Crosstalk jokes about campus

My girlfriend (crosstalk) A: Let me ask you a question. B: Who do you love the most in the world? B: Apart from my mother, my girlfriend, of course. A: Do you have a girlfriend? B: Not yet. A: What are you talking about? A: Yes, B: Do you love her? Yes, she is my favorite person in the world. B: I love my girlfriend as much as you love your girlfriend. A: Bah, that girlfriend is mine. B: For example, why aren't you so angry? A: It's strange not to be angry. I see you alone every day. Do you know what my classmates say about you? B: Tell me about me. A: Well, B: Me? Why? A: Say you are full of treasures. Really? A: Let's talk about the day before yesterday. What did you say, camera? What did you say to the boss who sells cameras? Boss, I want cash. A: That's it. I want cash. The boss is thinking, are you here to rob? B: that's because he heard wrong. I mean, cash, cash, cash, camera, camera, cash, camera, cash, camera, camera. Look at me, how fluent I speak. How many words did you just say about cash? B: I didn't say cash just now I mean camera, camera, camera. You see, you heard wrong again. A: Well, I heard it wrong this time, but the fact that you are covered in treasures will not change. B: Why? A: Just say yesterday. Yesterday, what did I say yesterday? Xiao Zhang came to our dormitory. What did you ask? Just say it, Xiao Zhang. How many children are there in your family? Let me ask you, is Xiao Zhang married? If you want to ask how many brothers there are in his family, just ask Teacher Zhang, how many brothers are there in your family? Just ask. Do you want to show your sense of humor? I don't think so at all A: Prove that your sense of humor is innate. B: Just ask him how many children there are at home. Look, here we go again. No. How many brothers are there in your family? A: Isn't that enough? But, I said, A, what's good for them? A: There are many benefits. Talking and laughing, being happy, smiling, being young, upset and losing your head are the most useful. B: girlfriend, does this work? A: Effective. You know, girls really want boys to be funny. B: Why A: Because girls love to laugh. B: Why do girls like to laugh? B: because boys like to watch it. B: Why do boys like to watch it? A: Because girls look good when they smile. B: Why didn't I realize that although male compatriots are often dormitories, it doesn't mean anything. A: You don't understand this because you don't have a girlfriend yet. B: Is the girlfriend's magic really so great? A: That sentence, B: That sentence A: Girls in love are the most beautiful. B: What about boys in love? A: This is the worst. B: Ah! ? A: You don't know. I go shopping with my girlfriend almost every day to buy clothes and watch movies. The most painful thing is that she wants me to tell a joke every day to make her happy. She's ridiculous. A: No way. I love her. You are so stupid. A: Not stupid, but love. Love, do you understand? B: What jokes do you usually tell your girlfriend? A: A robber saw a cow grazing on the roadside and stood there for a long time. Later, a thief came and asked you why you didn't take the cow away. The robber said: B: Say what A: I told you, I am a robber by profession, how can I be a thief? Stealing is not what robbers should do. B: ... A: I told you, it's no use. You don't have a girlfriend. B: There is nothing to be proud of. I have a lot of armor at home. B: Yes, what small fish, light rain and small flowers? Do they all live in your house? B: Of course, they all live in my fish tank for the time being. I took you to see their graceful, potbellied bodies and red skin for a long time. What fascinates you most is those big watery eyes. Think about it, how wonderful. Why? It sounds like a mermaid. You heard wrong. I said goldfish. You know this is a goldfish. I am talking about people. Do you have a girlfriend who likes someone? Well, not yet. A: Well, you don't have it now. B: (scratching his head) A: But not having a girlfriend is a happy thing. B: Why? A: Because you haven't suffered in this respect. B: Oh, A: But having a girlfriend is also a happy thing. B: Why? A: Because you haven't tasted the sweetness in this respect. I see. I see. A: You will understand? Do you really understand B: I saw a hero begging his girlfriend to open the door on TV, and that was bitterness. Then the hero said, honey, open the door. It's all my fault. A: The heroine said: It's no use knowing you're wrong. Let's break up. B: The hero shouted: Great. The heroine opened the door in a rage. B: After the hero went in, he begged on his knees. A: what happened later? B: Didn't the hero and heroine just kiss (making a blind date gesture with both hands)? It's sweet. A: I've had the same experience. B: Really? A: Of course. But we are the opposite. I'm in my room and my girlfriend is outside the door. B: A: Well, it rained heavily that day, and my girlfriend's clothes got wet. She said outside the door, honey, will you open the door? Why don't you just open the door? A: No, if I open the door and let her see a woman in my room, she will misunderstand, so I said, I have something urgent to open later. B: Why did you say that I was in a hurry and your girlfriend would guess? You don't know, nowadays, women are full of imagination and can't think of anything seriously. At that time, that woman called my nickname: Jony J, my girlfriend outside the door soon became super gentle and her voice became very sweet. Finally, I opened the door. I was fascinated by the sound. A: Well, did your girlfriend break up after meeting that woman? A: Think about it. My girlfriend saw it and did it quickly. (Bends over) B: I said you two had a long chat. Isn't it your ugly daughter-in-law who met her mother A: Do you feel annoyed with having a girlfriend? B: But is it better this way? A: Then don't be so sad, girlfriend. It's just whether you want it or not. Do you have that heart problem? B: Then how did you catch up with your girlfriend A: Me? Do you want to hear the worst trick or the real trick? B: Let's listen to the worst trick first. A: Under her dormitory, she plays the guitar. B: Aren't you afraid of someone throwing water from upstairs? A: I will flash back. If someone hits me, will you have a reason not to flash? B: That's right. This is the real trick. A: There is water splashing upstairs. Don't flash. B: no flashing? A: Yes, girls are so caring. When you are splashed with water, she will come down soon. Oh, I see. This is a bitter pill. 、