Ask for a cold joke

He passes through a cornfield every day,

But unfortunately,

One day, a fire broke out in the cornfield.

All the corn has turned into popcorn! ! !

After the bird flew over, ...

I think it will be very cold if it snows. ...

2. According to legend,

There's a killer,

The heart is cold,

The sword is cold,

My hands are cold, too

therefore ...

He froze to death! ! !

A polar bear stands alone on the ice in a daze.

Really bored, I started pulling my hair to play.

One ... two ... three ... the last one left,

He suddenly shouted ...

It's cold! ! ………………

4. Once upon a time, there was a man named Cai, and everyone called him.

result ...

One day, he was taken away!

5. Once upon a time, there was a lamb.

One day he went out to play,

I met a wolf,

The wolf said, "I will eat you!" " ! ! "

Guess what?

As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.

6. One day, bean paste buns were walking on the road, and suddenly they had an accident and their stomachs were broken. Before he died, he looked at his stomach and said, "Oh, I am just a bean paste bag."

On a hot afternoon, a match tickled, scratched and caught fire.

Remember the game in the afternoon? In fact, there is still a game behind. His head feels itchy. After catching it, his head caught fire. Then he went to the hospital. After the nurse bandaged him, he became a cotton swab.

8. There is a child who looks like a tomato. One day, he was walking and suddenly fell down. . . . Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, that's funny.

9. There is a penguin who has nothing to do but pluck his hair for fun.

After all, he said, it's really cold.

Sequel: There is a polar bear with nothing to do. He tugged at his hair to play. He said: Penguins are right ...

10. One day, three explorers finally found the "Valley of Hope". According to legend, as long as you stand on the edge of the valley and shout out what you want, and then jump into the valley, you will get what you want. So the three of them decided to have a try.

The first one was a goat, so he shouted "Woman! Woman! Next jump, there is really a beautiful woman waiting for him.

The second is a bookworm, shouting "Book! Books! Books! Books! Books! Then, jump into the valley and get books full of pits and valleys.

The third kind is an indecisive person who can't decide what he likes after thinking for a long time. After an hour, he finally made up his mind that money is the most useful thing, so he went to the valley. He accidentally kicked a stone and scolded "s h i t!" Unexpectedly, an unstable center of gravity fell into the valley.

1 1. There is a fat man …

Jump off a tall building ...

It turned out to be ...

Fat guy ...

12. Do you know why penguins live in Antarctica?

Because it's cold there. ..

13. Stones fight with rice cakes, and when they get angry, they kick the rice cakes into the sea. ...

Tell a story. Once upon a time, there was a couple who secretly decided to spend their lives together, but the boy needed military service, so they made a vow with the girl, gave her a diamond ring and agreed to meet her three years later today. At that time, the ring will be used as a wedding ring.

Three years later, the girl has been waiting for the boy, but she can't. She was so sad that she threw the diamond ring into the sea in despair and ran away from home. In fact, boys have been waiting for girls, but girls remember the date wrong, so it has become an eternal regret. The boy was heartbroken ... a few years later. Boys go fishing. Guess what he caught?

........

......

....

..

New Year cake; rice cake

14. Wife: I am blind and will marry you if I step on shit.

Husband: I was really blind enough to step on shit before I married you.

……

Shit: I'm so unlucky! Lying there, you both stepped on it. ...

15. One day, a fudge was walking in the street.

Walking, she suddenly said, "Oh, my legs are so soft!" "

16. One day, the teacher took a group of children to the mountain to pick fruit.

He announced: "children, we can wash the fruit together after picking it, and we can eat it together after washing."

All the children went to pick fruit.

As soon as the assembly time came, all the children got together.

Teacher: "Xiaohua, what do you have?"

Xiaohua: "I am washing apples because I picked them."

Teacher: "What about you, Xiaomei?"

Xiaomei: "I'm washing tomatoes because I picked tomatoes."

Teacher: "The children are great! What about Amin? "

A-Ming: "I'm washing cloth shoes because I stepped on shit."

17. A man left home for work on Friday afternoon. It was payday, so he didn't go home. He spent all his salary partying with friends all weekend.

When he finally got home on Sunday night, his angry wife was waiting for him and scolded him for nearly an hour. Finally, the wife stopped nagging and asked him, "You haven't seen me for three days in a row. What do you think?" ? 」

He replied, "I think it's quite good. 」

Monday passed and he didn't see his wife.

Tuesday and Wednesday passed, and he still hasn't seen his wife.

On Thursday,

.

.

.

.

The swelling disappeared a little, and he finally managed to see his wife from the corner of his left eye.

18. This is a telephone market survey on pet food. A child answered the phone.

Market dispatcher: "Little friend, do you have any dogs, kittens, rabbits or birds at home?"

Child: "No, my mother only gave birth to me."

19. Once upon a time, Tomato A and Tomato B kept shopping. Then one day, suddenly a truck rushed out and ran over tomato A, with tomato bilibili beside it, pointing at tomato A and laughing: "Ha ... ha ... ketchup ~ ~".

20. There is a lovely pony tied to a lovely pine tree, and the pony becomes a marathon. ....

2 1. One day …

There is a stag running faster and faster. ...

Run to the finish line ...

He became a "high speed stag".

22. One day

The penguin goes to play with the polar bear!

Three years later, I walked to the equator and remembered that the house was open.

It was three years before he went home and closed the door.

Six years later, I went to the North Pole.

The child who knocked on the polar bear said, "Polar bear, I'm coming to play with you!" " "

As soon as the polar bear opened the door, he took a look at the penguin and said, "I don't want to play!" Then turn off the child! "

Penguins are home! ! !

23. A snake bit himself and said when he died: I am a poisonous snake. ...

24. One day, a pair of penguin brothers got bored and began to pluck their own hair. When you're done, say, "It's so cold!"

He sent an e-mail to the polar bear living in the North Pole. He said: it will be very cold if you pull out all your hair!

The polar bear listened with a grain of salt, and he also pulled out all his hair. The result was "so cold!" "

He also sent e-mails to lions living in Africa. He also told the lion: If you pull out all the hair, you will be very cold!

Lions in Africa didn't believe it at first. He said I would never be cold! He pulled out all his hair and said, "It's so cold!"

The bird in the tree heard this and thought, I feel very hot now. Does it really get cold when pulling out your hair? ! So he pulled out all his hair, and he said, "Cool!" I'm going out to fly! After he flew out, he touched it and it died ~ ~!

How can birds fly without feathers? ! Haha ~ ~

On a hot summer day, two bananas were walking on the road.

The banana walking in front suddenly felt so hot.

He said, it's too hot, I want to take off my clothes.

As a result, he skinned it.

As a result, the banana in the back fell down. ...

I had a terrible headache that day. I squatted on the table and groaned, "My headache is going to explode ~ ~ ~"

Xiaoli, my deskmate, cares about me very much. She pulled my skirt and asked me, "Are you all right?"

Then she was blown up.

27. One day, three little pigs built three huts to avoid being chased by wolves. Wolves easily destroyed straw houses, wooden houses and brick houses. Three little pigs ran as fast as they could, but the wolf caught up with them. The three little pigs said in despair, it's up to you. We gave up. Whatever. At this moment, the wolf grinned and drooled and said:

Then tell me where little red riding hood is.

Xiaoming got a new haircut and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged and ran outside to cry. . Cry, cry. . He flew. .

29. The little white rabbit skipped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Oh, sorry, not that much."

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay.

The next day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

Boss: "Sorry, there is still no"

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay again.

On the third day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

The boss said happily, "Yes, yes, we have a hundred buns today! ! "

The little white rabbit took out the money: "Great, I'll buy two!" " "

30. One day, a bird flew from Kaohsiung to Taipei 1 hour. But it took 2 hours to get back!

Why?

Because it is raining! So cover the rain with one hand and let it fly with the other.

3 1. A farmer went hunting with a horse and a dog. After walking all day, I couldn't catch up, but the farmer kept walking. Suddenly the horse said; "I've been walking all day. Do you want to kill me? " The farmer and the hound ran away in fear. They ran under a tree. The hound patted his chest and said, "I'm scared to death." Horses can talk. " As a result, the farmer was scared to death.

32. One day, Zorro went to his mistress's house to have a tryst with her mistress. The hostess asked Zorro, "What if my husband comes back?"

"Zorro said," it's okay. If your husband comes back, I will jump out of the window and my horse will pick me up below. "

The hostess said that if I heard three knocks at the door, my husband would come back.

Zorro said: I see.

After a while, it rained. Suddenly there were three knocks at the door: knock, knock, knock. If it's too late, it will be soon. Zorro jumped out of bed and suddenly jumped out of the window. When the hostess saw Zorro leaving, she went to open the door.

I saw a horse standing in front of the door and said to her, "Tell Zorro it's raining outside and I'll wait for him in the corridor."

33. A passenger plane was flying when it was suddenly hit by a small airflow. The passengers panicked and thought that the end of the world was coming. A beautiful young girl stood up and got up the courage to say to everyone, "Dear male passengers, who can let me try to be a woman before I die?"

As soon as the voice fell, a man in the back seat stood up and said, "I'll do it!" " "Say that finish, the young man took off his T-shirt, revealing a strong muscle. The young girl looked at the handsome man shyly and admiringly, imagining his next move. I saw the young man throw the T-shirt to the girl and said, "Iron it! " !"

Xiaoming got a new haircut and came to school the next day. The students all laughed when they saw his new hairstyle: Xiao Ming, your head looks like a kite! Xiao Ming felt very wronged and ran outside to cry. . Cry, cry. . He flew. .

35. A zoologist went on an expedition to the Antarctic.

He asked a penguin, "What do you do every day?" ;

Penguin said, "I do three things every day, the first is to eat, the second is to sleep, and the third is to kiss." He asked 99 penguins in a row, and they all said so.

Finally, he asked the hundredth penguin, and the penguin said, "I do two things. First, I eat. Second, I sleep. "

The zoologist asked, "They all play kissing. Why don't you play?"

The penguin says, "... because I am kiss _ t! !"

Q: A rabbit races with a fast tortoise. Guess who won?

A: Rabbit ~ ~

Q: Wrong ~! It's a turtle. As mentioned earlier, it's a fast turtle. Run fast ~ ~

Q: The rabbit doesn't want to compete with a turtle wearing sunglasses. Who will pull this time?

A: Mm-hmm. Tuziba

Q: Wrong ~ ~! The tortoise took off her sunglasses, too! It's the fastest turtle again.

37. In the music class, the teacher played a Beethoven tune.

Xiaoming asked Xiaohua, "Do you know music?"

Xiaohua: "Yes"

Xiaoming: "Do you know what the teacher is playing?"

Xiaohua: "Piano."

38. A pair of corn fell in love.

So they decided to get married.

Wedding anniversary

A corn can't find another corn.

This corn asks the popcorn next to it: Have you seen our corn?

Popcorn: I hate it. I don't know anyone who perms hair.