See the joke of spinach seedlings.

On this beautiful Christmas Eve, the Lord said that one of my wishes could come true. I took out my globe and said, I want world peace! The Lord said it was too difficult!

I took out your photo and said, make this person beautiful! God sweated and said, "Bring me the globe and let me have a look!"

A child in the delivery room smiled after birth, and the midwife was very surprised. When she leaned in to observe, she found that the child's fist was tight. After breaking it, she found a contraceptive pill. All she heard was the baby laughing and saying, "There's no fucking way to kill me."

Boyfriend and girlfriend sleep in the same room, and the woman draws a clear line: animals cross the border. Woke up and found that the man really didn't cross the line, and the woman slapped the man hard: you are not even as good as an animal!

I am so focused on the exam.

It attracted countless candidates to bend down.

Cherish Qin Huang Hanwu, too timid.

Song zu Tang zong, had to copy

Jenghiz Khan

Finally, just hand in the blank paper.

They're all gone, they're romantic figures, and they all retake the exam.

A gentleman graduated from the philosophy department of Duff University. I can't find a job after graduation and have been unemployed at home. One day,

A college classmate introduced him to work in Muka Zoo, and he went happily. It turned out that a tiger in the zoo was temporarily ill and was taken to the hospital. He was asked to put on tiger skin for the time being. He thought that no one could tell it was him anyway, so he agreed. After putting on the tiger skin and putting it in the cage, he dutifully walked around pretending to be a tiger. It didn't take long for the cage to open and another tiger came in. He was so scared that he retreated to the corner. The tiger kept approaching him. ..

..... Finally back to no way back, the tiger spoke. ..

"Dude, don't be afraid! I am from the philosophy department of National Taiwan University! "

A college student was caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, where are you from? I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me!

The college student replied to the enemy's words and was electrocuted. He said, I am from TV University.

Have you eaten? Please receive the short message. The elephant put shit in the middle of the road, and an ant just passed by. Looking up at the misty mountain peak, it couldn't help singing: Alasao, this is the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau! ~~~~

Two counterfeiters inadvertently made counterfeit banknotes with a face value of 15 yuan, and they decided to spend them in remote mountainous areas. When they bought a 15 yuan candied haws with 0 yuan, they cried and the farmer gave them two 7-dollar ones.

In a military exercise, a shell deviated far away. The soldiers sent to inspect found that the shells landed in the farmland, and Tian Zhongzheng stood with you. Your clothes are torn and your face is black. You said with tears: It's worth stealing a cabbage with shells.

When I was promoted to junior high school, fame brought me great trouble. For the safety of teachers, all middle schools in the city refused to accept me. No way, I went to the countryside with infinite yearning for key middle schools. Although the conditions of middle schools in rural areas are a little bitter, I still live very comfortably without the pressure of public opinion. However, gold always shines, and the unique silence of rural middle schools did not restrain my outbreak.

By chance, I was born again, suddenly emerged, and quickly occupied the rural market. It was a quiz, and our class was tied with another class after the final. So the host announced the final decision: each class draws lots to send a representative. Two representatives will guess the coin again. The right person asks the wrong person a question. If the wrong person answers correctly, the wrong person wins. On the other hand, the category set in which the correct guesser belongs wins. Spirit of heaven, spirit of the earth, my job is to hide. As a representative, I was drawn, successfully guessed the wrong coin and entered the question-and-answer stage. Teachers and classmates suddenly became nervous, and everyone looked at me with eager eyes. Teacher Li, in particular, looked heavy and said nothing. I also felt some pressure, but not because of this, but because of my opponent, Wang Xiaofo, who was the most powerful "teacher killer" in our school at that time, and he also saved several cases. It is said that the last principal was destroyed in its hands. However, I still have some confidence, because in any case, I am also a person who has criticized. The problem begins.

Wang Xiaofo put his hands in his trouser pockets and said slowly, "My mother cooked some eggs in my pocket today. Do you know how many? " "hey!" There was an uproar around. I don't know why everyone is booing, but I know this question has aroused my great interest. Eggs! I hardly heard what he asked. I only heard the word "egg" clearly. You know, in the hard years in the countryside, there was almost nothing to eat. There are two eggs that are really delicious.

I seem to see shiny egg whites and yellow yolk. ...

"If I get it right, will you give me a meal?"

I have long forgotten what quizzes and class honors are. I'm only interested in eggs, eggs! "If you get it right, I'll give you two eggs." "hey!" There is an uproar again. I saw the other classmate's face startled, and the classmates cheered and hugged each other to celebrate the victory. Miss Li also gave me a happy look. I don't know what they are happy about, but everyone is smiling at me. I smiled shyly at them and then answered, "Is it five dollars?" The students' smiles suddenly stopped, and gradually, the ebb tide generally disappeared without a trace. Another classmate suddenly shouted and laughed. Things in this world change quickly. In a blink of an eye, everyone was crying and laughing and didn't know what to do. I haven't had time to think about what is going on. The meeting was suddenly in chaos. I saw a man lying on his back, spraying blood in his mouth, and then slowly fell down.

"Miss Li!"

It's our head teacher! I rushed there, too. I saw the teacher pale, eyes closed and unconscious. "He killed Miss Li!"

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Swish swish swish swish swish! ! !

Angry eyes shot at me like sharp arrows.

My eyes went blank, and a voice came back to my ear: "Duo Long! Close the door! Let the dog go! Idle people will all retreat! " Later, it was said that Mr. Li did not die, but was seriously ill. After he was discharged from the hospital, he saw through the world of mortals, cut his hair and became a monk in Wutai Mountain, and never taught again.