Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - It’s so boring. Whoever is willing to tell me 5 hot jokes will get points. Don’t plagiarize. Anyway, as long as it’s something I haven’t seen, it’s fine.
It’s so boring. Whoever is willing to tell me 5 hot jokes will get points. Don’t plagiarize. Anyway, as long as it’s something I haven’t seen, it’s fine.
1. Wukong! You bastard! It's a good thing that you don't have a mother or an uncle, otherwise I would see how my teacher would scold you! How many times have I told you that after the banshee catches me, wait for my signal and come to rescue you again! Stop smiling so playfully! Look at me, my master. Every time I am shocked by your sudden intrusion, I will become weak. If I do this a few more times, my master... I am afraid that I will never be able to save them again. What a tragedy! Wukong loves his disciple and swears by looking at his master's tears. He won't do it again, okay?
2. Guanyin Bodhisattva, please cancel the accounts of the black bear monster, green lion monster and yellow-browed old monster. We can’t afford to play anymore. Damn it. You sent us against Tang Seng and his disciples, but you raised their level so high, how can we fight? Especially Sun Wukong, with good equipment, high attribute points, and summoning skills. The most annoying thing is that physical attacks are invalid, fire-based attacks are immune, and magic-based attacks are immune... Let alone us alone, we can't beat him as a team! No more talking, it’s 88.
3. Bajie! You idiot! We've traveled ten miles, and you can't change your song! Keep singing "Seeking Buddha", look at how it makes Master cry!
4. Amitabha, monks do not lie. Female benefactor, you are indeed the most beautiful and sexy woman that the poor monk has encountered since his journey to the east. Look at your hair, your jade hands, your skin, this feel...
5 . Donor, the poor monk came from the Eastern Tang Dynasty. Please stay here for one night... Huh? donor? Donor, please open the door, Donor? Hold!
6. Queen, I, Tripitaka, we have arrived at the Kingdom of Lions and Camels. I miss you and kiss you. Don't reply to text messages. It's inconvenient because my apprentice is here.
7. You monkey, you don’t respect your teachers. Why did you wear a leopard print apron to look sexy in front of that spider spirit? Why do you steal the limelight from being a teacher? Shut up! I don’t care if you have leopard print or tiger skin! Do you still know who you are? You are a person who has been released from prison, how can you pretend to be stupid in front of me? You see, you dye your hair yellow and carry a steel pipe, pretending to be young and Dangerous? Damn... Haha, Amitabha, that's so good, my teacher is a little out of sorts.
8. Wukong, let Bajie go into the water to catch the carp spirit. You are not good at water. If you drown, how can you afford the salvage fee? Oh, no, no, Bajie is fine, he will float on his own.
9. Bajie, Wukong is not here, go and make some fast food. Wu Jing, go drink the horse first. ... Bajie, Bajie, come here. remember! Let's go to the house we passed by just now. Yes, it's the house where a village woman and a child live. As soon as we passed by, we could smell the fragrance. She was making soy pork elbows. It was so delicious! Go ahead, it’s just a mother and son, if you don’t give it, take it! Go and come back quickly!
10. Brother Monkey, did you propose to Fairy Zixia with this ring? You are so funny! You don’t even have half a carat diamond, no one else would be interested in you! Chang'e was so embarrassed at me and said: Don't tell me whether you love me or not, first look at how big the diamond ring is! Alas, fairies nowadays are so realistic. I'm telling you, this fairy daughter, if you try to beat her to death with a diamond brick, she won't even cry out for help!
11. Haha, the market here is really lively. I haven’t passed through such a busy area for a long time. Hey Wukong, look at those little kids from the Western Region who have been following us since just now. They have curly hair and big eyes, and they are so well-behaved! It's so simple and cute, hahaha... Huh? Bajie, where is your rake? Hey Wujing, where is our luggage? ah! Where is my white dragon horse? !
12. Wukong, Bajie, and Wujing came to the teacher. Sigh... I am definitely not blaming my teacher, but have you all forgotten my teachings? You, my master and my disciples are all members of the Buddhist sect, and we have many taboos and precepts.
You should always keep this in mind: don’t steal, don’t lie, don’t speak harshly, don’t be greedy, don’t be angry, and don’t be delusional! Since your heart is devoted to Buddha, if you don't cultivate yourself, how can you achieve true enlightenment? Okay, I’m here to ask you, who the hell is that? Last night, while I was sleeping, you secretly logged in and stole my food? !
13. Look, Junior Brother Sha, if you just catch a cockroach spirit, Brother Monkey will invite all the gods in the sky? Seriously, have you ever seen this monkey catch a goblin on his own so many times? Every time, he screams at the goblin: "Don't leave! Don't leave if you have the guts! I'll blow the whistle and call for people to chop you to death!" Hey, he has so many magical powers! Hey, look at how many gods have come to the sky. There are also a few people riding brooms. Wow, all the sanitation personnel from heaven have been called here.
14. "Wukong! Don't be rude! Oh, old man, the poor monk came from the Eastern Tang Dynasty. He passed by here today. I wonder if the old man can open the door for convenience...Old man, please stop insulting me. The poor monk apologizes for the big disciple... ...Old man, please stop hitting the poor monk with your stick...Old man...please try to touch me again?...Oops, Wukong! Kill him too! The tooth was knocked out and the eye was blinded and the leg was discounted! ”
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