Daily joke: the golden house hides the charming.

My friend Xiao Yu, Gao Feisheng graduated from Tsinghua and has been single for a long time. Before going on a blind date that day, the introducer repeatedly told me, "When you meet a girl for the first time, don't talk endlessly about your ex." Xiaoyu is puzzled: "I know the meaning of twittering, but what is the predecessor?"

2, the golden house is hidden.

Invite female colleagues to the party today.

I said: there is a party tonight, and many single handsome guys are coming.

She said, no.

I said, this is not your style. Why did you take off the bill?

She replied shyly: the golden house hides the charming!

3. What's wrong with the world?

The young man asked the master, "I helped an old man yesterday and was wrongly charged 2000 yuan." I lost 1500 while driving this morning. What's wrong with the world? " The master took a cup for the young man to hold in his hand, and then began to pour boiling water. When the water overflowed, the cup crashed to the ground and broke into pieces. The young man suddenly realized, "Does the master mean that you will understand only after suffering?" The master shook his head and said, "No, this cup belongs to the Qianlong period. Just pay 30 thousand yuan. "

Step 4 run in the morning

Running this morning, I saw the two sisters in front of me and felt that I couldn't run. I plucked up the courage to strike up a conversation with him: "Hey, why doesn't the beauty run?" Beauty: "I'm tired, I can't run." I touched her breasts and ran away. I thought I couldn't run. . .

5. Buy condoms by accident

My boyfriend will come back tomorrow, and I'm a little excited. I just bought TT, met my girlfriend and bought TT. I jokingly asked her: Do you have a boyfriend? She blushed and told me: Yes. I asked her with a smile: What model do you need? She said, just like you, I will buy whatever you buy. Then I took two boxes, and finally she scrambled to pay the bill.

6. Toys that you accompany me

I went to her boudoir with my girlfriend yesterday, and I was hungry at noon. Two young ladies are playing games in the house and let me cook for them. So I took everything out of her refrigerator and made a cucumber, a bitter gourd fried meat, a braised eggplant and a shredded banana. At dinner, she stared at me with red eyes, as if to skin me alive.

7. Three-person couple package

Tonight, my sister and brother-in-law and I went to see Speed and furious 7. When buying popcorn, the waiter introduced the couple set meal, two cokes and popcorn. Brother-in-law directly asked about the set meal for three couples. . Can the waiter pop up the family package for a long time?

8. What should I do if I meet a girl I like?

I saw a girl at dinner, just my type, and I was thinking about how to go over and strike up a conversation. That sister actually started to go out after dinner. I haven't decided yet and I'm at a loss. When she passed me, I couldn't help sticking out my foot ... and then we left each other our phone numbers. ...

9. It premieres at 0 and 7 o'clock tonight.

The premiere will be held at 0 o'clock tonight. If someone asks you out, don't go, because it will be 3 am after the movie. His purpose is to take you to Super 7 and then to Super 8.

10, daily

Every day, I look at that delicate red face, look deeply into her eyes and say to her, "You are so beautiful! I think I am the happiest person in the world! " Husband: "It's not so melodramatic to put on makeup in front of the mirror!" " "