100000 ancient and modern jokes

The following are100000 ancient and modern jokes that I recommend to you. I hope you like them.

The cat chased the mouse

A cat caught a mouse, and the mouse was forced to hide in a bamboo sedan chair. The cat sighed, Look at you, you will do well in the exam. How do you spend these festivals?

Scholar spirit

The host asked Mr. Yue: Why don't you understand the book? The teacher said: Brothers know each other. I don't say it in my chest, and the devil takes the hindmost! Ask again: since you can't talk, should you sit still? Answer: I have to leave because my family is short of money.

Master Yun: In that case, why must we see that the supply is slightly indifferent? Mr. Wang resolutely changed color and said, this spirit is gone, and he still looks like a gentleman!

Water his wife and concubine.

A librarian was hired, and the study was near the inner room. For example, if you read the wrong sentence at four o'clock, pay attention to it: wrong or overlapping. Hearing this, the master's mother was alert to her intention to play tricks and sue the master. The master couldn't read the book, so he was angry and wanted to drive it away.

The teacher said: The book is too meaningful for you to understand. What crime have I committed? So I moved the museum to the lobby building to avoid it.

One day, the master's wife and concubine were swimming downstairs, and the teacher wanted to pee, so she drowned it from the wall. Unintentionally fell on the head of the wife and concubine, telling the master. Mainly because Meng Lang blamed him last time. This time, it is necessary to verify what is published in the book. Read it from left to right, and suddenly realize, say, here it is, or you almost made a mistake. Q: What is the voucher? The Lord said: I am arrogant to my wives and concubines.

teaching method

The master blamed the teacher for not teaching well. The teacher said, Do you want me to die with your son?

The master was puzzled. The teacher said, I have used up all my teaching methods, but unless I have to go into your son's stomach, I will suffocate him and your son will swell him to death.

Zhongjiu

A teacher taught, and his disciples asked: What do you mean by the way of university? The teacher pretended to be drunk and said, you will ask me only when you are drunk. Give it to your wife, and her wife said: University? Is it the title? Way? This is the truth in the book. Learn from others.

Tomorrow he said, "Your generation is ignorant, so you came to ask me when you were drunk yesterday." . I woke up today, not to ask. Why? What did you ask yesterday? Yes, on the way to college. The teacher talks like a wife. Disciple asked again:? In mingde? How's it going? The teacher then raised his forehead and said, you stay, I'm still drinking here.

Play and read to the left

Those who were trained taught "University" first, but before the performance, Wang didn't forget that sentence, so he read it out like a word. The Lord said: wrong, so you should read it. Learn from it. In winter, I read the notes in The Analects of Confucius. Although it is ancient and modern, it is read as the host, saying that it is wrong again, which is also in the play. The normal university was angry and complained to his friends, saying that it was hard for the owner to ignore it. In the play? Two words, from the beginning of the year to the end of the year.

Chibifu

Ordinary teachers are used to reading other words. One night, I talked to my disciples about two poems before and after Chibi, and actually read the word Fu as a thief. There was a thief lurking outside the window, and the teacher read aloud in front of me: "Red Wall Thief".

The thief was startled because he thought of the past and felt it, but he didn't go through the back of the house. It was late at night. After the teacher finished speaking, he went to bed in the back room. When I was sleeping, I talked to my disciples about the later "Red Cliff Fu", and I also studied as before. The thief sighed outside and said, I went back and forth to hide and was caught by this man. People have hired such a gentleman, and you don't even have to keep a dog!

Back beam repair

A teacher has little knowledge and is good at reading other words. If the master doesn't like it, ask the teacher. Every time he reads a different word, he will be fined one point. By the end of the year, when the refund is used up, the remaining 30 cents will be sealed and sent out.

The teacher was angry and said, what's the point? What's the point? Master said: now deduct two points and save one point. Master and mother are beside: you can be happy for one year and get half of it. Mr. Wang recently made a statement of thanks: Madam, what you don't say means everything. Master said: Even this point has been collected cleanly.

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