Tell your jokes.

Adapted version of Little Shenyang "Not Bad Money"

"The most interesting thing is the ending ~ ~ howl ~ ~ ~"

"Laugh and leave a message ~ ~ howl ~ ~ ~"

"Thank you for your support ~ ~ ~ Howl ~ ~"

University:

The school is actually very short,

As soon as the dormitory comes out and enters, the day passes, howling ~?

As soon as the dormitory came out, a semester passed, howling ~

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of school?

I went to class, and the teacher didn't call the roll!

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of school?

Didn't go to class, the teacher called the roll!

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of school?

It means "the first class didn't call the roll, and the second class left the teacher to call the roll!" " "

Working article:

The working day is actually very short.

As soon as the computer is turned on and off, the day passes, howling ~?

The computer is on and off, and another day has passed, howling ~?

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of work? It means "off duty, the work is not finished yet!" "

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of work? I haven't finished my work yet. I'm finished.

The most painful thing on the day of work is that there is no work to do at work, and you have to live after work. . . . .

Stock market article:

This stock market is actually short-lived.

As soon as the eyes close and open, the morning light closes and howls ~?

Close your eyes again, this afternoon's closing has passed again, howling ~?

Do you know what is the most painful thing? The stock market went from 2000 to 6000, but I was short. ...

Do you know what is the most painful thing? The stock market is from 6000 to 2000, but it belongs to Man Cang. ...

Valentine's day:

Valentine's Day is actually very short.

When the hand is pulled loose, the lover is gone. Howl ~?

If you can't let go, you'll become a wife, huh?

Do you know what is the most painful thing about Valentine's Day? No lover ...

Do you know what is the most painful thing about Valentine's Day? All your lovers are looking for you on Valentine's Day.

Marriage articles:

This life is actually very short.

Get married as soon as you close your eyes and open them, huh?

Close your eyes again and howl if you have children ~ .......

Do you know what is the most painful thing in life? After washing diapers today, I will wash them tomorrow.

Do you know what is the most painful thing in life? Just put the shit cloth on the child, and the child pulled again. Howl ~

Category:

The class days are actually very short.

As soon as you close your eyes and open them, a while passes, howling ~?

Head up and down again, another day has passed, howling ~?

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of class? It means "class is over, I feel that I haven't finished sleeping!"

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of class? It means "I feel asleep before class is over."

Do you know what is the most painful thing on the day of class? I just didn't feel anything in class. When the class was almost over, I went to bed. "

Buy a house:

Looking at the house is actually a short day!

As soon as the car stops and drives, a real estate will pass.

The car can't stop, and a house slave howls ~?

Stock market article:

This kind of stock trading is actually short-lived.

Close your eyes and open your eyes, and the stock price will go up, howling ~?

Close your eyes again, and the stock will be quilted again. Howl ~?

Do you know what is the most painful thing this year? That is, for a year, you can stare at the market and count stocks, and your hair is white.

Do you know what is the most painful thing this year? That is, everything you bought didn't go up, and everything you didn't buy went up.

The most painful thing this year has finally gone up. Oh, dear, I sold it yesterday. What can I do? ...

The most classic! ! ：

Mengniu: Has melamine been detected in our products?

Inspector: Congratulations, no!

Mengniu: Have you detected carcinogens?

Inspector: Congratulations, the content is not that high.

Mengniu: Yes. How high is it?

Inspector: Not enough to cause cancer, just harmful!

Mengniu: Are there any harmful substances?

Inspector: Really ... Still ... Still not?

Mengniu: You don't know what you are testing. Not bad money!

Inspector: Oh ~ ~No..

Mengniu: Are there any beneficial bacteria factors?

Inspector: No!

Mengniu: You can have this. ...

Inspector: This is really not available. ...

Do you know what is the most painful thing for me to do this article? That is, everyone left a message, but they didn't share it ~ ~ ~ howl ~ ~

Do you know what is the most painful thing for me to do this article? That is, everyone shared it, but there was no message ~ ~ howl ~ ~

Do you know what is the most painful thing for me to do this article? That is, everyone doesn't share or leave a message ~ howl ~ ~

5 jokes that Japanese people hate most (China people will definitely top (repost))

5 jokes that Japanese people hate most (China people will definitely top (repost))

The five most annoying jokes in Japan (1)

Four surgeons sit together and talk about who they like to operate on.

The first doctor said, "I like operating on librarians best." When you open their bodies, inside

Everything is arranged alphabetically. "

The second doctor said, "I like operating on accountants best." When you open their bodies, everything is under pressure.

Number arrangement. "

The third doctor said, "I like operating on electricians best." When you find their bodies, everything is useless.

Color code. "

The fourth doctor said, "I like operating on Japanese best." The other three doctors looked at each other and said

Wondering what one of them asked. The fourth doctor said, because they have no heart and no spine, and their butts and heads can be exchanged.

Five jokes that little Japan hates most.

(2)

A man called a Japanese businessman and said, "I'm looking for Mr. Taro." The operator said, "Sorry, he went last week.

The world no longer exists. "The next day, the man called again and wanted to talk to Kazutaro. This time, the operator got a little bored and said

I've been telling you that he died last week. Why are you calling? "The man said," because of me.

I just want to hear it. "

(3)

A Japanese is eating in a restaurant in China. When the waiter brought a panlong shrimp, the Japanese asked, excuse me.

What do children do with leftover shrimp shells? ""Of course, "said the waiter." Don't! Don't! Don't! "The Japanese repeatedly shook his head.

The boss said, "In Japan, leftover shrimp shells are sent to the factory, made into shrimp cakes, and then sold to you in China.

"After a while, the waiter brought another plate of fruit. The Japanese pointed to one of the lemons and asked, "What about you?

Dispose of the remaining lemon peel? ""Of course, "said the waiter." Don't! Don't! Don't! "Said the Japanese shook his head.

"In Japan, the leftover lemon peel is sent to the factory to make fruit treasures, and then sold to you in China."

When checking out, the Japanese asked the waiter with a smile while chewing gum, "What should I do with the leftovers?"

Gum? ""Of course I threw up, "said the waiter." Don't! Don't! Don't! "The Japanese proudly shook his head.

"In Japan, chewed gum is sent to factories, made into condoms, and then sold to you in China.

The waiter asked impatiently, "Do you know how to deal with used condoms in China?" "Throw it away, of course. "Japanese humanity. The waiter shook his head and said, "No! Don't! Don't! In China, we throw away used condoms.

Go into the factory, make chewing gum and sell it to you in Japan. "

Japan's five most annoying jokes (4)

A taxi is driving on the way to Chicago airport, and a Japanese tourist is sitting on it. At this time, one

A taxi passed by and the Japanese shouted, "Look, Toyota! Made in Japan! How fast! " soon

Another taxi passed by. "Look, Nissan! It's made in Japan! It's too early! " Another taxi passed.

The past "hey! It's Mitsubishi made in Japan! Very fast! " Taxi drivers are 100% American. Look at that.

Seeing that so many Japanese cars have surpassed their American cars, plus the arrogant language of that Japanese, I can't help but get annoyed.

When another taxi overtook it, the taxi pulled into the airport parking lot. "It's Honda! Made in Japan! quick

Great! There's no cure! "The taxi driver stopped and pointed angrily at the meter and said," 1500 dollars.

. ""so close to 1500 dollars? ！” "meter! Made in Japan! Very fast! There's no cure! "

Japan's five most annoying jokes (5)

There is an American, a German, a Japanese and a China on a plane. The plane flew halfway.

Suddenly out of breath, the captain announced that he would jump off the plane alone to reduce his weight, so the American played his personal role.

Masculinity went to the door of the plane and shouted: Long live the United States and other countries! ! Then I jumped! plane

Continue to fly ... at this moment, the captain announced: the weight is still too heavy, and one person will jump! So the Germans

Just stand up, walk to the front of the plane door and shout: Long live the German Empire! Jumped down, too Aircraft inheritance

Keep flying ... at this moment, the captain announced: no, it's still heavy, you must jump alone! China people look.

Gave the Japanese a look, stood up and walked to the door of the plane. The Japanese came quickly and held China's hand tightly:

Good brother, I won't forget you! The people of China shouted: Long live the people and country of China! ! Take a step.

The Japanese were kicked down! ! ......

Smile happily, ten years old, don't blame me for having a stomachache!

1 Jia was a soldier. After returning home, he shouted in his dream every day: Jane! I can't live without you! The wife asked who Jane was, and A said it was his war horse. A few days later, my wife stuffed A with a letter: Your war horse wrote it for you!

Wife: Do you remember last February, when you said you were going fishing? Husband: Of course I remember. Why? Wife: A fish called this morning to say that you have become a father!

After I was arrested, they made me confess. The day before they hit me, I didn't confess; I didn't ask for Chili water the next day; On the third day, a woman coaxed me into confessing. The fourth day, I wanted to confess, but I was dragged out and shot.

A woman had a stomachache, and the doctor told her to take off her pants when she saw the doctor. There was no response after several reminders, and the doctor was impatient: there are still many people waiting in line, hurry up! Women are shy when they want to talk: you ... take it off first!

Man: I really love you, but a young lady is pregnant, and I have to say I did it. Wife: I absolutely believe it's not you. Take a closer look at our children. What is like you?

2 reply: smile happily, ten years old, don't blame me for my stomachache!

When a leader made a report on learning Lei Feng's spirit, he read the manuscript: Lei Feng is not dead! The secretary whispered: energetic, energetic! The leader went on to say: still in spirit!

A woman took a check to the bank to cash it. Teller: Can you prove yourself? Puzzled, the woman took out the mirror and took a look. A: Yes! It's me

Judge: You claim that the defendant stole money from your socks? Girl: Yes, my Lord. Judge: Then why didn't you resist? The girl blushed and replied, I didn't know he wanted to steal my money.

I want to remind you that my husband will be back in an hour. But I didn't do anything rude I know. If you want to do something, there is less than an hour left.

Did your wife make a scene last night? Yes, she is angry with dogs. Poor dog! I think I heard your wife even threaten to take the key to the door!

3 reply: smile happily, ten years old, don't blame me for my stomachache!

1 1 Lena failed to get pregnant and went to church to pray. A year later, she gave birth to a son. A friend wanted to try it after learning about it. Lena said, no problem, as long as the young janitor is still here.

12 There is a female bear on the mountain, and the hunter wants to catch it. In the first battle, the hunter was defeated by the bear and raped! Take a few days off and fight again, and then get raped! After the recovery, the bear laughed wildly after seeing it. Are you here for hunting or prostitution?

13 An old lady can't read, but she must listen to the weather forecast every day. I asked my family at dinner one day: I have a question. Where is the local area? It rains there almost every day.

14 the old farmer went to town to see a doctor, and the nurse said to him, go! Blood test, urine test and stool test! After a while, the old farmer came back with a pot of shit and said, daughter, the blood has been swallowed, and the urine has been swallowed. This shit really can't be swallowed!

15 Two farm children are chatting. A suddenly asked: Does your cow smoke? Are you out of your mind? How can cows smoke? Oh, well, maybe your cowshed is on fire.

4 reply: smile happily, ten years old, don't blame me for my stomachache!

There was a long queue in front of the toilet in 16. A gentleman: I can't hold it any longer. Can you let me in first? The person in front clenched his fist and squeezed a word through his teeth: * * *, at least you can talk!

17 A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by. A policeman came over and asked, What's the matter? The drunk replied: I don't know, I just arrived!

18 Two female employees were chatting at lunch. The new chairman is really handsome and well dressed. B: That's right. I'm still dressing quickly.

Patient 19: As soon as I entered, I heard the nurse say,' Be brave, don't be afraid! Appendiceal surgery is very simple. Doctor: That's right. Patient: But she said it to the doctor who is going to operate on me!

Passenger: Your drivers drive at an amazing speed, but they seldom have accidents. What is the reason? The driver said, sir, that unskilled driver died in a car accident long ago.