Girlfriend wants to hear jokes. Who's funny? rapid return

Introduce what I like, I don't know if it is useful.

1、

Ji Xiaolan, a litterateur in Qing Dynasty, was smart and eager to learn since childhood, with a wide range of interests. His private school teacher, Mr. Shi, is a very old-school pedant, and Xiaolan is disgusted with him. One day, Xiaolan went to feed the housebird, dug a deep hole in the brick wall, fed the housebird and sent it back to the hole, blocked it with bricks to prevent it from flying away. Later, when Mr. Shi found out, he threw the house finch to death, sent it back to the cave to block it, and put a couplet on the wall:

The fine-feathered bird died behind the brick.

When Xiaolan went to feed the house bird again, she found it was dead. I was wondering when I suddenly saw a couplet on the wall. He decided that Mr. Shi did it, so he continued to write the second couplet:

Mr. Si Tong, coarse-haired beast

Mr. Shi was greatly annoyed when he saw it. He felt that Xiaolan should not insult the teacher, so he motioned to Xiaolan. I saw Xiao Lan calmly explain, "I wrote it according to my husband's first couplet. If there is fineness, there must be roughness; Feather must have hair; Where there is a home, there must be a wild place; Where there are birds, there must be beasts; Where there are bricks, there must be stones; After, there must be first; Where there is death, there is death. So, I wrote Mr. Rough Stone. If it should not be written like this, please rewrite it. "

Teacher Shi twisted his beard and thought for a long time, but he didn't come up with a satisfactory bottom line. Finally, he sighed helplessly, put down his pointer and left.

2. Counter-revolutionary crime of overturning public cars. It is said that one day, a bus passed by the road in front of an old farmer's house, and the wheat paved on the road was too heavily pressed. As a result, the old farmer pointed to the bus and swore, "I put you on a blind bus. Whose wheat did you crush, huh?" I'll let you off a blind bus! "At this time, his dog also chased around the bus and kept biting. You just said that this man scolded. You said that the dog bit the car, which was really nosy. Unexpectedly, in order to avoid the dog in front of the car, the driver accidentally drove the bus into a ditch on the side of the road, and the bus overturned, causing several injuries. This is terrible. The old farmer was arrested by the public security bureau, and the conviction at the trial was quite difficult. It is wrong to determine the crime of attempted counter-revolutionary murder, and it is also wrong to determine the crime of counter-revolutionary injury. Finally, the old farmer was sentenced for the crime of counter-revolutionary scolding public cars. In fact, I think as far as the situation was concerned, the old farmer didn't turn over the car, but his dog did. Therefore, it is not accurate to convict the old farmer for the crime of counter-revolutionary scolding the public car. It is most accurate to sentence his dog to counter-revolutionary biting over the public car.

3. The shameful crime of counter-revolution. It is said that when the educated youth went to the countryside, a beautiful young female educated youth was sent to a remote rural area to receive revolutionary re-education exercise. That's great. A silly boy in the country is abnormal because he has never seen such a beautiful woman in the city. Every time this beautiful educated youth goes to the toilet, she peeks from the hole under the toilet. The previous peeping didn't find out, silly boy continued to peep. As a result, once he didn't get it right, he quarreled and was finally caught. Running back while crying. In that era of extremely pure ethics, it was a great shame for a young intellectual woman to be peeped at. Being peeped at is like losing your virginity. This is the shame of a woman's life. It is completely different from the concept of the times that intellectual women are proud of boldly showing their body art naked. The young woman felt ashamed and extremely depressed. Although he was organized to do ideological and political work many times, he hanged himself because he was ashamed to meet people. Previously, this silly boy was immediately arrested by the public security bureau. Later, the court trial was said to be inaccurate in the determination of counter-revolutionary homicide and counter-revolutionary hooliganism. In the end, this silly boy was condemned to counter-revolution and was sentenced to death and shot.