Rural classic jokes

rural classic jokes

rural classic jokes, in life, there are many funny jokes, some of which are about rural areas. These jokes can not only bring people joy, but also add fun to their own lives. Let's share the rural classic jokes below. Rural classic joke 1

1. Han Er's brain is not normal. His brother made a fortune in Shanghai, so he booked a plane ticket on the Internet to let him fly there to learn. This is the first time for Han Er to fly in his life. He just walked into the cabin and sat down in the first class seat. After reading Haner's boarding pass, the stewardess politely said to him, Sir, you are economy class, please go to the back! Haner's stubborn temper came up: what's wrong? Bullying our rural people is honest! Why can't someone else sit here? The two sides were deadlocked and the plane could not take off. Finally, the captain came over, and after careful understanding of the situation, he found that Han Er's brain was abnormal. In order not to affect the normal take-off, he only came to this decision: Hello, I am the captain of this flight. The front seat of this flight is for Beijing, and the back seat is for Shanghai! Han Eryi immediately bounced up from his seat: Mama, I almost took the wrong seat! I didn't say so earlier! Why didn't this girl make it clear just now? Fortunately, the plane hasn't left yet! Then he mumbled and hurried straight to the back seat ...

2. The rural children in the 197s were obsessed with fruit candy, and today's children can't understand it. At that time, Erwa's classmate's house set up a candy stand at the street corner, with a fruit candy for every penny. Every day after school, Erwa has to stand for his mother, and several close classmates always wander around the candy stand like bees, drooling. One of the clever students came up with a bad idea: just open the candy paper and lick it before wrapping it. Anyway, no one knows that it can continue to sell! Later, his mother counted a lot of sweets every day, but found that the sweets were getting smaller and smaller! At first, Erwa insisted that the candy melted in the hot weather and was beaten up, so the poor Erwa classmate had to confess everything!

3. After working in other places for a few years, someone forgets his roots. Just back to the pond in my hometown, I saw an old man with a hat looking down for sweet potatoes, so I pointed to the duck swimming in the middle of the pond and asked the old man with a broken trump: Uncle, uncle, what bird is swimming in the middle of the water? The old man looked up and recognized that his youngest son was back. He was angry that his son had forgotten Ben after going out for a few years, so he replied grumpily: dog! I've only been out for a few years. Have you pulled out the sweet potato shit? I can't believe I don't even know ducks. What bird? Fart-eyed bird

4. Black Egg often quarrels with his wife. Every time, Black Egg rushes out to die in a rage. On this day, after quarreling with a black egg, she rushed out of the door and threatened to jump into the river. As a result, her daughter-in-law ignored him and went straight to sleep. The old yellow dog at home followed him to the river, jumping up and down excitedly, and accidentally bumped the black egg strolling by the river into the river. In winter, the cotton-padded jacket and trousers were all soaked, and the black eggs trembled with cold. There was no choice but to go home and knock: element fragrance, element fragrance, open the door! After knocking for a long time, there was a loud drink: didn't you jump into the river? What are you doing back here? Black eggs can't stand the cold, so I have to beg for mercy: I was wrong, and I won't dare again!

5. A fool went on a blind date, and the matchmaker told him repeatedly in advance: Please be gentle when you invite your mother's family to dinner later. I'll tie a twine on your leg, and then I'll pull you to take a bite of food, remember? The fool nodded and answered, remember. It was normal when I first started eating. Every time the matchmaker pulled the hemp rope, the fool took a bite of the dish. I didn't expect that an old hen suddenly ran under the table and just tripped over the rope. Now the fool tried his best to pick up vegetables, his mouth was full, and the rope was still pulling. The fool was anxious: You tried to choke me with a shovel! Rural classic jokes 2

Rural classic jokes 1. A rural aunt runs a pig farm, and a hundred pigs finally gain weight, so a group of law enforcement officers come and ask, "What are you feeding this pig?" Aunt told me truthfully: "swill, leftover soup, potato leaves and miscellaneous vegetables." The law enforcement officer's face sank: "This pork will be eaten by people in the future. How can you feed this kind of thing! A fine of three thousand! "

The next day, another group of law enforcement officers came and asked, "What are you feeding this pig?" Aunt learned well this time: "My pig is fed with rice and bread." Who knows that the face of law enforcement officers sank: "No! Now some people still don't have enough to eat. If you waste food like this, you will be fined 3,! "

On the third day, another group of law enforcement officers came and asked, "What are you feeding this pig?" Aunt thought for a long time and carefully replied, "My pig feeds leaves and grass." Who knows that the law enforcement officers still have a heavy face: "You pig don't feed pig food, but feeding leaves and grass doesn't destroy greening?" A fine of three thousand! " On the fourth day, another group of law enforcement officers came and asked, "What are you feeding this pig?" Aunt was angry at this moment and said coldly, "I don't need to feed this pig." Who knows that the law enforcement officers still face a heavy: "Do you grow fat if you don't feed this pig?" Aunt ha ha smiled and said,

"Yes, I give a pig ten dollars every day, and they buy whatever they want! !”

2. The country aunt has a son who was transferred to Shenzhen a long time ago, and soon became a deputy section chief, taking a "mistress" outside. The wife who lives in her hometown is anxious and tells her aunt. Aunt stamped her feet with anger. When the son went home to visit relatives, the aunt said nothing, grabbed the broom and hit it! The son knows what is going on in his heart. So while hiding from the broom, he said to his aunt, "Mom, don't worry. Listen to me. ""say what? ! "Aunt continue to play. After the classmate jumped away, he shouted to his mother, "Mom! Shenzhen is a special zone, do you know? The government has a document stipulating that you can marry two wives if you are above minor subjects!

"The government has documents? Aunt's broom stopped in mid-air, paused for a moment, and mumbled, "It's another matter to have files.

3. The country aunt and her daughter-in-law were at home, and two thieves broke into the house.

Aunt begged, "Brother Thief, leave us alone!"

Daughter-in-law said, "Yes, Uncle Thief, my family has nothing of value."

Aunt said, "Brother Thief, please."

Daughter-in-law said, "I will remember uncle thief's great kindness ..."

The two thieves couldn't stand it, so they simply stopped searching and slapped the table with a knife:

"Why, can you keep your mouth clean? ! Brother is called brother, but uncle is called uncle! Why are you a thief before the thief? "

4. A country aunt went to visit her son in the city. When she went to the bathroom, a big earthquake suddenly happened. When people dug her out of the ruins, she laughed and said, "This is really interesting. As soon as I pulled the toilet, the house fell down."

5. When a country aunt meets a neighbor's talented person, she always kisses him warmly and calls out, "Brother talented person", but yesterday, the talented person was a little unhappy. He sternly said to her, "I will ask for a post when I see you later. 〃

Aunt doesn't know what a position is, and she doesn't know that a talented person became the unit chief yesterday.

Early the next morning, my aunt met a talented person and greeted her in a proper manner: "Good morning, duty brother. 〃