A joke that makes people laugh for a second.

1. 1 I am jealous to see others making money, but I am incompetent, so I have to change my direction and close my eyes.

2. When I went to the hospital for a physical examination, the doctor took my report and said, "It's a good thing you came early ..." When I was shocked into a cold sweat, the doctor said unhurriedly, "If it's later, I'll get off work."

Don't talk about meeting the right person at the best age. I just want to get something for nothing at the best age, and I can surf and lie around at any time.

I want to buy things when I'm angry. When I buy things, I have to spend money. When I spend money, my money becomes less. I get angry when I have little money.

The biggest failure in life is Tang Priest, and people around him, whether friends or enemies, always want to send him to the West.

6. There are three things on the Internet that you can't compare with others at will: money, beauty and sense of humor! Because as long as you compare, you will find yourself poor, ugly and stupid!

7. People's minds will change: they used to want to get rich, but now they are more practical and just want to get rid of poverty.

8. For me who can't control my mouth and is too lazy to die, I am losing weight if I don't continue to gain weight.

9. My girlfriend scolded me for doing something wrong, and then ignored her until she farted, and then I farted. She said, Yo, how dare you talk back? Finally broke the tough atmosphere. ...

10. Who said that "if you don't forget, you will have the aftermath"? The person you like never talks to me and wants to get rich overnight, which has never come true.

1 1. Many people are constantly planning their lives, and they are under great pressure every day. Actually, no matter how you live. You'll regret it. Think of you in the past few decades.

12. Yesterday, a couple asked me how to get to the hotel. I did not hesitate to show them the direction to Xinhua Bookstore, hoping that they could find themselves lost in the sea of knowledge!

13. In the big night, I can also see many takeaway brothers rushing to deliver food on the street, and suddenly feel very inspirational. I have no reason not to eat when others are still eating so late.

14. Mom: You should get married! Me: Is it necessary to be happy when you get married? I have a classmate who has been married three times. Why bother? Mom: If the marriage is bad, how many people can get married three times?

15. I just went to a small shop to buy water and saw my boss fall asleep in a rocking chair. The proprietress also beat his leg, and I instantly felt so loving. I couldn't bear to disturb them, so I took two bottles of coke and left quietly.

16. When you like someone, your brain will automatically add a filter to whiten and exfoliate. When you don't like it, the second changes to the original picture. God, was I blind?

17. Many things in life will eventually get better with time. Like many people who were just fat, they became fat after a long time.

18. A patient with indigestion complained to the doctor: I have been very abnormal recently. Pull whatever you eat, cucumber and watermelon, how to return to normal? The doctor is silent for a moment, then you can only eat shit.

19. Relax. Although there is no overtime pay for overtime work, there is no overtime pay for those who do not work overtime!

20. Now, what you can't get up is your grades, what you can't get down is your weight, what you can afford to put down is chopsticks, and what you can't get in and out is the quilt!

2 1. Go to bed early and exercise more, don't smoke or drink, and form a good habit of going to bed early and getting up early. Over time, when you are upset and can't sleep, you will have no friends to accompany you.

22. I am obviously a rich second generation, but I still have to work hard to make money. I can eat by my face, but I still have to work hard to make money. This is the gap between me and Mingming.

23. The ugly duckling becomes a white swan, not only because it works hard, but because its parents are white swans!

24. I just went to the barber shop for a haircut. The boss asked me how to cut it. I said, "Nice cut!" At this time, an aunt who was baking oil and perming her hair looked at me and said, "Look at you, young man. Don't embarrass the boss. It is not easy for people to make some money. "