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Medical funny sketch script

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This is a sketch script written before SARS. I don't remember whether it was written for nurses' day or other festivals. Based on real events, describe what happened around you. Although the first draft was written in a hurry, it was revised several times, which is my heart and blood. However, the play was finally cancelled because of "too many negative plots"! ..... This is four years, and times have changed. Since then, I have no impulse to create. Now, I dedicate it to my alma mater and my alumni. I didn't expect it to have the brilliance of the essay Fortune Teller. As long as you can tell me when you use it, you will be satisfied!

Drama: sketch.

Drama: one-act drama.

Role: male, dean of a hospital; Female, Mrs. Dean.

Time: on the eve of typhoon wasp.

Venue: Dean's home.

Scene: (living room) There are two armchairs and a coffee table in the middle of the stage. There is a desk lamp behind the coffee table, a TV set at the front desk with its back to the audience, a door on the left, a long table on the right, and a white background curtain (or windows and curtains).

Script:

Background broadcast: The strong typhoon "Wasp" will land in Yangjiang-Zhanjiang area tonight. Please actively organize anti-wind rescue work. At the same time, the curtain slowly opened and the stage lights gradually lit up. )

Woman: (looking anxious, looking at her watch from time to time, changing channels aimlessly, muttering:) The wind is getting stronger and stronger, so late.

Man: (With a broken bike on his shoulder, he hurried onto the stage, looked up at the sky while walking, gently put down his steps at the door, gently put down his bike and turned to the window for a while, as if to climb the window. )

Woman: (Hearing the door opening, she looked around and pretended to cough. ) oh!

Man: (scared, almost fell down, looked at his wife awkwardly and whispered) I thought you were asleep, so that's it. (loudly) No, I came back as soon as the operation was over. Only on the road, my BMW's front wheel "festered and punctured", and the horse slipped and rolled lazily. Next ... Next, he rode me back, hehe (embarrassed, but casually raised his head and clapped his hands. )

Woman: (with a look of anger and pity, she couldn't help saying:) Don't bring your "patient" into the house. (While helping to lift the car, he said:) You should ride your "classic car" to work, but you can't take a car. Yes! Great, the horse is disabled, and it can replace the car tomorrow!

M: (self-deprecating:) It's good for health, good for health, ...

(The car is carried to the table on the right side of the living room. )

M: (Raise your hands and habitually make a standard preoperative posture. Get ready to go on stage

Woman: What? You have been standing in the operating room for five hours. Aren't you tired? ! Can't you have a rest?

Man: (impatient, urging:) Hurry up! Come on! Come on! It's not like you don't know my temper My work is not finished yet, and I don't even know what it tastes like.

Woman: Ah! You didn't even eat? (painfully stated)

Man: (casually, lightly replied:) Eat! (lowering his voice) lunch!

Woman: You ...! (Not without worry. )

Man: (while burying his head in checking his bike, he was driving like nobody's watching, talking to himself:) Alas, man, you are still "badly hurt"! ..... The front fork is broken, my foot is dislocated, (pulling the wire by hand) Well, some "ribs" are broken, too. Maybe I will get off the stage tonight! (improving intonation) prepare lights and musical instruments!

Woman: (At first glance, she smiled and said helplessly:) You, you! Nothing you can do can stop it.

Man: (Without looking up, he reached to the side and said:) Climbing hands, pliers, screwdriver.

Woman: (Bring the toolbox, hand in the tools, and pull it out with milk and towels. Staring at his face from time to time, endless love. )

Male: (Professional, don't turn your face from time to time to let your wife wipe the sweat and feed the water, and remind you from time to time:) Light up, light up.

W: (Not without worry) Have a rest.

Man: (seriously) Please keep quiet. I continue to bury myself in my work and never seem tired. )

Female: (pa! Turn off the lights and pretend to be angry. )

Man: (suddenly angry and laughing) OK, OK, OK, let's have an elective operation, OK! (Shrugging his shoulders and making a compromise. Sit in the chair on the left side of Taichung, take out a cigarette and make it look like it's on fire. )

Woman: (turning to bring a stack of letters and handing them over, she said:) A man sent these things this afternoon.

Man: (suddenly made a gesture, then flew into a rage and said:) How many times have I told you not to accept any red envelopes? How can you ...?

Woman: (quickly explaining) This letter. ...

Man: (interrupting categorically) I know what's in the envelope! You can't take a penny! (Turn around after kiss xiu, furious. Then he turned to emphasize that) as the president's wife, you ...

Woman: (slowly takes out the letter, praises it in front of him and smiles proudly) Money? ……。

Man: Oh! I ... you ... you read it. I changed my mind, then sat down slowly, listened carefully and thought deeply. )

Woman: this is …, Dr. XXX asked to change his job …

Man: (interrupting categorically:) He ...? ! He described biliary ascaris patients as ectopic pregnancy in outpatient clinic; Upper gastrointestinal bleeding misdiagnosed as gastroenteritis: even more outrageous, male patients have HCG test! We talk about "three stresses" every day, but he plays around. It is a great honor for me to let him stay in the hospital for examination and be transferred from the clinical front line. How dare you ask this and that! ……。

Woman: This is ... the superior leader instructed the hospital to sue the patients who had craniotomy, negotiate out of court and pay compensation.

Man: (angry, not without excitement:) What a shame! The patient suffered from massive intracranial hemorrhage on the left side and drained the lateral ventricle, which completely met the medical regulations! The critically ill notice, preoperative conversation record, and surgical consent form are all available ... The family members are obviously unreasonable! Negotiate out of court, don't you hit yourself in the mouth? Aren't you ignoring the reputation of our hospital? How should I face that kind and wronged good colleague? These leaders! Alas ....., I'm not the dean, and I can't sit idly by! (thoughtfully for a moment, then sat down helplessly, took off his glasses, screwed his eyebrows, and was exhausted. )

Woman: (distressed and concerned) You …, have a good rest, your health is important!

Man: (waving his hand and trying to cheer up) It doesn't matter. Please continue reading. (Leaning back in the chair, listening silently. )

Woman: (shaking his head, sighing) This ... this is an application for further study by a doctor. (Be careful, awkward. )

M: Well, it's fine. Very courageous and promising. Quietly, the sound fades away. I am confused and feel asleep. )

Woman: (I walked over in awe, took the glasses from his hand and looked at his face affectionately. I accidentally noticed that his temples were stained with white hair, and I gently pulled out a white hair, staring at it, and couldn't help but burst into tears. What a man in his early thirties! .....100 (protruding over the forehead, suddenly surprised, losing his voice) It's so hot! (Busy to bring a thermometer, carefully put it in its mouth, anxious. )

Man: (suddenly awakened and vaguely asked) Nian En, where are you? Keep reading, keep reading. Looking for a lighter, I thought it was a cigarette in my mouth and I wanted to light it. )

At this time, the background broadcast sounded again: typhoon warning, the strong typhoon "Hornet" will land in the coastal area from Yangjiang to Zhanjiang around 10 tonight. It is hoped that all units will urgently organize the work of "wind resistance and emergency rescue". )

Man: (jump up and wake up. Shit, I almost forgot the business! (Desperate to rush to the door, go back and forth, give the thermometer to the wife who is at a loss, turn around and open the door, and rush off the stage against the wind and rain. )

Woman: I chased the door against the wind, and the wind blew in the backcourt. I raised my hand to keep out the wind and rain, stood on tiptoe and looked anxiously into the distance. Suddenly, I looked at the thermometer in my hand and lost my voice. 39.5 degrees Celsius. He has a high fever! ! (Desperately chasing out the door, while running, shouting emotionally) Can't you take care of yourself! ! (rushing off the stage in the rain. )

The stage lights dimmed and the curtain fell. …)

The whole play is over.