The latest homophonic joke

1 "Beauty, our house utility rate is super high, and a small three-bedroom (three-bedroom) made of 80 square meters really suits you!"

"Suitable for your uncle, you are a junior!"

2A: Does that Faye Wong have a crush on Nezha?

Why do you say that?

A: Because I often hear her sing "When I miss you, you are making waves."

B: ...

3 "In order to avoid casualties, today's tournament will be over! Start the roll call, Huashan disciple! "

"here!"

"Wudang disciple!"

"here!"

……

"Since everyone is here, let's call it a day, dismissed!"

Starbucks entered Lingyin Temple and escaped into an empty door. There will be the following dialogue in the future:

"Donor, do you want great compassion (cup) or great compassion (cup)?"

"Master, can I continue to grieve?"

5 in the evening, Zheng Xidan's daughter-in-law couldn't find her husband, so she went to her neighbor's house to find her.

As soon as I entered the door, I saw my neighbor washing his hair and asked, "Uncle, where's Happy Egg?"

Hearing this, the neighbor was a little unhappy, ignored her and continued to wash her hair.

The daughter-in-law was a little annoyed and asked, "Uncle, where is Zheng Xidan?"

The neighbor was furious: "TM, I am washing my hair!" " "

6 "See Your Majesty, I have something important to say."

"Ai Qing, please speak."

"I, I forgot what I said to my lips. . . "

"Well, Ai Qing leaned back and recalled that as the saying goes, many people forget things when kneeling."

Q: When are you most anxious in a day?

A: 12: 59 because. . . Hurry up! ! ! ! !

8 Xiao Liu quarreled with his companion, who pointed to Xiao Liu and said, "You have seed! Wait for me. "

Hearing this, the passing diaosi took Xiao Liu's hand and said, "Wait a minute, brother, this is my mailbox!" " "

A: "I played chess with your father before. Once, your father had only one elephant left, and I had only one scholar left. So, I suggested that elephants and people cross the river, and your father agreed. Your father used his image as me, so I used your father. Your father used his image as me, and I used my taxi as your father. Your father is like me and I am like your father. Your father is like me, and I am your father ... "B:" Get out! "

10 in the morning, the boss said, "Would you like to find a place convenient for everyone to eat together at noon?"

So now the whole company is crowded in the bathroom, eating silently with lunch boxes.