How should the prospective daughter-in-law respond when she goes to her husband's house for the first time but is asked to do housework?

Before starting today's article, let's throw out a controversial question for a long time.

It's the first time a girl goes to see her husband's home and parents. Should she do housework?

don't rush to answer first, let's take a look at the comments of some netizens.

Some people say that you shouldn't work. First of all, every girl is a little princess at home before she gets married. Why should she be a cow and a horse when she goes to her mother-in-law's house?

Secondly, if a woman is diligent at first, she will only get more and more tired later. When she marries, she will become a servant of the man's family completely. Once she gets used to it, she will definitely suffer in the future.

so what do people who think they should work say? First, follow the traditional idea that women should do housework.

Second, out of politeness, we think that we should give a hand when going to other people's homes for dinner, which can be said to have different reasons.

In fact, for girls nowadays, even in their own homes, there are fewer and fewer people who are willing to do housework voluntarily. Of course, no one can imagine that brushing the dishes or sweeping the floor will one day become a stumbling block to their feelings.

1 fell in love for two years, and went to her mother-in-law's house for the first time for the New Year. She kept in mind her mother's two words

After falling in love for two years, the reader Yu Xin actually refused.

She doesn't want to meet her boyfriend's parents because she thinks she is too young to have enough fun and is in no hurry to get married.

But her boyfriend was in a hurry. He persuaded Yu Xin to go to his house for the New Year, saying that his parents couldn't wait to see her, hoping that she wouldn't refuse again.

My boyfriend's hometown is not far from his work place, and it takes four hours by bus. Seeing that Yu Xin couldn't refuse, she discussed with her parents that she would go to her boyfriend's home for the New Year this year.

Yu Xin's mother disagreed from the beginning: "A little girl who is not married will go to the man's house for the New Year, and it will make people laugh."

Mother is very conservative. She thinks that her daughter is so precious that she can't go to the man's house without name or share. Besides, it's Chinese New Year, which is too inappropriate.

Who knows that Yu Xin's boyfriend personally came to persuade me, saying, "Auntie, Xiaoxin and I have been in love for two years, and my parents are anxious and want to see her. Usually, she is busy at work, so I finally have time for the Spring Festival, so you can agree."

Her boyfriend finally persuaded Yu Xin's parents, so she summoned up her courage and went to her boyfriend's house for the New Year.

Before leaving, Yu Xin's mother told her many things, the two most important of which are: First, don't share a room with her boyfriend, which makes her look frivolous. Second, don't be diligent. Never do dishes and sweep the floor. She didn't go to his house as a servant.

Speaking of this, Yu Xin's mother regretted it very much, and said with self-mockery, "I was so stupid at the beginning. I cooked a table of rice the first time I met your grandmother. Since then, I have been idle for a whole life."

Yu Xin keeps it in mind. She also understands how hard her mother has worked in recent years. When her grandparents were still living together, her mother cooked for five people. Now a family of three lives, and her father rarely goes to the kitchen, so she knows why her mother told her.

She promised, "Don't worry, Mom, I'm not stupid. Whoever likes to work will do it, and I won't do it anyway."

So, with these two words, she followed her boyfriend on the bus to her husband's house for the New Year, feeling excited and a little nervous.

2 The man's parents shook their heads and refused, and advised the young couple to break up as soon as possible on the grounds of laziness.

Yu Xin went to her boyfriend's house, a house with four bedrooms and two halls, covering an area of 15 square meters, which was very spacious.

The home is clean. There are jade porcelain vases with wintersweet on the dining table, bonsai and tea sets on the coffee table. The plain sofa cushions make the living room particularly neat, with bright marble floors reflecting the sunlight from the balcony. It is as clean as a mirror and spotless.

"Wow, your home is so clean." This is Yu Xin's first feeling.

"Well, my mother is a neat freak, and she likes to tidy up the house every day." The boyfriend nodded and smiled and explained.

Yu Xin thought to herself, that's right. My mother-in-law loves cleanliness, and she must be willing to work. If she is lazy, she will be lazy, so it is logical to carry out her mother's instructions.

So during cooking, my mother-in-law once asked her with a smile, "Daughter, will you hire jiaozi to help my aunt?"

all of them were rejected by Yu Xin: "Auntie, I can't do anything. My mother won't let me do this at home, saying I just have to work hard and don't have to do housework."

Actually, she's telling the truth. Usually, her mother taught her the same thing. Just study hard when she was a child. She doesn't have to worry about things at home. Just work hard after graduation, not to mention being busy with housework.

Unexpectedly, her repeated refusals made her in-laws' faces fall, especially her mother-in-law. When she saw this, she was unhappy and went back to the kitchen with a snort.

My boyfriend also advised Yu Xin: "My mother is alone in the kitchen, so you should at least help."

Yu Xin refused: "I won't do it. Don't help. Besides, why don't you go?"

In this way, a New Year's Eve dinner began in a strange atmosphere. After three rounds of drinking, my mother-in-law smiled and said, "Daughter, come straight to the point, you are not suitable for our son. You are too lazy to touch the water, which is beyond our ordinary people's ability to marry."

Because it was New Year's Eve, this remark passed by and nobody took it to heart. The next day, her mother-in-law repeated it again, and Yu Xin fully understood her mother-in-law's meaning.

It turns out that she was not liked by her in-laws, and was directly persuaded to break up by the other party.

3 is it important for a woman to be diligent in marriage?

Yu Xin thinks that she didn't do anything wrong. Her mother has worked hard all her life, and she is not comfortable. Isn't it because she is too hardworking?

And her boyfriend's mother doesn't think she did anything wrong. She loves cleanliness and is willing to do housework, so she asks her daughter-in-law to be so diligent.

My boyfriend didn't refuse his parents' disapproval on the spot, but later he didn't agree to break up with Yu Xin.

Yu Xin thinks that she and her boyfriend's parents have different values, and some of them are not optimistic about this relationship, and think it is better to break up early.

Now she is deadlocked with her boyfriend and doesn't know what to do.

In fact, for marriage, the most important thing for young couples is to find a lifestyle that suits each other. Whether they are hardworking or not, and whether they do housework or not is not the main contradiction.

Besides, women don't have to do housework, and men can go to washing my hands to make the bridal soup, so the problem will be solved.

or is it true that a woman must be able to do housework, otherwise, she can't be called a good wife and mother?

Yu Xin told her best friend about her experience, and her best friend scolded her for believing her mother's words by mistake and suffering from laziness.

but I think it's just a "choice" difference, and there is no real right or wrong.

well, what do you think?