Don't laugh at people in the trough.

Everyone will experience their own low point in life. The trough is a life disaster. In the trough, we will be confused, sad, helpless and even desperate. No one wants to get out of the predicament smoothly and get a new life.

Why doesn't that person bother others when he is at a low ebb?

How to do it without disturbing others?

There are many ways, but one of them is what you must learn: being alone.

The more depressed I am, the more I want to turn to the outside world, but I forget that I am the antidote, and God helps those who help themselves.

Out of the trough, need three points:

1: rational reflection

2. Emotion heals itself

3. Value-added period

It is also in the trough that loneliness is the best friend of these three points.

1: The trough is the beginning of self-reflection.

In 2005, when I was very young, I once played in my neighbor's house, but I was in fatal danger when playing games. My eyes were saved, but I left a permanent scar on my face and eyes.

For a beautiful young girl, loving beauty is my nature, and my face is my life. The scar on my face made me enter the trough of my school days. In order to cover that scar, I habitually left long bangs to cover my eyes.

Slowly began to grow up, I told myself, should my future life be firmly bound by a scar?

I couldn't sleep that night. I was lying in bed alone, with the lights off and my eyes open, thinking about the answer to that question in my mind while watching the night.

Thinking about my own thoughts, I gradually told myself that it was God who made me suffer this robbery, perhaps to remind myself that human faces are fragile and vulnerable after all. After thinking about this, I started an unusual childhood.

After that, I began to enter a new world.

In order to get the best answer in my heart, I came out early to mix the society, and under the tempering of society, I had a different self.

I worked hard to improve myself, during which I developed a series of good habits. Sometimes I will read books for a while anytime and anywhere, and I will love traveling more and more, and feel the happiness brought by nature in the vast and magnificent scenery.

The trough is painful. If you want to make progress, you must reflect on it.

When you calm down, reflect on yourself, analyze the root of your predicament and find out your own problems, you can come up with solutions, get out of the trough and get a new life. If you want to grow up, you have to endure pain. Although it is painful in this process, as long as you endure it, you will begin to succeed.

When is that person the easiest to reflect on?

When you're alone.

Actor Chen once said: "Loneliness is a test of a person.

Being alone means getting along with yourself and having a spiritual dialogue with yourself.

Because only by being alone can people shield themselves from outside interference, calm down and examine themselves, face life squarely and think rationally about reality and the future.

Moreover, when people are frustrated, negative emotions such as depression, anxiety, inferiority and depression are thrown at you. At this time, people's hearts will be extremely sensitive and fragile. Even if others are willing to help you, you may not necessarily listen. Instead, you might as well think for yourself.

Just like me, people who know me don't know my problems or how to get out of the trough.

But if someone directly told me what the big deal was, I might not have taken this sentence as advice at that time, and it would be better to let myself reflect on myself calmly.

For a person who can reflect on himself, even if others don't remind me, I will try to save myself sooner or later; And those who don't understand self-reflection, even if others give you advice, you still won't pay the bill, and you still can't recognize yourself and get out of the predicament.

Therefore, if you are at the bottom of your life, you might as well spend more time with yourself, relax your thoughts and analyze yourself rationally in combination with the actual situation, which will help you better understand yourself and find a suitable way out.

People often think that being sociable is an ability.

But it ignores that being good at solitude is a more advanced ability.

2. The trough is your own healing period.

20 18 experienced a period of depression.

We dated for three years, but we weren't married.

He cheated on me, and when I found out, he promised me that he would disown each other and never see each other again.

However, a month passed, but I found that he was still with each other, ambiguous.

Finally, we broke up.

During the period after breaking up, I was on the verge of collapse, extremely depressed, my life was a mess, I could do nothing, and my work was not in a state.

Later I complained to my parents, hoping to get some comfort. As a result, my dad said, "Who made you blind and found such an unreliable man?" A man who is not worse than (* *) was rejected, and he insisted on choosing (* * *), which instantly made me have no desire to say more.

Talk to a good friend, and others can at most help me scold a few words about the immorality of mistress, or persuade me to relax.

Gradually, I found that finding someone to complain could not get rid of my pain, and the more I talked, the more painful it became.

So, I stopped talking to others and chose to save myself.

At that time, I had just finished my annual leave and chose to travel outside by myself.

A month later, my whole mental state was restored, and there was no trace of sadness in the past.

Later, I had dinner with friends and talked about the experience of traveling alone. During that time, I strolled by the river during the day, sat by the river when I was tired, and looked at the mirror-like river and the blue sky, and my heart slowly calmed down. When I calmed down, many things became clear.

Life is a kind of practice. As long as I think about it, there will be no obstacles. I will lose my love, but it doesn't mean I will lose my happiness. The initiative of happiness is always in your own hands.

The lonely time in Niubei Mountain cured me, and I found that sunny and cheerful person who loves to laugh.

There will never be real empathy in the world. Don't expect too much from others when you are at a low point. After all, the pain is not on others. You can't expect others to understand and comfort you.

Even if others really understand you and comfort you, it's no use. We can't get out of depression, not because we don't understand those truths, but because we are not ready to reconcile with ourselves, and this reconciliation needs one-on-one and ourselves.

I have a good friend who is very close to him, but no matter whether he is emotionally hurt or frustrated in his career, he never needs the comfort of others when he encounters a trough in his life.

I asked him why. He said that people don't need comfort when they are in a trough, and the key to unlocking the knot will never be held by others.

After all, your own injuries should be healed by yourself.

When people are in the trough, solitude is the best self-healing, and every time they get out of the predicament, they will gain a stronger self.

3. The trough period is your growth and appreciation period.

20 16 years, I have been in a comfortable circle. My old job was very stable. I have always felt that other platforms are bigger and have more development opportunities. I jumped into the boat without hesitation and came to a magical place. As a result, I found that my job was only a small part.

I gave up my good job and bright future, but what I got was not satisfactory.

After losing the support of the original platform, those friends in the past workplace began to become more and more cold and distant.

Although there was a loss at the bottom of my career, I didn't sink because of it.

Since I have a lot of time alone every day, I can't waste it like this. I want to make good use of my extra time alone to realize my self-appreciation.

During this period of solitude when the epidemic recovered, I began to practice my eloquence and reading mode after coming home from work every day, mainly reading such speech books as Speech, Eloquence and Influence, so as to accumulate richer speech knowledge.

During the period, I also reported to the class. I go to class seriously during class and record the teacher's key points. After I went home, I went back to review what I had learned. When there is no class, continue to learn the knowledge of lecture training camp online.

Charging myself when I am alone not only makes me accumulate a lot of knowledge, but also makes me deeply realize the importance of speech.

Many successful friends and entrepreneurs around me, what is their biggest anxiety?

Is there no time?

What do you need time for?

In fact, it is not to make money, but to learn and grow.

It is because they get along so well that time is too expensive. They may earn a lot of money every half day, so they can't stop working for more than ten hours every day. There are no weekends, holidays or even Spring Festival.

Why are you still anxious after making so much money?

It is easy for a person to make money now, because his past study, growth and accumulation make him valuable now, so he can make money.

Now he spends all his time making money every day. Although the money is increasing, he is actually consuming his precious money. He is too busy to grow up. How long can he earn this money? I have never had time to improve myself. Can you still make money in the future?

The trough is different, and it is naturally a period of growth and appreciation.

Why?

First of all, your time is worthless at this time.

You no longer have to worry that reading a good book will delay your making money, attending classes will delay your cooperation, and it is not cost-effective to improve a certain skill.

Secondly, you are worthless to others.

For example, you used to make dozens of phone calls a day and drink several times a week, but now no one needs you.

Finally, don't disturb others.

People used to greet you respectfully wherever you went, and you listened to everything you said, but now it has become an interruption.

Mr. Jiang Yang said: In a high position, all you see are flashy spring dreams; When you are humble, you have a chance to see the truth of the world.

Don't disturb others when people are at a low ebb. Everything has advantages and disadvantages. Positive people always see the winning side and never turn over. Don't say "I'm at the bottom" in the future, please tell yourself that I'm growing and adding value.

When you learn to be alone, facing the ups and downs of life is the best answer.