Chen Songling encountered problems in getting along with her mother-in-law. Do you think a daughter-in-law and mother-in-law should tolerate it when faced with a controlling mother-in-law?

It depends on the situation. For the sake of family harmony, you should not care about small things, but you must not give in on big things.

The problem of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has been a difficult problem since ancient times. A mother-in-law and daughter-in-law who get along particularly well are really rarer than pandas. However, most mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law do not quarrel every day. Most of them are actually in a state where it is best for no one to pay attention to the other.

Being able to treat each other with respect is the best state for mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

Why do mothers-in-law generally have a stronger desire for control? It still has something to do with the current marriage system.

Most of the current marriages are made by the woman marrying into the man’s family. No matter how much the man puts into the marriage, according to the traditional concept, the daughter-in-law becomes a member of the husband’s family, so the mother-in-law has a strong backbone. If you don’t believe me, if you try to marry a man, the mother-in-law will definitely not dare to speak loudly to her daughter-in-law.

1. For some small family matters, there is no need to take it too seriously.

Whether the cooking is salty or bland, spicy or sweet, it doesn’t matter at all. Of course, it is based on the wishes of the cook. If you don’t cook, you have no right to criticize others. After all, you are not ordering takeout.

Similarly, the same goes for other small things in life. If your living habits are different, you must be tolerant.

Young people are generally busy nowadays, and many elderly people are helping their children with housework, taking care of children, etc.

If young people still find faults, that’s actually quite wrong. Because these things are originally your responsibility, and the old man is a helper, he doesn't have to help you. So in this case, it is best not to conflict with the old man over these trivial matters in life.

And some old people are really arrogant and careless. If you feel offended, you can refuse your request.

Second, if it involves major matters related to principles, you must fight for them with reason.

If it is about children’s education or other matters that have a greater impact, then of course you should and must persist. The elderly may not understand these things, but children must explain the stakes of the matter clearly and then require them to do so.

Of course, if the daughter-in-law talks about this matter, it may be counterproductive. You can ask your husband to do the work of the mother-in-law. Whenever the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is relatively harmonious, the husband plays a very important role in the relationship.

As a daughter-in-law, you must stick to your own bottom line, and you must also show your bottom line to your mother-in-law and let her know what you cannot tolerate, so that she will not dare to challenge you easily.

In fact, the problem of getting along with Chen Songling and her mother-in-law is a problem that most people will encounter in their lives, but it is only placed on celebrities, so it makes everyone feel even more embarrassed.

Fortunately, her husband is quite capable and can mediate the conflicts between their mother-in-law and daughter-in-law so that both of them have a certain sense of proportion.