Why do some honest people have poor popularity in the workplace?

Because they only know things, not people! When I was young, I always thought that as long as I did what I should do according to the requirements of the leaders, I would be recognized and appreciated by the leaders, and it was not difficult to get a promotion and salary increase.

But after several years of hard work, several colleagues around me who joined the company later than me have been promoted, and I am still standing still, and I am very unhappy.

Once I chatted with an old friend, I always complained that the leader had no vision. I have worked hard for so many years, why can't I get a promotion every time?

My friend woke me up with a word. He said, "It's hard to get ahead because you only know about things and don't know about people!" "

What does this sentence mean? I sum up my friend's words in the following three points.

1, understanding human nature can be invincible. In this world, behind everything are people, and behind everyone is human nature. Only by understanding human nature, thoroughly understanding a person's likes and dislikes, and then doing what you like and solving your worries, will you be invincible in the workplace.

If you don't believe me, look at those business tycoons around you, or management experts, or big bosses with money. They are not experts in using human nature.

It is precisely because they make full use of greed and ignorance in human nature that every decision they make, or routines, can capture people's hearts and make everyone willing to pay for their routines.

Just like the ubiquitous price reduction promotion activities, these marketing routines are all taking advantage of human weakness.

Numerous successful marketing cases in reality illustrate the benefits of thinking about people.

The same is true in the workplace. It is only a matter of time before you get along with leading colleagues, as long as you can fully understand their likes and dislikes, do what you like, and properly solve their worries.

2. Different people can be like a duck to water. The ancients said, "Wise men are afraid of disaster, fools are afraid of punishment", which means that wise men are afraid of doing wrong and being criticized by others. Fools are only afraid that their health or interests will be damaged, so they should treat different people differently and never treat them equally.

I think everyone should understand this truth, but when we face specific people and things, it may be difficult to quickly judge what strategies should be used to deal with it.

In fact, there is a relatively simple way to judge, that is, what a person cares most about will be hurt.

For example, a person who cares about his reputation is likely to be hurt by other people's words or public opinion, so it is appropriate to deal with such people and reason.

But if a person doesn't care about his own reputation and only cares about interests, then he probably doesn't care about what others think of him, so it is suitable to talk about gains and losses with such people.

Therefore, if you walk in the society, you will not only do your own thing well, but everything will be fine. Knowing how to treat people differently can make you feel at home in complicated interpersonal communication.

3. How many feelings are true and how many are false in the process of interpersonal communication?

This question may be difficult for most people to answer.

But in fact, most people's feelings are based on interests.

Because of this, everyone is forced to wear a mask to cope with interpersonal relationships in work and life, do things against one's will, and say things against one's will just to survive.

Honest people often suffer losses here because they can't tell the truth from the false, so they trust others, always open-minded and unprepared, and eventually they will get black and blue all over themselves.

For example:

Honest people also know that they can't lend money to others easily, but they can't hold their pity and beg, so they finally lend it out.

I didn't realize how naive I was until I asked for the bill.

Therefore, in the process of interpersonal communication, we must distinguish between authenticity and falsehood, and then decide how to deal with it, so that feelings can be relaxed.

Years of exploration in the workplace have given me a deeper understanding of what my friends said.

Generally speaking, the root cause of the poor popularity of honest people is that they don't understand human nature and only know how to do things, but ignore the handling of interpersonal relationships.

And interpersonal relationship is very important to everyone. It not only affects our lives, but also determines the upper limit of our lives.

Therefore, from now on, there is absolutely no harm in being a smart and honest person and thinking more about others when things happen.

Pay attention to me and let you take fewer detours! Too rigid, inflexible, unable to chat, powerless, of little use to others, naturally unpopular. In essence, the workplace is still a place where bullying is afraid of hard work and kowtowing to power. The softer and more honest people are, the more difficult it is to gain the understanding and trust of others.

However, it is difficult to change a person's personality in a short time. It doesn't matter if it's because of honesty.

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There are two characters in the original unit: a down-to-earth, honest and strong child.

Practicality means that he is methodical, slow and rigid, and rarely makes a thing colorful. But you never delay, even if you burn the midnight oil, you have to get things done.

Honesty means that he is opaque and doesn't understand many things. He is always childish, and he can't find the right point in his speech.

Being strong means that he is healthy. Relying on this body, he contracted all the heavy work and hard work of the unit. Every time there is physical labor, the first thing that comes to mind is him.

A child means that he has little social experience and has not developed "the ability to face the society".

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Although he has done a lot of work, although he never hurts anyone, he is always not recognized and universally respected by everyone.

Investigate its reason,

It is not that the people around him are bad, but that he is not cunning enough, not smooth enough, and does not know how to manage his personal image.

People around him have no obligation to explore whether his heart is beautiful or not, but only care about what he shows.

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Being capable means that he is really capable. He is not only extremely capable at work, but also invincible in interpersonal communication and joint communication.

Cunning means that he is extremely cunning. He has never been "accused" in his work and has never been caught by anyone in his daily life.

It fucking means he really screwed up. Anyone who dares to fuck him will say anything. Anyone who dares to bully him is simply suicidal. His motto is "shameless is more shameless than him".

Guy means that he has a strong loyalty in the Jianghu. As long as he hasn't cheated him, he will take care of everyone and protect him everywhere.

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Although he is really fucking, although he has many shortcomings, but he is doing well in the unit, almost no one dares to come forward to provoke:

No matter how many means he has, people around him not only admire him, but also feel at ease and beneficial to be with his peers.

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So, why do some honest people have poor popularity? The workplace is no better than school. It is a place to solve the problem of survival, and everything revolves around survival.

Since it is related to survival, it is naturally difficult for those who are weak, opaque and difficult to bring benefits to others to gain trust (dependence) and attention.

In the workplace where the law of the jungle is emphasized, only the strong can attract more people to cooperate (or echo).

Honest people do not have the conditions for attachment, and their natural popularity is not much better-everyone is trying to move forward and has no time to make friends.

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There is no need to be pessimistic about falling into the "whirlpool of integrity" for the time being. Few people are fucked up and successful as soon as they enter the workplace. Behind the "fucking success" are countless blood and tears and frustrations.

Most people, however, start with honesty. After countless potholes and rocks, they gradually became smart, or shameless, and finally evolved into successful creatures.

Therefore, if you are "honest and can't turn the corner" for a while and are despised and rejected by people around you, then you don't have to be nervous and sad.

As long as we embrace life bravely and try more opportunities, we can get out of the "honest dilemma" in time.

If you are lucky, you can jump out of the "fucking process" and go straight to success. After all, no one wants to live a fucking life unless forced by circumstances.

There are many honest people around us, who are honest and responsible for their families and diligent in their work. It stands to reason that such people should be very popular, but why are many honest people very unpopular in the workplace?

Some scholars believe that there are mainly the following reasons:

1, honest people will not come to work, let alone cater to the preferences of leaders.

We know, but everyone likes to hear good things, especially most bosses and leaders in the workplace. They like to listen to compliments and good words from employees. However, honest people can only work silently, not only can't kiss up to others, but also can't read minds. Therefore, even if they work hard, it is difficult to impress the leaders.

2. Honest people are too honest.

Honest people are too honest, speak directly, don't express tactfully, and sometimes do bad things with kindness. Some people say that honesty is also a disadvantage? Admittedly, honesty is a good quality, but in most workplaces, being too honest is easy to arouse some people's disgust.

Especially those who have done harm to the interests of the company will be offended if honest people don't speak tactfully enough and don't expose them honestly.

Honest people don't like to join in the fun and disturb others.

Honest people have a strong sense of family. They work diligently and go home to accompany their families after work. Don't like chatting, eating and fighting at work; Not used to the gathering between colleagues in the unit; I also like to bury my head in research when I encounter problems, and I don't like to ask my colleagues for help. In the long run, honest people give people a feeling that they are not close, and it is difficult to integrate into the group of the unit.

4, the unit competition is fierce.

Some units advocate the western law of the jungle, and the competition is fierce.

The law of the jungle is the law of the jungle. Compared with more powerful and scheming competitors, honest colleagues are their first choice for crowding out. Of course I won't make friends with them.

To sum up, some scholars believe that the main reason for the poor popularity of honest people in the workplace is their low emotional intelligence, and they don't care about the influence of "communication and interaction".

This is their only shortcoming. In addition, there are many bright spots in honest people. If they meet a friendly team composed of high-quality leaders and colleagues, they are likely to become the beacon of the unit.

However, such companies and teams are rare. In the big environment, if an honest person can change his communication style, pay attention to cultivating his ability to communicate with others, and add his excellent quality, he will certainly become a very popular person in the workplace.

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Since it is called the workplace, it is essential to deal with people. Therefore, contacts can be an important resource in the workplace. We look at people by moral standards, and honest people are of course popular with everyone. But by workplace standards, honest people are not so optimistic.

Honest people may be useless. An honest man with a dull head probably has no outstanding skills. For example, if you have outstanding expertise in a certain technology, you must have a strong spirit of innovation. Such a person will not be honest and may be crazy. Don't we often see the learnable madman who blew up the laboratory on TV? If you love running, basketball, or playing ball and singing, and often appear on the sports ground and stage, such people will not be honest. The so-called honest people are mostly people who don't like to talk much, don't like to show much, and do their jobs in a down-to-earth manner. There may be an intersection with such people at work, but I'm afraid there is nothing in life and entertainment.

The material society is very realistic. No one wants to spend time catering to a useless person. In real life, what everyone needs is mutual benefit.

Honest people may be poor. Because you are honest, you are not black, and you are law-abiding and not illegal. An honest man is the kind of person who never runs a red light and often queues up and doesn't cut in line. Such people are good subordinates, but not necessarily good partners. Honest people with rules are boring and of no use. It's even hard to find a few friends to talk to. Not to mention someone sticking his nose in both directions.

Of course, we don't have to feel that we have lost anything because of honesty. Exquisite is a living method, quiet is a living method, and honesty is also a living method.

As for which is better, only God knows.

Honest people are filial, obedient and even cowardly. Not good at words, not many friends; Not good at the world, people are not likable; It is easy to make mistakes, and if you are not careful, you will offend people.

Times are changing and developing, especially in the workplace. In the infighting, honest people can easily become the punching bag of some people. Although they work hard, they seldom get the understanding and help of their colleagues' leaders, so they are obscure and clumsy.

Honest people can be friends in life, but too honest people will suffer in the workplace and have poor popularity. Last year, our company recruited a new employee, who was a little fat and short. At first glance, he is so honest that he will do whatever he is told. He communicated softly in his work, making his leading colleagues talk nonstop, and sometimes he couldn't even let go of his fart, and his attitude was arrogant. Regardless of the willy-nilly, leading colleagues are very uncomfortable, and many colleagues in the department are unwilling to take a reason.

First, poor communication makes them seem out of place in the work team.

In the work team, everyone should play their respective roles. In the face of problems, everyone needs to use their imagination to put forward opinions, methods and solutions to help the team deal with various problems. Honest people are not good at words, and they can't express their ideas effectively in the team, or even remain silent. After a long time, it will naturally be excluded by other colleagues, or in the communication with colleagues, it will be lovers, self-defeating or even worse.

Second, I can't perceive words. I don't know the world.

Honest people don't know the way of the world in the workplace, and it is easy to offend people without knowing it if they are not careful. When dealing with colleagues at work, everyone will be a little fidgety, while honest people will walk back and forth in a hurry, which will make colleagues bored.

Honest people don't know what to say, what not to say and what to say in the workplace. Sometimes when reporting to the leader, I will tell the whole story regardless of my colleagues' face, which will make my colleagues lose face, or under the coercion of the leader, there will be cases of tattletale.

Third, it is easy to be stupid, and no one can twist it.

Honest people are prone to make mistakes in their work, and their heads can't turn around. Others can't understand what they say. Even if a colleague tells the truth, he thinks he is right. Even when he was stupid, he went his own way, and ten cows could not be pulled back, deviating from the right track and going further and further. Colleagues kindly advise and ignore them, making colleagues feel uncomfortable and unable to stop.

People can be honest, eat a mat to gain wisdom and make appropriate changes to adapt to the workplace. Most people's honesty is due to their family and childhood experiences, which is understandable, but the society is complex, and if they want to have a place in the workplace, they must change it appropriately.

First, let go of communication, boldly express your feelings and put forward your own ideas and opinions.

In the work with colleagues, learn to relax, speak your mind as boldly as possible when dealing with problems, ask if you don't understand, don't be afraid of making mistakes, don't be afraid of leading colleagues, give more advice and help to the team, and don't try again and again. Once recognized, you will gradually integrate into the collective team, gain recognition and enhance your popularity in the workplace.

Learn to express your inner feelings with colleagues, get along with colleagues sincerely, learn to joke, chat with colleagues occasionally and make some harmless jokes. Don't worry, take your time and let your colleagues accept you slowly.

Second, learn to think from the perspective of others and be tactful.

You should learn to understand others, understand the personality and temper of your colleagues, and think about some problems from their perspective. Don't disturb others silently when they need to think alone. If you have an idea, you should first believe it seriously, at least tell the truth, and then share your own solution to convince people, but you also need to pay attention to your way of speaking, be tactful, lower your profile and ask your colleagues if this method is right. Modesty never hurts.

At work, according to the actual situation, learn to do things tactfully, communicate occasionally, don't be eager to show your attitude, think twice before you act, don't be stingy with praise, praise colleagues more and give affirmation. More or less, we should learn to be smart, use a dozen inner abacus, be honest and be tactful.

Third, don't be too stubborn. You don't have to argue about my right or wrong.

You should learn to listen to other people's ideas and opinions, analyze your own ideas according to the actual situation, admit and correct your mistakes in time, thank others politely, and don't argue too much with your colleagues when you are right. Listen to the ideas of colleagues and leaders, try to figure out other people's ideas and learn from each other's strengths.

In the workplace, it is best not to be too honest, and strive to be a smart and honest person in order to shine better in the workplace.

If you are a real honest man, your popularity is poor, which means that the workplace environment is not pure enough.

First, the concept of honest people

The concept of honest man should be the embodiment of integrity, hard work, hard work, persistence in justice and nothing. Not good? Isn't this the person our unit and society need? On the contrary, some people defiled the concept of honest people and said that they would not be flexible. In fact, contrary to the honest people in society and units, they are inflexible, but opportunistic, narrow-minded speculators who violate laws and regulations in disguise.

Second, I hope that society will not defile and desecrate the concept of honest people. Just like that young lady, they are all positive energy words, but later they are all used for prostitution and obscenity. Up to now, although Chinese is so rich, I can't find a nickname for young girls.

Third, people who run counter to honest people should stop playing tricks. Rent-seeking is illegal, connections and cleverness are synonymous with China people's flexibility. Now many corruption cases are mostly flexible. Therefore, the media should promote righteousness, not right and wrong.

The poor popularity of honest people is related to their own characteristics.

Let's look at the popular features. The essence of interpersonal communication is reciprocity. People who are popular are very good at exchanging values, that is, helping each other. After a long time, people's feelings will be deeper in mutual assistance.

It is said that people with good popularity have one characteristic, and they like to ask others for help. Because you ask others for help, others are equivalent to investing in you and playing the image of a good person. He will continue to help you in order to maintain the image of a good person. In this way, the time is up and the relationship is very good.

The biggest feature of an honest man is that he only cares about his own affairs and is willing to ask others for help. Because he doesn't want to associate, fewer and fewer people associate with him.

Some people have a bad relationship with their leaders, and professionals will advise them to ask their leaders for help. In fact, after they asked the leaders for help, their relationship eased a lot. Therefore, if you want to be popular, you must take the initiative to go out, whether it is to help others or ask others for help, and let people interact with each other through things.

Why do some honest people have poor popularity in the workplace? The answer is that honest people like to use "passive attack" to express their anger.

Recently, everyone watched the variety show "Braving the Wind and Waves". In the "Erebati" group of seven people, the captain gave us a vivid demonstration of what is the passive attack of "honest people".

Of all the teams, Erebati is the most chaotic one. Dingdong sang very well and was recommended as the captain by everyone. But Eva Huang, Liu Yun and others never stopped her and always questioned her decision.

If you are a strong and skilled person, you may still stay where you are. However, Dingdang is what we often call a "good guy", who flinches when questioned and is easily influenced by emotions.

When interrupted by other sisters, I could clearly feel that Ding Dong was in a bad mood. But when someone asked, she said it didn't matter and refused to express her inner feelings. This is actually a kind of "passive attack". I won't take the initiative to say that XXX is bad, but I can release my anger in a passive and negative way.

But to be honest, it is difficult for members of the group "Erebati" to choose a boss with leadership. Because everyone has too much personality. So Ding Dong's passive attack is actually a helpless move.

If you really meet such a team in the workplace, I suggest you leave first, because you can't afford it.

Let's talk about honest people in the workplace. Why aren't they likable?

Because although they are pleasing on the surface, they will express their feelings to the outside world, which is too negative and closed. How to release anger with nowhere to put it?

They will get angry because of small things, so they lack intimate friends and can't handle the relationship with their families well.

In The Lovely Curse, there is such an example.

Hamish, who works in IT, is regarded as a "lovely man" by everyone. He is responsive, always smiling, and everyone loves him! However, he often struggles with the inner darkness. Sometimes, a little thing will make him lose control of his emotions; More often, he likes to treat close people with irony and sarcasm.

His depression not only made him miserable, but also made his wife mistakenly think that he was cheating, especially when he responded enthusiastically to all his female colleagues, his doubts became deeper and deeper.

Psychologist william james once said that the deepest human need is the feeling of being appreciated by others.

Disappeared "good people" hide all their grievances in their hearts, unable to express their true feelings, which will make people afraid to approach.

An honest man has always been an active officer in the unit, working hard and not used to watching words and deeds.

Honest people only know how to jump down and do things, always thinking about how to do the work better. They don't know have it both ways, don't "come to work" and don't cater to the preferences of leaders. If leaders don't pay attention to it, honest people will never have a chance of promotion.

An honest man pretends that the work of his unit is only for Dont Ask For Help, and he won't form a gang and intrigue with anyone. Honest people are independent individuals, so honest people have no good "popularity".

Honest people, loyal to a "cell" of the unit, treat honest people well, and the unit will develop more sunshine.

Thinking: Why is your popularity poor? Essentially, it's because you are too honest!

Everyone will habitually think that honest people are likable and popular, but is this really the case? Of course not. On the contrary, honest people in the workplace are often not very popular. Why is there such a strange phenomenon, which is so different from what everyone thinks? There are three main reasons. I hope you don't have this problem in the workplace.

0 1, when communicating with others, the so-called honest people who don't know how to be tactful usually have such a label, that is, when communicating with others, they like to tell the truth and say what they have to say directly, and they won't think of some words. Although they are good for each other, they will also hurt each other's self-esteem, for example. These are all words that honest people don't know how to be tactful when communicating with others, causing others to resent.

Especially in the workplace, colleagues don't get along like family, classmates and friends, because not everyone knows that you are like family and friends, and not everyone is broad-minded enough to laugh at your words. In the company, most colleagues are very polite to you, but because you speak too tactlessly and hit too hard, others don't like to get along with you secretly. Therefore, why are honest people kind-hearted but poor in popularity? This is caused by Liu.

02. When communicating with people, it is easy to feel inferior. Most honest people feel inferior. It is precisely because of this mentality that these honest people can easily leave a bad impression on others in the process of communication, thus causing the most fundamental reason for their bad popularity. As we all know, when people meet and talk for the first time, the first impression they give others will leave a long-term stubborn sense of substitution in people's minds. That is to say, when they meet and talk for the first time, they fail to leave a good impression, so this bad thing will always be deeply rooted in others' minds, and it will be difficult to change it no matter how much time and energy you spend in the future.

Therefore, this is the easiest thing for honest people to suffer. Because of their inferiority, when communicating with strangers, they always think that they are not doing well enough, and then whatever they say and do will give others a stingy impression. Especially in the workplace, honest people often suffer in this respect when dealing with leaders or social people. So honest people are very good, but it doesn't mean good popularity. This is the main reason.

Another reason why honest people who dare not offend people are not popular is that they dare not offend people. Seeing this, you may say, you shouldn't be a popular person unless you offend others? In fact, this is wrong, because in the workplace, if a person does not dare to offend anyone, then he will leave a bad image in the eyes of his colleagues. In the company, I believe that people in power generally don't like to associate with them, because such people may talk to you with a smile in front of you today, but in the blink of an eye, they will talk about your business in your competitors! Therefore, the honest man's fear of offending people is also one of the main reasons why he is unpopular in the company.

To sum up: the three main reasons for the poor popularity of honest people are mentioned above.

Then, when you know the reason, it will be much easier to change and become a person that everyone likes and enjoys.

1 For example, when communicating with people, don't be too straight, and sometimes be tactful when appropriate, then others will naturally get along with you happily;

2. For example, when communicating with strangers, we should establish self-confidence and give others a strong, confident and organized image, which will naturally leave a good impression on others;

3, for example, whether in life or in the workplace, don't be afraid of things, but don't make trouble, but also have your own opinions, don't be a swing, so naturally others will respect you.

As long as these are done well, popularity will naturally be good and interpersonal relationships will naturally grow.