Humorous works with profound humor

1. My ex-girlfriend and I broke up for two reasons. 1 I had no money at that time, and she guessed that I would have no money in the future.

2.20 16 was fooled by monkeys for a year, 20 17 failed to catch the chicken party, and 20 18 failed to get lucky. Now I only hope that 20 19 can live as happy as a pig.

My mother likes playing mahjong, but then I was born. My mother resolutely gave up mahjong for me and my family because she thought it was more interesting to hit me.

I think the current game is so unreasonable that I can't play it without charge. If I had money and friends, would I still stay at home and play games?

5. Time is not pig feed, and time is not a knife to kill pigs. Time becomes feed and knife because you are a pig.

When I was fifteen, I had a younger brother. At that time, I asked my father: Why do you want to have a second child after so many years? Dad pondered for a while and said, just like playing games, it's useless to practice tuba, so you can only practice a trumpet.

7. The doctor asked the patient how he broke his bone. A: I thought there was sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes with a telephone pole. I shake and shake. Some idiot thought I was electrocuted, so he grabbed a stick and gave it to a guy.

8. Today, I saw my ex-girlfriend sitting in the back seat of a battery car, holding her current boyfriend's waist, shivering with cold. I raised my mouth, smiled smugly and got on the warm bus.

9. When something goes wrong, I will not rush to blame others, but reflect on myself first. If it is really my fault, I will think about how to pass it on to others!

10. My best friend has a good relationship with her husband. Once I asked her: If your husband had a mistress, would you divorce him? She squinted at me and said, I will never divorce in my life, I will only be widowed.

1 1. I was drinking with my friends at the food stall, and suddenly remembered that my daughter-in-law was still hungry at home, and I slapped myself in an instant. How to distract yourself by drinking? Come on, let's get started!

12. If you don't have the money or time to travel, buy a globe. The world is so big! Not only can you look! You can also look around.

13. I don't have any outstanding advantages, but I have a special eye for girls. The girls I chased all married good people in the end without exception.

14. Son, what's wrong with poverty? If you are poor, stand up and let others see that you are not only poor, but also short. What about being short? Raise your head and let them know that you are not only short but also ugly!

15. Do you know why beautiful women have been unlucky since ancient times? Because no one cares how long ugly people live.

16. Yesterday, my bag was robbed. I am sad. I cried all night. I really can't figure out where I am worse than my bag.

17. When I hate someone, if this person suddenly says that he likes me, then I don't hate each other at all. I am so principled because I can't hate a man with vision.

18. Every time you are mean to me, I think there is something wrong with you. How can you lose your temper with such a lovely me, speechless!

19. I heard that the sleeping mobile phone will radiate when it is placed next to the pillow, which scared me to get up and throw away the pillow, which scared the baby to death.

20. Girls who can never unscrew the bottle cap live a happy life, and girls who say "I can't believe it in the trough" live a man's life.