A little joke to relieve tension

Nowadays, with the accelerated pace of life, people are often nervous. Let me introduce some jokes to you, hoping to help you relax.

After a hard day's work, relax with a little joke.

1. I went to ktv to drink with two buddies last night. After drinking for a while, I got bored and left. A buddy said I wanted to do something exciting. I thought I would kill him this time and agreed, but he took a bottle of beer and swung it at a man at the next table, then turned around and said? Run? People walked away. Seeing that something was wrong, we ran out at once. Fortunately, your mother runs fast, otherwise it will be serious.

2, sleeping, suddenly the class teacher called, decisively hung up and waited for two minutes to call back:? Teacher, I was just in class. I'll call you back when I get out. what can I do for you? Oh, nothing. I just checked the dormitory and saw that you slept soundly. I'll call you and tell you it's time to get up. ? Me. . .

I often played games when I was in junior high school. I often go to Internet cafes all night. There is a girl with long hair sitting in front. The long one. Every time she sleeps in class, she always puts her hair down. Many years later, the class reunion found that she had cut her hair short. Still so beautiful. Ask her why she cut it. She said she didn't like long hair very much. Long hair is for teenagers who often stay up late behind her to sleep soundly without being discovered by the teacher.

4. reporter:? How can a great calligrapher like you live in a house of 40 square meters? The master said:? When I was young, my father told me the story of Wang Xianzhi. His father, Wang Xizhi, told him that as long as he brought eighteen water tanks in the yard to polish ink and practice calligraphy until the water ran out, he would understand the way of calligraphy. ? With that, he looked around. There was no water tank at home, so it was written on the wall that the house was 100 square meters. ?

When I was in college, there was a free landline in the dormitory. A roommate calls his girlfriend to chat every day, and it's midnight, so everyone can't sleep. One day we secretly cut off the telephone line, but he still talked until midnight, and we couldn't sleep for a long time that night?

6. Dad is a heavy smoker. Some time ago, my mother has been persuading him to quit smoking and earnestly advised him to eat snacks! Eat melon seeds! Chew gum! You can quit smoking. Today, a month later, my mother went to a small shop to buy a pack of cigarettes and threw them to my father: Go ahead and smoke. I think eating snacks may die faster than smoking! ?

7. My friend said that the new season of running men came and asked me if I wanted to tear up famous brands. I thought: Forget it. I almost got beat up last year. ? My friend was suspicious and asked me why. I replied:? Last year, I got drunk and played with them. As a result, I ran to the main road and hugged the special police on duty.

My brother was very naughty when he was a child. It is common to be beaten three times a day! My mother beat him at home, and my father followed my mother to beat my brother as soon as he came back and entered the door. Tired, he asked my mother, What's the matter? What's wrong with this kid? My mother said:? He will have an exam this afternoon, and he is likely to fail again. I'm going to dinner tonight, so I don't have time to talk to him. I eat first at noon. ?

9. Last night, a friend (female) said that she couldn't sleep and her parents were not at home, so she asked me to accompany her. Later, I didn't think much, so I took a friend (female) to her house to be a landlord for one night, and then came back to sleep this morning. She just woke up and wanted to find her. Found out she hacked me. Why is this?

10. Today, I changed my mobile phone number, decided on Doby's girlfriend, and sent her a short message. Fate is predestined. Do you want to know your fate with him? Please send your real name and his real name, such as Xiaoming and Xiaohong. The consultation fee is two yuan each. Two minutes later, I received the names of my girlfriend and my brother?

Tips to ease the tension before the exam

1 Keep normal heart

One of the psychological characteristics of candidates who successfully pass the written examination is that they can treat the public examination with a normal heart. They don't regard the civil service examination as a mystery, which can greatly alleviate their nervousness.

Although each of us is eager to succeed, we are eager to achieve ideal results in the civil service examination. However, the civil service examination is a selective examination after all. Can't everyone take it? Are you successful or dead? Candidates with ideas will only make themselves more nervous, even at a loss, and play abnormally in the examination room. Therefore, treat it with a normal heart, treat the civil service examination as an application examination, and give full play to your own level. Maybe this will make you stand out from the cannon fodder and win the first place.

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Pay attention to work and rest and diet

Even in the preparation period, daily life should be orderly, and the relatively fixed time of getting up, sleeping, eating, exercising, entertaining, working and studying should be guaranteed every day, thus forming a sense of physiological rhythm and psychological rhythm of the human body, with a view to peace of mind and emotional stability.

Some candidates are often continuous in order to get good grades? Burning the midnight oil? If you don't pay attention to rest, the result is counterproductive. Due to serious lack of sleep, brain overload, imbalance between excitement and inhibition, candidates have dizziness, tinnitus, memory loss, mood swings and other conditions, thus affecting test scores. Therefore, Chinese public education experts suggest that candidates must ensure sleep time.

In addition, candidates should pay attention to their diet a few days before the exam, and never eat food that is too cold or spicy to avoid diarrhea or other symptoms and delay the exam. If candidates can't sleep a few days before the exam, they can drink a glass of milk before going to bed, which will help them fall asleep as soon as possible.

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3. Appropriate arrangements for learning content

Some candidates are nervous and anxious because of reading the materials at hand, and many of them have not reviewed them. Therefore, the daily study content is very full and the study time is not enough, so the daily plan is often difficult to complete, and the psychological pressure is getting bigger and bigger.

Leave room for your study plan and don't maximize it, otherwise it will easily lead to nervousness and even panic. Make corresponding learning content every time. If you encounter difficulties and other obstacles, you should learn to give up and enter the next stage of review, otherwise your confidence will be frustrated and your study plan will be disrupted. As long as you have a plan and know how to choose, you can ensure the smooth completion of your daily study plan.

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Appropriate relaxation

Doing necessary sports and recreational activities can also help candidates adjust their mood. Proper exercise can eliminate fatigue and restore energy. Appropriate entertainment activities, such as singing one's favorite songs, listening to one's favorite music and ignoring fast-paced TV programs, are meaningful for adjusting life and relieving tension. China public education experts advise candidates not to play computer and surf the Internet.

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Build confidence

Psychological research proves that under the same ability and level, the success rate of people with high self-confidence is obviously higher than that of people with low self-confidence. Therefore, maintaining full confidence in yourself is a favorable guarantee for success. So, how to cultivate self-confidence before the exam? The key is to set up one? I believe I can reach the best level, I can do it! This is not blind optimism, but a positive self-psychological suggestion, which can make people face all kinds of difficulties and crises optimistically, bravely and effectively, and stand up before the exam? Believe in yourself, I can do it? This concept will play a positive role in maintaining a good examination status.