Inspire interesting jokes

Life is full of fun. If you live, you have to find your own funny jokes. You can use them among friends, family or partners, and you can also ease the atmosphere. Next, I carefully prepared a "funny joke" for you. Welcome to watch!

Inspiring funny jokes (hot articles)

1. Last night, Romney felt that victory was in sight and confidently said to his wife:? You can sleep with the president of the United States tomorrow night. ? Just now, the election results were announced on TV: Obama won. The wife said excitedly:? Should I invite Obama to our home or go to see him? ! !

Give me 2.4 billion dollars. How did you spend it? A: My life is cheap, so I love being a security guard. When I have money, I can buy a big company and let others run it. I work as a security guard on time every day (@ yuppie first hero).

3. Objectively analyze why Ling Huchong should choose the younger one instead of Ren Yingying in the legendary swordsman. Yue Lingshan: He can do martial arts, cook and be a woman. He has a good reputation and a high reputation. Ren Yingying: I can play. As long as it is a man, you should choose Ren Yingying!

4. When couples are together, even if boys tell dirty jokes online, they will be blushed and their hearts will beat, and they will listen to men bragging with great interest? A clever girl; When couples are together, boys start with the end, girls know the one-second dirty jokes, and when boys find them, they will seriously point out the logical loopholes in each other's bragging content? A strong woman.

5. In the north, what does it mean to be slightly spicy? Put some pepper symbolically? And in Ningxiang, Changsha, what is spicy? Symbolically, less Chili? .

6. When I was shopping with my son, I met an acquaintance selling cherries. The acquaintance asked the child to grab a handful of cherries, but the child hesitated and didn't start. ? Don't you like cherries? Asked the old acquaintance. ? Love to eat. ? So the old acquaintance grabbed a handful of cherries and stuffed them into the child's pocket. On the way home, the mother asked her son, My uncle asked you to take cherries, why didn't you? Because his hands are bigger than mine. ?

7. My cousin's elementary school math problem, is this math problem against the sky?

8. On one occasion, I accompanied two foreign clients in a car. A person has been here for half a year and has become accustomed to all kinds of life. Another woman came for two days. When the car passed the green light at the intersection, the female customer was panicked and asked me whether China should go first with the green light or the red light. Before I could say anything, the one who came for half a year came. Brave people go first? .

9. I was idle in the office today, playing with magnets, and was seen by the leader. The leader reached out and took it. What happened? With a whoosh, the magnet was suddenly attracted by the leader's gold ring. . .

10. The elevator is about to close, and suddenly you hear it? Wait? What came running in a hurry was a charming beauty. After the beautiful woman squeezed in, the elevator suggested that she was overweight. The beauty shook her head, smiled at me and got out of the elevator. However, the elevator still shows overweight. I know, it was the beautiful woman who left her heart in the elevator! I walked out of the elevator with my head held high, but the elevator still reminded me that I was overweight. An aunt roared, young man, you have lost your honor all over the floor ......

Inspiring funny jokes (classic)

1. I quarreled with my best friend during the Cold War. That girl shook me on qq at noon and sent me one? I was puzzled and embarrassed to ask her what it meant, so I copied and pasted it and asked my friend what it was. A cousin's simple and powerful answer, this thing in Excel means automatic summation.

2. I'm going to name my future child. The boy is Xiao Ye and the girl is Xiaoye. In this way, teachers and classmates are very affectionate and beautiful: grandpa! Grandpa! As a result, I saw on the news today that Han Han named his daughter Xiaoye. . . Will you celebrities pay attention? My plan has been messed up again, ok! (@ Asshole Vasily)

The reason for smoking is simple: grandpa smokes, dad smokes, and it's my turn not to break the fragrance.

4. Elementary school math problem: There are 75 cows and 34 sheep in a boat. How old is the captain?

5. "What kind of girl do you like?" ? I like ugly girls. ? So what do you think of my kiss? I like bad girls, not bad ones. Get out! Get out of here! ! ?

6. One year on the anniversary of the school, a ceremony was held. During the ceremony, the host asked questions and randomly selected students to answer them. If the answer is right, there will be a small gift. It's time to ask questions. The host's question is who is the oldest emperor in history? I chose a wonderful flower in our class, and then I leisurely answered into the microphone:? Jade Emperor. . . ? The first three rows of leaders suffered internal injuries, and our class teacher was instantly covered with black lines.

7. A man went to a restaurant for dinner and said to the proprietress:? Give me a bowl of beef noodles, thin but not soup. ? The proprietress went to invite him to dinner. After a while, the cook came out with a kitchen knife. You tell me what to do, come on! ?

8. One night when I was walking by the unnamed lake, I saw a pair of younger brothers and sisters sitting there watching the scenery. After a while, the wind blew, and the boy whispered in the girl's ear, "Can I hug you when it's cold?" The girl gave him a shy look and said, "No?" I thought he couldn't miss a great opportunity like me, so he flew up and kicked the girl into the lake with all his strength? Come on, junior, the senior can only help you here?

9. I remember last year's sophomore year, the homework left by the English teacher was a paper. I went home at night, just lit the candle, and stopped doing the big questions at the back. I burned a hole in that question, but I didn't expect to be praised for handing in my homework the next day. The teacher said that everyone should study hard. If there is no electricity at night, I should light candles to finish my homework.

10. One day, Xiaoming went to school. Classmates say his face looks like an ass. Xiaoming ran out sadly. Come to the edge of a well. He put his head into the well to see if he really looked like a donkey. Just as he put his head in, the excavator at the bottom of the well suddenly shouted to him: You fucking shit down there, you're dead! ! ?

Stimulate humorous jokes (selected articles)

1. I tell you, if you are on the bus, don't give your seat to the old lady? Last time I gave in, as a result, they never let me be a driver again!

2. When correcting the composition "My Teacher", the teacher found such a passage: Teacher, you are like a diligent gardener, sending students from one temple to another, and now you are sending students away from this temple. Conversation? Is it misspelled? Temple? . Teacher's comment: When you sent this away? Temple? I stopped being a gardener and became an abbot.

3. Who the fuck added two eyeballs ~ ~ instantly amused me to death ~

4. Throw two sweet MaiQuan into the coffee cup, and then. .

5.？ My wife is so diligent that I can't stand it! ? What happened? I get up at five in the morning to drink water. But when I got back to the house, she had folded the quilt and cooked the meal. ?

6. The coach encouraged the female students who just got the driver's license to drive boldly on the road. Female student:? I'm afraid of coach: What are you afraid of? Someone else, not you! ?

7. In the Internet cafe, a woman came in, looked around, came to a boy and scolded him by the ear. Didn't you go to the teacher's house to make up lessons? While protecting his ears, the boy stared at the display screen and shouted, Dad, someone hit me! ? The man was furious:? Where is it? I'll take care of him? Unexpectedly, the woman came to see him again, grabbing his ear and scolding: Didn't you go to work overtime?

8. I got up early to catch the bus, and I finally waited for one, so I couldn't squeeze it. So the driver's eldest brother said, I'll start the car first, drive slowly, and you run after the car. I wonder: what does this mean? Running behind the car, I saw that the car had been driving for several meters. Suddenly, the passengers in the car couldn't hold on, and all fell to the front of the car. The back door suddenly gave way to a big place. At this time, the driver's big brother proudly greeted me: Go!

9. A mother who works in a foreign company actually found that her breast milk in the company refrigerator was 40ML less. It is said that her colleagues used it to make coffee. . .

10. I met a MM blind date for the second time. MM deliberately shows off her? Crazy? Mobile phone, I pretended not to play crazy and asked her about various functions. Suddenly found a name in her address book? Spare tire? People, suddenly thinking of her, asked her: Is your friend's surname Bei? MM (very nervous)? Can I have my cell phone back? I pretended not to give it, but she accidentally dialed it in the process of grabbing it, and my cell phone rang.

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