Is it really that important to have a son in the countryside? !

Before my family was born on July 7th, I talked with my friend Lao Luo about having a second child and coming out to work after the latter child was born. I said, a child is too lonely. When the two children are young, they will have a companion, and when they grow up, they will have a relative to watch and help each other. Lao Luo said that it is so difficult to survive on our own in Shenzhen and the cost of educating children is so high (we are all engaged in or in contact with the education industry). You think a little too much. It would be nice to have one. In fact, I quite agree with his idea that it is really not easy to raise a child in Shenzhen. Many people cry that they can't afford two children, and their income can't be said to be too low. Numerous reports also say that China has entered the era of low fertility, and many people are unwilling to have children. I just thought, it seems that people nowadays basically only have one or two children (and so do people around them). until ...

As I said in my last article, when I was born on July 7, the labor process was too long. I lived in the waiting room early in the morning and didn't enter the delivery room (that is, the delivery room) from the waiting room until three o'clock in the morning. In this process, six people in the same labor room and five other beds went one after another, about 20 people (the doctor said to have children together at the end of the year and the beginning of the year). My accompanying aunt and mother-in-law chat with her accompanying mother-in-law and husband in the next bed from time to time. From their chat, I found that there are very few firstborn children like me, most of them are third, fourth and fifth births. If you ask further, it turns out that there is either a daughter in front or only one is a son. Now the child wants a son. This desire is not only what mother-in-law and husband want, but also what high-necked women lying in hospital beds want. The idea is also very simple: what can I do without a son in the countryside? ! A mother who was in the delivery room with me gave birth to her fifth child. When the doctor asked her if your family was a male treasure or a female treasure, I obviously felt her face changed. It's a female treasure. It is said that the first three female treasures are male treasures, and this one needs a male treasure. When chatting, I can only say that this baby is really lucky, with three sisters and one brother in pain. I don't care what her mother thinks.

To be honest, I'm actually a little shocked. If I go back a few years, such as my dad's generation, this idea is normal. My grandfather and father were both the only children in the family. At that time, they were really excluded and bullied by the village. Until we were born, the village was still watching jokes. Is it our generation or only one son? Later, my younger brothers were born one after another (I have three younger brothers), and I can obviously feel that my grandparents' backs are much straighter. At that time, family planning in our country was the strictest. When we go to school in the early morning, we always see a small box on the side of the road, and we know it is a baby girl without looking. Girls were abandoned, which was common at that time. I don't want to know more about where those poor children ended up. But I have always felt that many boys who grew up together in their thirties have not found wives (there are many bachelors in the countryside now), which is a causal cycle. Now, in fact, many people don't live in the countryside, and there is no crowding out and bullying at the beginning. The kindness of girls is increasingly prominent. Why are so many people obsessed with having sons now? Seeing so many boys and girls now, to be honest, such a son doesn't want to post backwards. And I think my daughter's educational energy input is relatively small. It would be great if she could be educated well. I remember a Korean drama "Gossip Seven Princess" I saw in college. Top a beautiful top a capable. Of course, in the end, parents are full of intimacy. But the reality is ...

On the second day after Qiqi was born, my cousins came to see me together. They are all teachers, one in primary school and the other in high school. During the chat, I talked about my cousin's precise poverty alleviation work (really out of curiosity). She said that the target of her poverty alleviation is basically out of poverty. The other person is taking care of his son alone. His son graduated from college and is already in graduate school. Now he has moved to Nanning. Menstruation asked curiously, isn't this supposed to be very poor? Cousin said, I don't know, anyway, the index belongs to their family, probably because there is a college student? Menstruation asked (I actually wanted to ask): Isn't it easy to produce a college student in the countryside now? My sister-in-law retorted: No, many people in rural areas are not conscious of giving their children a good education, and there are many left-behind children. It is difficult to become a college student now. Looking back on the situation in my village, it is like this (it seems that there was no progress with me at that time). Every child in the family can go to school at first, and whoever can go to school in the end depends on himself. No educational methods, no cram schools ... no. If admitted, the economic conditions are ok and you can go to school; Those with average economic conditions are generally biased towards their sons. Go out to work without studying (going out to work without studying has become a mantra). When I met her parents again a few years later, I asked: Is your daughter married? The other party replied: Yes. Going means: she found a partner, had children with her partner, went to other people's homes with her partner and became a daughter-in-law. Some people get licenses, others don't. Generally, the places to go are far away, and because of the limited ability to make money, it is good to come back once a year, or even not to come back for several years. In the words of their parents: raise bad rice (for nothing) and help others raise their daughters-in-law. Raising without teaching, children have the ability to go out, but they have no ability to fly back, which is equivalent to raising for nothing. Moreover, many people don't know that in our countryside, after a girl gets married, her family will say "that's the one who went out" and she has no right to inherit property and participate in family affairs. Suddenly a little sad, if it is difficult for ordinary people to raise two children, it is still difficult to raise four or five children in the work of two people in the countryside, anyway. I almost forgot to mention that the first parturient in the bed next to me in the labor room was a girl of 17 years old, the first child, who graduated from junior high school and came out to work. Two or three years later, she got married and is expecting a child. I'm really scared of these new girls. Someone will go the same way as her.

? I don't know how important it is to have a son in the countryside, but for these girls, it is most important to be treated equally and receive education equally.