Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - I only have a few dollars in my pocket all year round.
I only have a few dollars in my pocket all year round.
I just coughed up a mouthful of phlegm and was ready to vomit, but I was very hungry and swallowed it again.
Be careful when you walk across the lawn. Don't step on the soil I want to eat this month.
Sleep late at night, so you don't have to eat after a day's sleep.
What I smoke depends on what cigarette you throw.
6. Looking forward to a good year, T-shirts are patched like jackets.
7. Grind bones and moisten intestines.
8. I'm not afraid of catching fire at home, but I'm afraid of falling into the gutter. There is nothing but what you are wearing.
9. I sat on the toilet for a week because I was poor and had my period.
10. I'm too hungry to sleep. I wish I had this.
The thieves were crying when they came out of my house.
12. I ate all the soil in my motherland!
13. Facts have proved that lack of money and love are the most difficult things in this world. ...
14. The weather forecast says there is no wind today, so it seems that we will be hungry again.
15. In the evening, I said to the mouse in the kitchen: Don't look, only we can eat at home.
16. For the unborn four-legged gold eater, I may eat the soil voluntarily.
17. I was so poor that even my mouse moved away crying.
18. If there were no free air, I wouldn't be alive now.
19. I ate it last month, dog ate it, dog ate it, I ate it.
20. After the rain, the soil is softer and more fragrant, but it is a little sticky, and overall it is OK.
2 1. Go to sleep, there is everything you want in your dream.
I don't call myself poor, I call myself a price-sensitive consumer.
23. Just kidding, how can I let you go? It's too late for me to kill you.
24. Finding the surprise of money in the pocket of clothes and trousers that I haven't worn for a long time can make me feel high. ...
25. I am a fool, a scum, a funny state, no money, no appearance, no height, no object.
26. When I was a child, I had no money at home, and I kept flying kites with a rope and a plastic bag. blue sky
27. The operation is as fierce as a tiger, and you will eat dirt as soon as you turn around.
28. I want to get rich, too. So I don't have to worry about money. I also have free time to do what I want.
29. I refuse to participate in activities that cost more than a dime.
30. Girls like us who have no money and are not beautiful can only be kind.
3 1. Being short of money, I really hate you two!
32. Customer: "How much is a catty of fish?" Boss: "This is 8 yuan a catty." Customer: "How did this fish die?" Boss: "Nobody is angry."
33. Everyone said: Let nature take its course. Well, can you settle down if you have no money? That's hard to move!
34. Attendant: Hello, you always spend XX yuan. Do you want to pay in cash or by credit card? Me: Can I wash the dishes?
35. Forget it, this dress doesn't suit me.
36. Those who have money are brushing Taobao, while those who have no money are brushing Weibo.
37. The carpenter doesn't have a stool to sit on at home, so he sells oil lady water to comb her hair.
38. What I smoke depends on what cigarette butts others throw.
39. The valley folds money, the money folds the valley, and a stone is borrowed to die.
40. In the future, you will definitely appreciate your present efforts.
4 1. Helpers don't make money, so their bellies are round.
42. Don't call me arrogant, I refuse to deal with animals!
There are few dollars in my pocket all the year round. 43. You don't have to go to the toilet if you can, for fear that you will be hungry faster!
44. Be happy for two hours and eat dirt for a month. I'm going to eat dirt.
45. robbing Peter to pay Paul ended up living in a shabby house.
46. Dogs eat pig manure just to be hungry.
47. Hungry, I want to eat meat, hot pot, fish with Chinese sauerkraut and hot and sour powder. The more I think about it, the hungrier I get. This is a vicious circle.
48. I dare not type with symbols for fear of wasting traffic.
49. I usually hide the meat between my teeth so as not to dig it out when I want to eat it.
50. You don't know me in junior high school, so you don't know. Actually, I've restrained myself a lot now.
5 1. Please help me order a lot.
52. Starting from today, don't call me for activities other than eating in 5 yuan. I have no money, I'm going to eat dirt!
53. The beggar shook his bowl at me. I think he is showing off his wealth to me.
54. All the bad emotions come from exams, gaining weight, lacking money and having no partner!
55. There are five people in our family. Give them a band-aid when they sleep.
56. I can't solve anything that money can solve.
57. The poor know their sufferings, and the poor see their relatives.
58. The lady who sells oil combs her hair with water, and the lady who sells fans covers her head with her hands.
59. The so-called holiday means being suspected of going out without money at home.
60. I am short of money recently, so I want to call the school and ask them to refund some tuition fees. I can't give them money for nothing!
6 1. If you can't go to the toilet, you won't go to the toilet, lest you be hungry faster! silence is golden. Don't talk to me. I want to save money.
62. Being wronged, I dare not resign.
My girlfriend is in a bad mood. Try to make her happy.
My girlfriend is in a bad mood. Try to make her happy. I seem to have lost the ability to love others. Meeting you is probably the reason for this loss of ability!
You filled my life with love and tears. ...
Your words have been locked in my memory. You can keep the key for me all my life.
Maybe I don't have the hot love like the sun, and I don't have the long love like running water. I only know that I have always loved you and tried my best for you.
I think I will accompany you to the market every day in the future.
I swear, after many years, I still love you as I do now.
7. If life deceives you, don't complain, hug me.
I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you. Happy birthday to myself.
9. Sooner or later, it is good to meet you; No matter whether it rains or blows, just hold your hand; More or less, it is good that you can care about me; Bitter or happy, as long as we are together. Honey, you are fine, and it will clear up.
10. Don't look at the ups and downs of the world coldly, give each other the energy of happiness. You are the charming lang in my old dream, and the waves after loving you push the waves before. Today, many years later, this feeling is still lingering!
1 1. Holding you is the first thing you want, but kissing you is thoughtful!
12. Only you know my world.
13. My thoughts evaporated into clouds, and then it rained, but I couldn't bear to get wet.
14. I won't allow you to go alone at night, because I will never let you go alone!
15. Whenever you need me, I will come at once and do my best for you.
16. Dear, my love for you will last forever until the seas run dry and the rocks crumble; I am more like a mountain without edges and corners to you; My love for you, even if the news broadcast is over, I will always love you and stay in your heart forever.
17. At the wrong time and place, everything will be right as long as you meet the right person.
18. I think I will accompany you to the market every day in the future.
19. When you are depressed, I am your pistachio. When you are sad, I would like to be your sad tree!
20. The room in my heart is for you to live in.
2 1. I want to grow old with you.
My girlfriend is in a bad mood. Try to make her happy. I thought I could be strong without you, and finally I knew I couldn't.
23. Please cherish every opportunity you have and seize every moment that belongs to you! ! I will always belong to you! Miss you, my love!
24. I'm going to sleep, because my dreams are full of you.
25. Only you know my world.
26. After a long time, I will get tired of everything except loving you.
27. I really didn't expect you to be so sad. Excuse me!
28. You always ask me what I like about you and why I like you. I just like you, like your eyes, like your mouth, like your ears, like your cheeks, like your outline, like yours, as long as it is yours, I like it. I like you for no reason or reason, just like the earth goes around the sun, which is what it is.
29. People with feelings, every day is a holiday. A reminder, a handed note; A lovesickness, looking forward to it with one heart; A love, a love for life!
30. If possible, I would like to spend every moment of my life with you.
3 1. I won't let you drink, not that I won't let you drink. Drinking less will hurt your health!
32. You are my first and last love.
Let's go together. One hand can't carry the luggage. From now on, I am your left hand.
34. Let me tell you what love is without words.
35. My love is open for you, like white lightning breaking the sky; My love runs for you, like red blood filling my body. ...
36. Bind you with warm hugs, bind you with infinite thoughts, melt you with real tenderness, stay with you with deep love, love you all your life, love you with the most sincerity, and have no regrets in this life!
37. I love you, even the mountain wind, the small fish in the water and the birds in the sky.
38. What I admire most is not being chased by many people, but meeting someone who will never give up on you anyway. Even though I know that life will not be so easy, I hope you will be in my future and you will be my life.
39. I was wrong. As long as there is a contradiction between us, it's all my fault.
40. Why did you hurt me and make me like you so much?
4 1. At this moment, I wake up every day and see your smile shining on the wall like sunshine. I really want to wake up one day, and the first thing I touch is your real flower-like sweet sleep.
42. It has nothing to do with romance. I just don't think I can miss you anyway.
If I can, I would like to spend every minute of my life with you.
44. Baby, I was wrong. Forgive me, okay? Come back to me, I will build a love nest for you, always warm you, care for you and protect you!
45. Who can say for sure? It may be the first time I met you, it may be the first time you smiled at me, or it may be the time when you studied hard.
46. A few bottles of beer and two lines of nonsense. If you listen carefully, every word is I miss you.
47. I like you, your eyebrows and your temper, not you.
No matter what you think, remember that I love you forever.
49. I am willing to spend 10 million years waiting for you to smile like the warm sun in early spring.
50. Falling in love with you is a kind of sweetness, falling in love with you is a kind of romance, hugging you is a kind of happiness, and keeping you is a kind of happiness, dear, because I love you, everything is full of beauty, and I love you for ten thousand years!
5 1. What you see is the real me! Never-ending touching! Touching the world, you and I are the most beautiful beings!
52. My dream is to realize all your wishes.
I won't love you forever, until the day you die. I will love you forever until the second I die.
54. You are so tacky that you always send your own selfie photos. Just seeing you makes my hands ache.
If you like this kind of thing, cover your mouth and it will come out of your eyes.
I miss you very much at the moment. Please take good care of yourself for me.
57. I can't live without you in my love world.
58. I am willing to love you, take care of you and protect you all my life.
I don't know what will happen tomorrow, so we should cherish the time together now. If I can influence the future, then I hope I can be with you forever!
60. Come and go in a hurry, leaving behind thousands of sorrows, looking forward to meeting you again.
6 1. I never want to be rich. Being able to walk quietly through all the spring, summer, autumn and winter of my life with the people I love is my only greatest luxury.
62. You are the one who has always supported me in my most difficult time!
Describe good luck and a happy mood.
Describe good luck. Say the sentence happily (the first part) 1. Good luck refers to good things that happen suddenly or unexpectedly.
Life is over half this year, and it has been going downhill for half a year. I can't believe the evil spirits in "Everyone is Happy". I hope fortune telling can bring me good luck.
I won't say those colorful words, I only know that meeting you is the luckiest thing in my life.
I made a big decision today. I hope I'm lucky!
I have always believed that good people will be rewarded, and I still believe it now.
No matter how long we haven't met, we will still miss you often.
7. You told me that you were lucky to see the once-in-a-century blood moon. But you know, meeting you among 7 billion people is my lucky life.
8. What a lucky woman, I didn't know she missed someone who loved her so much; What an unfortunate woman, she will never know that someone in this world once loved her so much. -Tonghua
9. God bless the people
10. Birthdays are like this every year. Today is a calm day, I wish myself good luck tomorrow.
1 1. It is my greatest luck to meet so many people who are willing to help me! After listening to the class all night, I woke up on my own today! Good luck to everyone and yourself!
12. Don't wait for luck, but try to master knowledge. -Fleming
13. While congratulating myself on my luck, I feel guilty and ashamed of my luck.
14. Spring comes early and good luck comes. Flowers bloom to you and birds smile at you. Happy events surround you and cover you. Friends say hello. Life is better. Good luck and happiness!
15. It's really lucky that I didn't receive the ticket this year.
16. People who meet the sunshine will feel warm in their hearts.
17. We are like lovers who live far apart from each other. Occasionally, we feel confused about our fate. More often, we express our thoughts and passionate courage on the phone with invisible lines.
18. You will eventually become the joy of the limited edition of the universe.
19. It turns out that everything in fate has its own arrangement. Where to go, where to stay, what kind of people to meet and what kind of words to hear are all arranged by fate. Walking alone, just to walk ahead, there is such a harvest!
20. What should have happened still happened! Wish yourself good luck!
2 1. Tomorrow, I hope I will take my brain, stay awake, finish the exam, come on, come on, and wish myself good luck.
22. Maybe the ultimate happiness has nothing to do with the person in my heart. Maybe one day, we will hold a person's hand and see through the scenery of our life.
23. Lucky people need faith in order not to be too proud, unhappy people need support, and unfortunate people don't give in. -Hong Baode
24. It is depressing to think of the full schedule from this afternoon to Wednesday. Wish yourself good luck.
25. Vultures fly and aim at all directions; Feng Huangwen is finished. Good luck now.
26. The spring breeze gently blows the willows, the moonlight is as thick as wine, and the flu has been raging for too long. I don't know if you are okay, don't wander around and wash your hands without disinfection. I wish you health and permanence!
27. When an eagle grows up in a henhouse, it will lose its ability to fly. When a wild wolf grows up in a flock, he will fall in love with a sheep and lose his wolf nature.
28. You know, in this unlucky year, meeting you is my best luck.
29. I suffer from injections and medicine. I can't go out without taste. I can understand my feelings. I wish you a recovery!
30. Believe in yourself. They are not conceited. Lucky people believe that each of us has great strength inside, and this resilience can make us achieve great success.
3 1. The world of flowers and flowers is flourishing everywhere. How lucky I am to meet you.
32. Good luck celebrates new happiness, and all blessings celebrate the New Year; How happy it is to get together; Congratulations on getting rich and good luck.
33. June is almost over. I am looking forward to July. Let bad luck go, good luck is coming!
34. The less kind people are, the less good luck they have. I feel childish and fair.
35. I may be lucky. I know that there are not many satisfactory love, and all kinds of opportunities are needed. I just think that we shouldn't take it out on that dream because the reality is not satisfied and say it doesn't exist. If people have no dreams, they will be blind at night. Shi Tiesheng
36. Sometimes, the right person will only meet at the wrong stop. The so-called luck is just silently doodling all the misfortunes and leaving the best for others to see. The cold wind in winter can't freeze the shirts that have been dried.
37. Between square inches, a caring heart; In time and space, I often miss you; It's a bosom friend, and sincere wishes are like gold; Good friend, I wish you good luck forever!
38. There are no windtight walls and no hanging beams.
39. Don't look for me if you have nothing to do, and don't look for me if you have anything to do.
40. I have traveled all over Qian Shan, but I still can't get out of your eyebrows.
4 1. I wish you good luck, good health and a happy new year.
42. Meeting you exhausted my life's luck, so I didn't have a chance to accompany you.
Describe good luck and have a good chat (Part III) 43. There are several kinds of good luck in life, one is to do what you love, and the other is to be with the person you love. To realize these wishes depends partly on luck and partly on diligence. No matter how good the fortune is, if you don't work hard, the good luck will gradually fade away; Those who are no longer lucky, if they are diligent enough, will meet the god of luck one day.
44. Friend, meeting you is the luck of my life. If one day I can't hold an umbrella for you, I will accompany you in the rain.
45. Prosperous career
46. I like us best. We always make up in the end.
47. Fate can crush us in two ways-refusing our wishes or satisfying them.
48. The world is actually evil. It's actually lucky to meet people who are kind to you, and it's normal to meet bad people. So, lucky!
49. A woman redder than a red diamond falls in love with a man yellower than a yellow diamond. Finally, a mistress who is greener than a green diamond came and gave birth to a son called a member.
50. Good love makes you see the world through one person, while bad love makes you abandon the world for one person.
5 1. Always treat life positively. When you are depressed, you are weak. When you dare to declare war on your destiny and take control of your own destiny, you can become the master of life.
52. I also had a confused moment of "I can do anything for her smile". Fortunately, she didn't ask me to do anything at that moment. It turns out that the end has always been lucky.
53. May dreams become the beacon of the earth, and may blessings become the longest river.
54. The luckiest thing in this world is to meet your favorite person at my favorite age.
The city is so big and there are so many passers-by, but I met you and fell in love with you. Whether we are together or apart in the future, it is my luck.
56. There is a museum in the mountain. She wanted to stay on the island for the time being, but fate left her behind.
A woman remarried because she hated her ex-husband. A man remarried because he loved his ex-wife Women try their luck, men try their luck. Oscar Wilde
58. Fortunately, the person you like likes you.
59. Fate not only blinds itself, but also blinds the people I love most.
60. Assuming that your life has a certain inevitability, all your actions will inevitably push you to that point in time-including your resistance, which will also become your driving force-I think this is fate.
6 1. It is said that girls who love to laugh are not bad luck. I hope good luck will come soon, which will rekindle my hope and make me laugh impudently.
62. I hope everything goes well and good luck will follow.
The most interesting wechat pats the copy of 62 sentences.
Take a copybook on the most interesting WeChat-1. You patted "lovely wife's face and said I love you".
2. I patted my resume and said, that's awesome.
3. You patted "handsome guy's abdominal muscles say I can"
4. I patted my mansion and accidentally collapsed.
5. I patted my shower gel and blew bubbles.
6. Pat my limited edition Ferrari.
7. Pat my window, Dickie Pill.
8. "Pat the elm on the head"
9. Pat my fragrance and eat a catty.
10. Sue was scared and cried.
1 1. "Pat my homework and help me write"
12. Pat my quilt and get in.
13. Shi Sheng beauty, carried away by beauty.
14. patted my fairy aura.
Patek Philippe of 15.
16. The wallet said that it would support me for life.
17. Pat me on the head and say I want to grow up quickly.
18. Patted my back seat and said to take me home.
19. patted my conscience, oh, no.
20. Patted my head but didn't touch my hair.
2 1. You clap your conscience. Aha? not have
The most interesting wechat pat copybook. 22. patted my car and said it was impossible to work.
23. little ass said: It's really awkward.
24. "Slapping bricks shows that you are timid."
25. My shoulder said, going to climb the mountain?
26. Pat me on the waist and say you are so beautiful.
27. "Pat me on the stomach"
28. Open the login WeChat on your mobile phone.
29. Pat my Ferrari to show my envy.
30. I patted my castle door, but I was driven away.
3 1. Pat my crown and say good night to the princess.
32. You patted "Get out"
33. I patted my chest hair and my mouth watered.
34. Pat my bulging wallet.
35. Pat me on the back. Congratulations to me.
36. My feet smell it affectionately.
37. The ashtray is drunk.
38. "Pat my husband+the person I like"
39. Patted my leader and said, fire me.
40. Then hug your thighs.
4 1. You (a friend) patted "ex-boyfriend's grave and said" Have a good trip ".
42. "It's drooling to shoot eight abdominal muscles."
Take a copy of the most interesting WeChat. Patted XX on the shoulder and said, Dad, you have worked hard.
44. There is obviously no burn on the forehead.
45. My hand says: Snacks are for you.
46. patted the tight vest line
47. Pat your little head.
48. Pat my dog on the head and kick him.
"I patted the old red rope and it broke."
50. "I patted the watermelon and wanted to dig a spoonful."
5 1. "patted my Lamborghini window"
52. Fragile dignity
53. Pat my watermelon and dig a spoonful.
54. Pat my little brain and turn into a pig.
55. I patted little ass, which was really embarrassing.
56. You patted "your own clever brain"
57. Thigh, alas, there is still so much meat.
58. Did you pat my conscience?
59. The waist says: It's so thin.
60. Pat my dog on the head and kick him.
6 1. Patted my ass and said to change my posture.
62. Pat me on the shoulder and miss you, baby.
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