Recommend several humorous stories in classical Chinese and their translations.

Taoist, monk, beard crossed the river. Suddenly, when the wind blew, the boat was about to capsize, and monks and Taoists panicked. They threw the scriptures into the river and asked God for help. There is nothing to throw at the beard, just tear it off one by one and throw it into the river. The monk asked, "What's the use of pulling out a beard?" The man said, "I throw my hair (anchor) here."

Translation:

A Taoist priest, a monk and a bearded man were crossing the river when suddenly they met a strong wind and the ship was about to sink. Monks and Taoists are afraid. Hurriedly throw the scriptures into the river and ask God for help. Beard had nothing to throw, so he tore it off and threw it into the river. The monk asked him, "Why did you pull out your beard?" The beard replied, "I threw my hair here."

2. Cross the bridge

A countryman came back from the city and said to his wife, "I sneezed countless times in the city." The wife said, "I miss you at home." He walked across the dangerous bridge with dung on his shoulder every day. After repeating it several times, he almost slipped. Instead, he scolded, "Sao Hua Niang, even if you miss me, you have to see what it is!" "

Translation:

A countryman came home from the city and said to his wife, "I sneezed several times when I was in the city." The wife said, "That's all because I miss you at home." One day, he picked up a load of dung and walked across a rickety bridge. Suddenly he sneezed a few times and almost fell into the river. He scolded: "this slut, even if I want to, I have to see where it is!" "

3, taboo deafness

Deaf and dumb people want to hide their secrets. If you have been deaf for a day, you can sing a song and the dumb will know that you are deaf. You can tie a knot by opening and closing your lips and clapping your hands. The deaf will listen for a long time. Seeing that his lips stopped, he praised: "Wonderful, wonderful. I haven't heard good news for a long time, and today is even better. "

Translation:

The deaf envy themselves for being deaf, and the dumb envy themselves for being dumb. One day, the deaf saw the mute and begged him to sing a song, which was actually a mockery of his shortcomings. Knowing that the other person is deaf, the mute closes his lips one by one, beats his hands and pretends to sing. The deaf also pretend to listen. Seeing the mute's lips motionless, he praised him and said, "Great, I haven't heard your wonderful singing for a long time, and I have made progress today."

Step 4 yawn

A deaf man went to visit a friend. The dog barks when it sees it. He was at a loss. Meet the host. After the ceremony, he said, "Your family respects dogs. I don't think they slept last night. " The host asked, "What do I think?" Answer: "I just yawned when I saw my little brother."

Translation:

A deaf man went to visit a friend. My friend's dog saw him barking, but the deaf didn't notice him. After entering the back room to see the owner bow to each other, he said to the owner, "Does your dog think he didn't sleep last night?" The host asked, "What do I think?" The deaf man said, "The dog kept yawning when he saw his little brother."

Step 5 ask for directions

A nearsighted man got lost and saw a crow parked on a stone by the roadside. He suspected that it was human, so he repeatedly called him names. After a while, the crow flew away, and the man said, "I asked you to disagree. Your hat was blown away by the wind, so I won't tell you."

Translation:

A nearsighted man lost his way and saw a crow standing on a stone by the roadside. He thought it was a man, so he asked for directions. I asked several times, but no one answered. After a while, the crow flew away. Myopia said to himself, "Hum, I asked you if you didn't agree just now. Your hat was blown away by the wind, so I won't tell you. "