A funny joke.

A complete collection of funny jokes

A complete collection of funny jokes. In daily life, we can watch more funny jokes in our spare time, which can relieve our work pressure and make ourselves laugh. Next, I will take you to know more about a funny joke book. A funny joke 1

1. In love, you should let your boyfriend cook, wash dishes, wash clothes and make money everywhere.

2. The main sports of contemporary youth: express delivery and take-away!

3. After entering the society, I discovered that I can't spell my parents, only Pinduoduo.

4. Women should either be beautiful or work hard. If they are beautiful and work hard, they can drag a little.

5. What keeps me going is not a grand ideal, but earning a lot of money and then buying it in buy buy.

6. The people who show love have changed wave after wave, and only I am single.

7. Some people said I was handsome, but I smiled because I was more handsome when I smiled.

8. Men like beautiful faces, while women like sweet words. So women wear makeup and men lie.

9. If you suddenly think of me one day, please pick up your mobile phone and dial my number. Even if I am busy and free, I will appear in front of you rain or shine as long as you say "I invite you to dinner". This is my lifelong commitment to my friends!

1. If you like someone, you have to declare it. Don't worry so much. Although there is a great possibility of failure, what if you become a spare tire? A funny joke 2

1. One day, Aries and a lion walked into a restaurant.

what did the boss say you wanted? The sheep said,' A set meal. Thank you.'

The boss asked again,' Isn't your lion hungry?'

the sheep said,' no.

the boss refused to give up and asked, really?

The sheep said yes

The boss was a little unwilling to ask,' Think again, is it really unnecessary?

The sheep growled impatiently: Do you think I can still be here if it is hungry?

2. A woman disguised as a man went to join the army, and she had her period on the battlefield. The company commander saw it and asked her to be carried away on a stretcher. She said nothing, and the company commander was anxious. He took off her pants and said, "What's nothing, JB was blown up and said nothing?" ！”

3. One night, the mother coaxed her 1-year-old son to sleep alone in his own room. The little guy just wanted his mother to sleep with him. The helpless mother said, "Are you ashamed? Such a big man needs his mother to sleep with him!"

"Dad needs you to sleep with him every day when he is older!" The son said confidently.

4. When I saw her with a shy face and a lovely expression, I couldn't help but feel a flutter in my heart and asked in a low voice, "Do you ... do you really like me?" She buried her head and said, "Guess!" "I like it ~" Her face is redder and her head is lower. "Guess again!"

5. In the bus, a standing pregnant woman said to the man sitting next to her, Don't you know I'm pregnant? I saw the man nervously say, "The child is not mine! ！”

6. A man was about to jump off a building, and his wife shouted: Honey, don't be impulsive, we still have a long way to go! After hearing this, the man swooped down. The policeman said, "You really shouldn't threaten him like this! ！”

7. The child is thinking about "heredity and environment". Mother interjected: "This question is very simple. Everyone knows that if a child is like a father, it is genetic." Like a neighbor, that is the environment. "

8. A couple went to register for marriage. "Have you had a premarital examination?" "Checked, his house. The cars are all gone. " "I mean to go to the hospital." The young woman blushed and whispered, "Yes, it's a boy."

9. Xiaodi MM took a swimming class for the first time. One hour later, she said to the coach, "I think, is that enough for today?" "Why?" "I really can't drink any more."

1. After the Tang Priest drove Wukong away, he met a monster again. He had to spell a hoop to call Wukong back for help. Soon, a loud voice came from the air: Sorry, the subscriber you called is not in the service area. Please try again later. Classic humorous jokes

1. There is no one at the bank window in the afternoon. There was a child lying on my counter playing with a pen, raising his head playfully, poking his hand at the glass, blinking his watery eyes and asking me, "Why are you locked up?" I smiled and said to him, "Because my sister doesn't study hard." He pouted, "You're lying." I said, "Really, I'm not lying to you." He shook his head and seriously refuted me: "You are lying. You are obviously an aunt."

2. My little niece just entered the first grade and got 74 points in a Chinese exam. When she came back with the report card, her parents were very angry and asked you why you only got 74 points. My niece buried herself in meditation for a long time and suddenly lifted it up. Her parents thought that she realized her mistake and pricked up her ears in expectation. My niece said firmly, "Because the teacher deducted 26 points from me!" "

3. My mother sent me a short message: "Your father is busy and fishing." I asked, "How many have you caught?" Mom: "Just three." I praised: "I will go fishing wherever I caught it." Mom: "I caught it in your fish tank."

4. I bought a bottle of water in the supermarket. Gave the cashier 2 yuan, and she took the money and looked before and after, shining the light and rubbing it with her hand, and then told another person that someone had used 2 yuan to buy things. When I received her change, I also read every one according to her routine. While looking at me, I said, now some supermarkets specialize in giving fake money to others ...

5. My cousin has a high-end mobile phone with fingerprint and facial recognition, which works well. Yesterday, she said that the mobile phone was broken and asked me to accompany her to repair it. The mobile phone was tested several times. The little brother who repaired the mobile phone looked at my cousin's round face and tight coat and said hesitantly, "Sister, have you gained weight recently, so face recognition is not working!" Later, the younger brother erased the original face recognition and re-recorded his cousin's fat face. Needless to say, the real mobile phone was ready immediately! This is really a sad story!

6. My wife had a whim and wanted to surprise her husband. So I put on a wig, put on a brand-new suit and put on a different makeup than usual. Then he went to Mr. Wang's office and said coquettishly, "Hey, handsome, do you want to date me?" His husband looked at her and immediately interrupted her and said, "No! I don't want anything. I think of my wife as soon as I see you. "

7. When I was engaged to my wife, I saw her wearing a pair of glasses, and I felt that she was very cultured and knowledgeable. Many facts after marriage prove that the reason why her eyes are nearsighted is only related to watching TV for a long time!

8. Don't look at me as fat. When it comes to losing weight, I'm a set of things. Don't look at me being single, but when it comes to love, I have a set of things; Don't look at me ugly, but when it comes to beauty, I'm a set of things; Don't look at me as poor, but when it comes to making money, I'm a set of things.

9. The office is a magical place. No matter how messy your desk is, even your mobile phone, wallet, car keys, real estate license and household registration book will not be touched for a month. But as long as your pen is out of sight for 1 minutes, it will disappear strangely!

1. Brother: "Xiaojin plays in the street after school, goes fishing by the river, or plays video games in the Internet cafe. He can do whatever he wants, how interesting! " Sister: "Because his parents are divorced, no one cares about him all day." Brother: "why don't our parents get divorced?" If they get divorced, I can be as happy as Xiaojin. No one forces me to do my homework. I can do anything. How comfortable I am! God, I dream of my parents getting divorced soon! "