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What are the specific ways to educate children?
Methods of educating children
First, ask only four sentences a day-a unique way to educate children, which can be used for reference.
A father educated his daughter in a unique way. He never helps her with her homework or anything. He just comes back to talk to her for ten minutes every day and only talks about four questions, and then he finishes tutoring. These four questions are:
1, did anything good happen at school?
2. What good performance did you have today?
Did you buy anything good today?
4. What can I do for my father?
The seemingly simple question actually contains rich meanings:
The first question is actually to investigate her daughter's values and understand what she thinks is good and what is not;
The second problem is actually to motivate her daughter and increase her self-confidence;
The third question is to ask her to confirm what she has learned specifically;
The fourth question has two meanings, one is that I care about you very much, and the other is that learning is your own business. It is these four simple questions that contain a lot of love and care, and in fact they have proved to be very effective.
Second, establish a correct parent-child relationship.
In the educational concept, the most important thing to educate children is to handle the parent-child relationship well. If parents establish absolute responsibility in children's minds, children believe that parents love themselves unconditionally, and all parents' criticisms and praises are for their own good. If the child subconsciously believes this completely, then this relationship is benign, and it is a stable relationship of mutual concern, mutual support and mutual understanding.
In this case, the simplest thing to educate children, in the words of the great Soviet educator Suhomlinski, is? Growing up with children? . But in real life, most people's parent-child relationship is unstable or distorted, and children can't really trust their parents.
All parents love their children, but 98% of parents in China mistake the way of love for love. For example, giving children the best food and clothes is just a way of love, not love itself. And parents' love is often conditional, such as where to take you as long as you get the top three in this exam, and so on.
Love is a feeling, and one life likes another. It is an equal relationship, unconditional, accepted as a whole and accepted by the other party. It is not difficult to be a good parent. To educate children well, we must pay attention to the following words:
1, the practice of beating and scolding children with high pressure is absolutely forbidden, and an equal relationship is established.
2, truly love children unconditionally and give them spiritual love.
3. Be sure to respect your child's independent personality.
4. Educate children in a positive way and encourage and praise them frequently.
Correcting parent-child relationship is the most important point.
6. Pay attention to children's personality spirit.
Advice on educating children
1. Give children time to play casually.
American children's education scholar Thomas? Armstrong pointed out that free play is healthier and more beneficial to preschool children than planned activities. Parents should avoid filling their children's time with various activities. All children need some free and casual play time.
2. Teach him to care about others.
Happy children need to feel that they have some meaningful connections with others and understand what he means to others. To cultivate this feeling, you can help your child to get in touch with others more.
You can sort out old toys with your children and donate them to charity to help homeless children. Children can also be encouraged to participate in some volunteer activities at school. Experts point out that even at a very young age, you can get happiness from helping others. And form the habit of helping others.
3. Encourage him to do more exercise.
Playing ball games, cycling and swimming with children? Doing more exercise can not only exercise a child's physique, but also make him more cheerful. Maintaining a vibrant life can moderately relieve children's stress and emotions, make children like themselves, have a more positive body image, and find fun and a sense of accomplishment from sports.
4. laugh often
It is good for you and your children to tell jokes, make up some funny songs and laugh with them. Just laughing is good exercise.
5. Creative compliments
When children behave well, don't just say yes. Be specific, give details, and point out places that are impressive or better than last time. For example, it's really polite of you to say good morning to the doorman's uncle today.
However, we should also pay attention to praise and not develop children's false expectations. Some parents will reward their children with gifts or money, so that their children can focus on what rewards they can get, rather than doing well. Parents should let their children discover the satisfaction and sense of accomplishment brought by completing a thing, instead of rewarding him with material rewards.
The wrong way to educate children
First, the educational method of snoring Children are often in the environment of being beaten and scolded, which is a kind of destruction to their young body and mind. It will make children weak-willed, timid, in a trance, depressed and lacking in self-confidence, which will easily make them depressed and psychologically closed. Professor Lantian and Professor He Junping of China University of Political Science and Law are aiming at? Family corporal punishment of children? A survey shows that nearly two-thirds of children have suffered from domestic violence. Among the 498 college students surveyed, 54% admitted that they had experienced corporal punishment by their parents in primary and secondary schools. The most common form of corporal punishment is parents punching and kicking, accounting for 88%, and using tools, such as sticks, belts, clothes hangers, etc., accounting for 1.6%. According to the types of corporal punishment, abuse accounted for 25.28%, kneeling penalty accounted for 16.36%, standing penalty accounted for 13.38%, and parents' expulsion accounted for 4.09%. Psychologists point out that parents' abuse of corporal punishment during their children's growth will cause many psychological problems to their children.
Second, the family relationship is not harmonious. The main family members can't get along well, and often quarrel or even fight. This situation not only casts a shadow over family life, but also brings irreparable psychological trauma to children. It leads to children's withdrawn personality, strong sense of inferiority, low self-esteem and poor self-control, and may lead children to run away from home, wander the streets and even embark on the road of crime. Sometimes, parents can be like children. Because of a little thing, I couldn't help quarreling in front of the children. then what How do you get rid of your anger? How to explain it to the children? This question is very important. Having children makes it more complicated for couples to quarrel. Often things are not big, but everyone wants to speak their minds, but many words can't be said in front of the children, because they don't know what impact it will have on the children's hearts. In fact, whether the quarrel will affect the couple and children depends on the way you solve the contradiction after the quarrel.
Third, the lack of self-cultivation in speech Some parents, due to lack of cultural cultivation, usually swear and swear in front of their children, and even have low taste in speech. If they do this for a long time, their children will be rude, unreasonable, rude and arrogant when they are young, making them annoying and difficult to be accepted and accommodated by society.
Fourth, the hedonistic lifestyle Some families have considerable advantages and a rich life, but they lack a spirit of hard work, simplicity and enterprising. They are only satisfied with the happy life of ordinary citizens, doing nothing and often indulging in eating, drinking and having fun. This kind of environment may bring shortsightedness, lack of progress, pampering and cynicism to children.
Verb (abbreviation for verb) negative attitude Some parents often talk about the dark side of society, such as unhealthy trends, unfair distribution, moral decay, corruption and so on. In front of their children, complaining, saying strange things and blaming others; Some parents even reflect the dark side of society? A jingle? Tell it to the children; Promote negative outlook on life such as money worship, hedonism and egoism to children. Children's long-term contact will lack social responsibility and lofty aspirations, be extreme, emotionally unstable, selfish and arrogant. Such a child will hardly become a useful person to society in the future.
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