Language and art information

There are many artistic jokes. I recommend some short messages. I hope they can use it!

1. God knew you were thirsty and created water. God knew you were hungry and created rice. God knows you have no lovely friends, so he created me. However, God knows that there is no fool in the world, and he created you by the way.

Someone told me that "you are as smart as a pig", and I was furious after listening to it! ! I know you! ! What an insult! I'm sorry about that pig!

3. When the Tang Priest took three disciples for a short rest, he went to Pig Bajie and said angrily, "You pig head, you still have leisure to read short messages!"

Please go to the nearest telephone pole and shout "My illness is saved" to the wild advertisement above.

Last night, I dreamed that you fell into a stinking cesspit. After climbing up, you said: after all, you have a good life, and even the cesspit smells good.

6. Deleting the address book. All information will be lost. A moment, please. ...

7. Chasing you, chasing you and I chasing you, just like a hunter chasing a fox; Kiss you, kiss you, I kiss you, just like an old man eating corn.

8. Bajie met an old man and asked, Shit! Yue Lao! Why did you separate me from Gao? Yue: She is a person, and you are a demon. I'm afraid your child will give birth to a shemale.

9. The people who come home from work are poor people, drunkards at 9 o'clock, perverts at 1 1, gamblers at 2-3 o'clock, and wild ghosts who don't go home!

10. Shuai Shuai is a handsome guy, but you should be the eldest brother, the taxi driver is the eldest brother, and the message taker is the pig.

1 1. Xiaoming always sleeps in class. The teacher criticized him: Can you stop sleeping? ? Xiao Ming replied: No, because I am a poor student.

12. I saw you wandering in the supermarket the other day. You put your hand into the machine that can check the price, and the result shows: Pig's trotters 8 yuan, you think there is something wrong with the machine, so you put your head in. I almost died laughing when I saw it: pig head 18 yuan!

13. Frankly speaking, I like you very much. Your eyes, walking posture, happy expression, coquetry and cuteness, and even the way you sleep fascinate me! But what annoys me most is that you don't catch mice and you keep losing your hair!

14. One day, we came to a wishing pool. I bent down and made a wish, and then threw a coin into the well. You wanted to make a wish, but when you bent down, you accidentally fell into the well. I was startled and muttered, How clever!

15. Do you have a TV? Watch CCTV 1. The White House was bombed and the whole building collapsed. The police have sealed off the whole of Washington, 19 people were killed, 32 people were injured, 1 1 people were missing. . . 1 person cheated!

16. Since ancient times, there has been a mathematical equation that is correct (A = B, B = C), so A = C, you = animal, animal = pig, so you = pig!

17. If a star falls on your head tonight, please don't worry. This is a gift from my God, and you will live a carefree and happy life from now on, because you are stupid.

18. Are you full today? Did you sleep well? Will it be cold late at night? I really want to be by your side quietly. I know you never take care of yourself. Whenever I leave, you jump out of the pigsty!

19. Beauty meets beauty. There are so many beautiful women. If you treat beautiful women, you can't get a wife.

20. Some people say you are a pig! I seriously criticized him! How is that possible? How can people tell what they look like?

2 1. Someone passed by the cemetery, heard a knock at the door, fell down and saw someone, so he was relieved and asked, why? They carved my tombstone wrong and are changing it!

22. Do you know, dear? You have lost a lot of weight recently! I see it in my eyes, but it hurts in my heart. It's almost the Spring Festival, but your health is worrying ... who doesn't want to let their pigs kill a few kilograms more!

23. I gave you the heaviest gift since you took a shit during the Chinese New Year. You will eat a catty and be full. If you think it's not enough, please help yourself.

24. Using SMS to kill time is called letter life. While sending and receiving letters, it is the climax of letters. It is indifference to only receive and not send them. The wrong object is letter harassment, and unsuccessful sending and receiving is letter dysfunction!

25. A person can be my lover forever; There is a kind of person who can be more affectionate with me and call them relatives; There is another person, I sold him, and he is still counting money. For example, you who read text messages are called idiots! Happy holidays!

I really want to leave this world with you and live in a secluded place with beautiful scenery. Just you and me, there is a piece of green grass in front of us. Lie on the grass when you are free and watch you eat grass gently! Happy April Fool's Day!

I saw you in the street. You are with someone. I saw at a glance that he was not a good man. He's been patting your ass behind you. I said to him angrily, stop the donkey driver in front! Happy April Fool's Day.

28. It is wood who makes furniture, scholars who know poetry, people who think about money, talents who practice, women who want to be in shape, geniuses who send messages and idiots who read text messages. Happy April Fool's Day.

29. Forward this message 3 times, and you will get lucky; Forward it 6 times and you will be official; Forward 10 times, and you will be lucky; Forward it 20 times and it will cost 3 yuan! Happy April Fool's Day.

30. There is a tacit understanding, a feeling called wonderful, a longing called longing, and an idiot who will finish reading the message! Happy April Fool's Day.