together.

The younger one said I wouldn't go. If I leave, you will eat my mushrooms.

The two older ones said no and went ~ ~ ~

Half a year has passed, and the white rabbit hasn't come back yet. The big one can't come back. Let's eat.

The other big one said wait ~ ~ ~

A year has passed and the white rabbit hasn't come back yet. Don't wait for us to eat.

Just then, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out of the nearby jungle and said angrily, Look! I knew you would eat me.

mushroom

Three mosquitoes in the Three Kingdoms are showing off their flying skills. They have been farting for a long time and quarreling for a long time, and they can't tell the winner from the loser, so they decided to "show off" each other.

The British mosquito attacked for the first time and saw it fly to a frog and turn around it several times. When it came back, it saw the frog's tongue tied a slipknot, and it proudly said, I'll tell you! In my hometown, if you don't have this ability, you will soon be finished!

American mosquito sneered twice: Hum! Carving worms, not to mention! ! So he flew to the two frogs and ran back and forth between them several times. When he came back, the tongues of two frogs formed a fast knot. He said, humph! In my hometown, you have to live like this!

China Mosquito replied disdainfully: Just kidding! In our hometown, we have never seen such bad technology! British and American mosquitoes said unconvinced, you said this! ? How capable do you think you are? So China mosquitoes flew to a group of frogs and shuttled among them several times. When they came back, they saw the frog's tongue locked together and became a "Chinese knot". ...

The cause of the accident

There was a serious accident on the expressway. A car crashed into a lamppost, and both men and women in the car were seriously injured and unconscious. When the police were investigating at the scene, a monkey jumped out of the bushes by the road. The police officer at the scene saw the monkey wearing a collar and thought it might be a human pet, so he asked it, "Are you also a passenger in the car?"

The monkey actually nodded, as if it were human. The policeman tried to ask again, "What were the people in the car doing when the accident happened?"

The monkey put two fingers on his mouth.

"Are they smoking?" The police officer guessed.

The monkey nodded his head.

The police officer then asked, "What else did they do?"

The monkey clenched his fist in one hand and pretended to pour something into his mouth.

"You mean they are drinking?"

The monkey nodded.

"What else?"

The monkey pursed his mouth and kissed the back of his hand hard.

"Oh, are they making out?"

The monkey also nodded.

The police officer read aloud: "When the accident happened, the passengers were smoking, drinking and having intimate activities in the car ..." Write everything down in the notebook. Finally he asked the monkey, "What are you doing?"

The monkey reached out his hands and made a gesture of holding the steering wheel.