Language humorous stories and others (please click to view)

The bus was so crowded that a woman stood at the door.

A GG pushed out of the car from the rear,

Say "sorry, get off" to the woman, and the woman will move.

GG stepped on her when she pushed over.

As a result, the woman was so fierce that she scolded "You are crazy!" You're crazy! ~ ~ ",loud enough for the whole car to see.

GG was silent for a long time. When he got off the bus, he couldn't bear it. He turned to the woman and said, "Repeater!"

The whole car burst into laughter ~!

There are some funny children in the back who have been playing the scene just now.

A said, "You are crazy! . . . . . B said, "You repeat the machine. " .。 . . .

The whole car burst into laughter ~!

Later, a little MM wanted to get off the bus, too, and squeezed over and said timidly, "I ~ I ~ I want to go down, I'm not crazy ~!"

The whole car laughed again ~!

The woman didn't speak, and a word came from the side, "Are you out of power?"

The whole car is laughing ~!

Just give you one! !

Interviewee: kid 0000 1a- apprentice magician level 2 1 1-7 02:27.

1, a person always farts in the office, and colleagues can't help but say: Can you keep quiet? Then I saw him sitting.

The man kept shaking and asked, Why? Answer: I tuned it to vibrate.

2. A migrant worker went to the hospital for examination because of a blocked stool. After the doctor checked, he gave the man a prescription, and the migrant workers went to get the medicine.

It looks like a roll of toilet paper. I'm confused. The doctor said, don't wipe your ass with a cement bag in the future!

The monkey picked up a card and climbed to the branch to see what it was. Unexpectedly, a lightning strike hit it, monkey.

The son cried and said, "It turned out to be an ‘IP' card."

In a fashion shop, I saw an impatient young man say to a beautiful girl, "Do you mind?"

Can you talk to me? "The girl asked curiously," Why? " "My wife has been in this shop for a long time.

When, but if she sees me talking to you, she will come out at once ... "Before he finished, his wife had already

Quickly walked out of the fashion shop and helped him away.

A gentleman urinated in an empty sprite bottle while driving, and rushed out of the car in traffic jam. He tried to put the bottle in the trash can and was stopped by a respectful policeman. Then take a sip and show me the sprite left in the bottle!

My son sleeps with his mother every night.

Mom said: When you grow up, marry a daughter-in-law to sleep with your mother?

A: Hmm!

Mom said, what about your wife?

The son said, let her sleep with her father.

Dad said excitedly after listening: this child has been sensible since childhood!

7, cannibal father and son hunting, the son grabbed a thin man, the father said: release, no meat! His son also captured a fat man, his father

Say: let go, it's too greasy! His son captured another beautiful woman, and his father said, take it home and eat your mother at night!

8. A police dog saw an ordinary dog coming on the road and rushed over to ask it: I am a police dog.

What are you? Ordinary dogs looked disdainfully and said, SB, you see clearly, Lao Tzu is plain clothes!

9. I want to count stars

At the end of the year, a colleague who was usually very calm drank his eyes red that day. When the leader saw that the situation was not good, he quickly asked me to take him home. But when I reached for a taxi, my colleague didn't get on the bus anyway, but sat on the side of the road with great interest. He looked up and said to the sky, "Who said there are countless stars in the sky? I want to count them all tonight! " "

10, stop the police car

At a dinner party, a buddy drank a little too much, but he looked sober and everyone ignored him. At the end of the meal, the buddy suddenly rushed to the middle of the road, stretched out his hand and stopped a patrolling 1 10 police car, then opened the door and rushed to the police sitting inside and said loudly, I know your car is one kilometer (taxis in Qingdao are priced at one kilometer), but you don't have to write it so big for me. You think I'm nearsighted ...