Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - A sketch about low-carbon life (funny)
A sketch about low-carbon life (funny)
Time: midsummer
Venue: Aunt Wang's home
Character: Aunt Wang (58 years old)
Xiaodong (Aunt Wang's son, about 33 years old)
Xiaohui (Xiaodong's wife is 30 years old)
Bao Er (7-year-old Xiaodong son)
Ma, director of the neighborhood committee (hereinafter referred to as "Ma")
Chairman of China Association for Science and Technology (referred to as "Dong")
The curtain opened a round table and set some dishes.
Bao Er: (uncovering the bowl) Wow, boiled cabbage, (uncovering the second bowl), hey, boiled cabbage with cabbage, (uncovering the third bowl), ha, stewed cabbage with cabbage!
Xiaodong: Be content. Yesterday, your grandmother cooked a big bowl of cabbage. Today, at least three bowls. (Look) Of course, they all taste the same.
Xiaohui: So is Mom. Whenever I engage in any activities, I regard myself as an expert, saying that low-carbon bar is harder than cabbage, which makes me want to vomit at the sight of cabbage.
Xiaodong: Shh, here comes the expert.
Aunt Wang (dressing backwards and holding some fans in her hand): Hurry up, hurry up, hurry up!
Xiaodong: What's the matter, Mom?
Wang: Bao Er, alas, the neighborhood committee will come to our house for inspection soon.
Xiaohui: Hey, what should I take as an emergency?
Xiaodong: Check what?
Wang (holding out his chest): Low-carbon economy, low-carbon life!
Xiaodong: Mom, our economic life is already very low-carbon, which is too low.
Wang Pain: Don't take low carbon seriously, your mother is already scarred.
Xiaodong Xiaohui came over and said, Mom, where are you hurt?
Wang pushed away: I mean mother earth, big concept, big concept, understand?
Director Ma accompanied Chairman Dong of the Association for Science and Technology to the stage.
Director Ma knocked at the door: Aunt Wang, Aunt Wang!
Wang: The inspection team did come. Put those two bowls of cabbage down quickly.
They put the dishes under the table in a hurry, and Wang was ready to open the door. He turned and threatened, look into my eyes, or else, huh? .
Xiaohui looked at her husband: I'm not afraid of high mountains and deep waters, but I'm afraid your mother will hum.
Hearing this, Wang said with displeasure, Huh? Say what?
Xiaohui smiles apologetically: It's raining heavily, so everyone should pay attention to low carbon. I open the door, I open the door. (It is Ma and Dong Jin who open the door)
Ma: Aunt Wang, this is Chairman Dong of the District Association for Science and Technology, who has come to visit your home specially.
Everyone quickly lined up and stood at attention: hello, chief!
Aunt Wang raised her hand and everyone applauded: welcome, warm welcome, welcome!
Dong: Comrades have worked hard! Hey, where is this? (Looking at the table) A bowl of Chinese cabbage. Hey, Aunt Wang, is it easy to eat on weekends?
Bao Er whispered: No, no, there are two bowls under the table!
Wang Zihao: We persistently promote the low-carbon life movement. Don't you think?
The crowd lazily: It's …
Wang snapped, huh?
Z: yes!
Dong: Huh? Why do I feel like I have entered a big feudal family?
Xiaodong: The leader wronged my mother. Our family is not feudal, just like going back to the old society.
Wang: Nonsense, our family has only been low-carbon for one month 13 days, which is far from enough! (Raise your hand and point) I have been looking forward to the leader's inspection for a long time. (Lyric) Let the storm come more violently!
With a wave of the king's hand, Xiaodong posed in unison: Come more violently! (Artificial echo) Some ... Some. ...
Ma and Dong looked at each other.
Ma: Aunt Wang knows a lot about low-carbon life. This time, our city ...
Wang pushed the horse aside: Yes, this time, our city is United. Adhere to flood control and disaster relief, not low-carbon economic life. (Please) Yes, Chairman Dong!
Dong Xiao: Old people have a good attitude. What is low carbon?
Wang disdainfully: Bao Er, tell me first, what is low carbon?
Bao Er: Dad? Is that no one will listen to what my mother says in the future. No, dad doesn't listen, grandma listens.
Wang (hands behind his back, shaking his head): The so-called low-carbon, low-carbon, is a low-energy and low-consumption life. For example ... it's like (looking around) ...
Bao Er: For example, saving water. Face washing water can be used to wash feet, and foot washing water can be used to water flowers.
Wang: Bao Er is really nice. That's what grandma meant.
Bao Er: Please make the next question more difficult, and don't insult my IQ.
Wang (turning to Dong, looking at the bag): Just be a little harder. Don't insult my IQ. Oh, I'm sorry, Chairman Dong, I didn't say you, I didn't say you.
Dong Xiao: That's right. Save water resources.
Wang: Yes, our family used to use 40 liters for bathing, but now I strictly control it within 25 liters. Especially me, I don't wash if I can. I clearly remember that I took a shower on 1 last month, and it has passed 18 today, and I didn't feel any peculiar smell. (sniffing his armpit vigorously, satisfied expression)
Baoji (pie mouth): There is no peculiar smell, but there are many flies around.
Wang: And this dress of mine. The front is dirty, so I'll wear the back. I wore it back and forth for more than 40 days, and I didn't feel much dirty.
Wang carried his skirt and shook it, telling Ma and Dong to watch. The horse covered his nose, and Xiaodong and Xiaohui grinned.
Dong Xiao: Old man, the attitude is good, but the method. ...
Wang grabbed the woman and said, thank you. Applause.
Bao Er applauded with a wry smile, and Wang bowed modestly with westernization.
Wang: In order to advocate a low-carbon life in the future, while Chairman Dong is here, I declare several disciplines. Please stand up!
Xiaodong: Everyone is standing!
Wang (hands behind his back): First, starting from next week, Xiao Dong, stop driving your car and squeeze the bus to work every day to reduce greening? Carbon emissions.
Dong: What carbon? Is your car still burning firewood?
Xiaohui: Mom, it's called carbon monoxide.
Wang: Anyway, there is a carbon word.
Xiaodong: Mom ...
Wang: Hmm! Opinions can be reserved. Second, in order to further implement the energy saving of household appliances, all air conditioners, refrigerators and washing machines in the house will not be used from tomorrow.
Xiaohui: Huh? Handmade?
Wang (giving fans to everyone): Yes. From now on, clothes should be rubbed by hand. As for the refrigerator, I'm going to take it to the flea market tomorrow and dispose of it completely. Destroy them all!
Xiaohui went to the motorcycle in a panic. Mom, can I keep my motorcycle?
Wang: No, it's all ruined!
Xiaohui: Huh? Thank you for holding my hand, but it's a pity that you didn't accompany me to the end.
Wang: There are also video games.
Bao Er: Ah! Grandma, my game machine can develop brain intelligence.
Wang: Your grandmother on earth is almost gone, and your intellectual development is useless.
Dong: Aunt Wang, you really went back to before liberation.
Bao Er: Eat chaff and swallow vegetables with both hands and feet.
M: Not only before liberation, but almost all of them returned to BC after that.
Bao Er: Eat, drink and slash and burn.
Wang: Please rest assured that our family will persistently respond to the low-carbon life movement and live an original ecological life.
Xiaodong: In two days, our family will wear bark and eat grass roots.
Bao Er imitates Mount Tai: Woo-woo-woo-woo.
Wang was very satisfied with Xiaodong's good work and secretly gave a thumbs-up sign.
Dong Hema: Ah! this ...
Wang: There is a third point. I am going to carry forward the boiled cabbage and continue it for a long time.
Xiaodong Xiaohui: Ah! They fell backwards and fainted. )
Bao Er hurried over: Dad-Mom-
Everyone rushed to save it. Xiaodong opened his eyes and said weakly, Nothing, I'm so excited. Boiled cabbage, ok, (crying) boiled cabbage ... my mother!
I think it doesn't look like excitement, but rather like weakness. Call an ambulance.
Xiaohui opened her eyes to stop: no, give me a cup of forgetful water.
Everyone: Huh?
Xiaohui: No, plain water.
Dong is busy pouring water, sitting in a chair with Ma Fu, and Xiaohui gulps water.
M: You look hungry and miserable.
Xiaohui gasped: boiled cabbage is good. This month, I lost 5 Jin again (gesturing).
Xiaodong said sadly that boiled cabbage is good. The leader of our unit thought I was practicing lightness skill and gave me a nickname, cabbage floating on the water.
Bao Er: Boiled cabbage is good. My deskmate wants to change seats with me today, saying that my hiccups taste like Chinese cabbage. Also, the teacher said that my face is very white now, and my classmates call me handsome …
Dong took a breath of air conditioning: huh? !
Dong turned to Aunt Wang: Grandpa, is this the low-carbon economy and low-carbon life your family is developing?
Wang: Yes, is there anything else that can't be done? Please point out that we will improve immediately!
Man: It's perfect! If we continue to be so low carbon, people will die.
Dong: Aunt Wang, I know your intentions are good. But you really misunderstood the meaning of our activities. It's completely stale.
Xiaodong: Don't criticize my mother. My mother is also trying to save her mother. No, save Mother Earth.
Dong (looking at Aunt Wang, holding hands): Old people, a low-carbon life is to let everyone use resources scientifically and enhance their scientific and technological awareness of energy conservation and emission reduction.
Wang: Yes, I am very economical!
Dong: But it's too late. This can't be done because of choking. Humans are making progress, not retrogression. Low-carbon life must be implemented under the premise of civilization.
Wang: Am I really wrong?
Dong: The goal of building a low-carbon city is to improve the level of ecological civilization construction, but it is not just to do …
Wang grabbed the conversation: it's not about formal justice, nor is it about misinterpretation and misunderstanding. I immediately realized that I had said too much. ) Chairman Dong, you said what you said.
Dong Xiao: You speak better than me. You'd better talk.
Wang nodded awkwardly, held his head high and opened his mouth several times, not knowing what to say. Finally: you guys ... do you understand?
Everyone laughed: as long as you don't eat cabbage every day. Everything else is easy to understand.
Dong: Then I'll test you at last. What is the slogan of our activity?
Self-portrait of low-carbon life
Time: comprehensive practice class
Location: In the classroom.
Character: 10 Students: Xiaodong, monitor, Xiaoming, Xiaohong, Xiaolan, Xiao Yong, Xiaoyu, Xiaojie, Lily and Xiaohuan; 1 Teacher: Teacher Liu
During the break, the students played games happily. At this moment, Ding's doorbell rang.
Xiaodong (excited, loud) is in class! Start class!
The classroom is very quiet. At this moment, Miss Liu walked into the classroom.
Monitor, stand up!
The students stood up with brushes.
Hello, students and teachers.
Hello, Miss Liu!
Monitor, please sit down.
The students sat down neatly.
Teacher Liu, today we are going to have the first comprehensive practical class of this semester.
Student (very happy) Great! Great!
Teacher Liu, please be quiet. The theme of this class is self-portrait of low-carbon life.
The students were confused and chattered about it. Xiaoming raised his hand.
Miss Liu Xiaoming.
How can teacher Lily Liu have a selfie in a low-carbon life?
Student, yes! Yeah!
Miss Liu, don't worry, class, listen to the teacher. (Slow down) In this class today, students will draw a low-carbon life in their hearts and a self-portrait.
The students were very excited when they heard that they were drawing. Xiaolan raised her hand.
Miss Liu Xiaolan, do you have any questions?
Xiaolan nodded.
Teacher Liu, please answer.
Teacher Liu Xiaolan, since you want to draw pictures related to low-carbon life, you must first know what a low-carbon life is, so what is a low-carbon life?
Teacher Liu Xiaolan asked this question very well. Do the students know?
Xiaodong, monitor, Xiao Yong, Xiaoyu, Xiaojie and Xiao Juan raised their hands.
Miss Liu Xiaojie.
Xiaojie, I think low carbon means saving and not wasting!
Teacher Liu Xiaoyong.
Xiao Yong's low-carbon life is to care for the environment.
Teacher Liu Xiaodong.
Small things and low carbon means driving less and walking more.
……
Actually, Mr. Liu's classmates were right just now. Low-carbon life refers to reducing energy consumption in daily life as much as possible, so as to reduce carbon emissions, especially carbon dioxide emissions, reduce atmospheric pollution and slow down ecological deterioration, mainly by changing the details of life from three aspects: electricity saving, solar terms and recycling.
The students listened attentively.
Teacher Liu, now, we know what a low-carbon life is. So, what can we draw? Listen carefully! (Pause) We can draw a picture of what a low-carbon life looks like, or we can draw a picture of high-tech products in a low-carbon life, or what behaviors do not conform to the principles of a low-carbon life, and so on. There is only one requirement for our painting. We don't need to use any special technology like art classes. We only focus on. As long as we draw carefully, no matter whether it looks good or not, we will be rewarded. Now the teacher has a picture drawn by other students. Let's have a look!
The students were surprised. Teacher Liu took out the picture.
Teacher Liu believes that everyone has visited the Shanghai World Expo during the summer vacation. This painting is a solar-powered car, and the original version is in the General Automobile Hall of Shanghai World Expo. The little author chose a good material. I hope that students will pay attention to the materials when drawing. Only when they choose it can they draw well.
The students listened very carefully.
Teacher Liu: So, class, what do you want to draw in this class today? Next, I will give the students 20 seconds to think carefully and take the teacher to ask questions.
Students, scratch your ears.
Teacher Liu, let's start from Xiaodong!
Xiaodong, I want to design an advanced facility that can turn non-recyclable garbage into useful garbage.
Teacher Liu is very good. Next.
Monitor, I want to design a sign that doesn't use disposable goods.
Xiao Ming, I want to draw a cartoon to tell everyone that garbage should be separated.
Xiaohong, I want to draw a family low-carbon secret.
Xiaolan, I want to draw a dirty earth and tell people that we must take practical actions to protect the earth, otherwise the earth will become like this.
Miss Liu Xiaolan, is this attractive to everyone?
Xiaolan. Yes
Hello, Miss Liu, please sit down.
Xiao Yong, I want to attract students to the society and call on everyone to save electricity, water, oil and solar terms.
Xiaoyu, I want to draw a picture of people's low-carbon life now.
Mr. Liu's classmate has a good idea. Let's take out yesterday's tools, watercolor pens and A4 white paper, and start drawing.
Xiao Huan raised his hand.
Teacher Liu Xiaohuan
Xiao Huan, Miss Liu, do you type the manuscript with a pencil first or directly with crayons?
Teacher Liu, as I said, this is not an art class. You can draw anything you want. All right, stop talking and draw quickly.
In five minutes.
Has teacher Liu finished painting? Ok, we invite four people to exchange your paintings. Let's get started!
In a minute.
Teacher Liu, because of the time, we won't talk about it. The teacher will tell the students the content of the next comprehensive practice class.
The students are very much looking forward to it.
Teacher Liu has the next class, and we have the last class on Friday afternoon. At that time, together with other students, we will go out of school and go out to the society, send the pictures drawn today to people, and call on everyone to start from me and live a low-carbon life.
Xiao Yong was right. Low-carbon life starts with me.
Xiaoming's low-carbon life starts with me.
Teacher Liu, let's talk about low-carbon life together.
Students start with me.
The monitor dismissed
Students, Miss Liu, thank you.
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