No matter how good your relationship with others is, don't tell others "these three things" easily, which will get you into trouble.

When getting along with others, everyone is eager to get the most perfect relationship, that is, getting along comfortably.

don't be suspicious of each other, don't cater to each other purposefully, communicate with each other, accommodate each other, tolerate each other, talk to each other and be true to each other. However, this kind of comfort is limited to your imagination.

Just because of human nature, you can't look directly at it.

Some people, you think you will be the most iron relationship, and it is likely that a small matter will make the relationship indifferent; Some people, you think they are brothers and honey is sisters, but it is very likely that you have just told them your little secret, and when you turn around, it will spread to everyone around you.

There was a saying in "Augmented Sages": Speak a few words to everyone, but not all all of my heart.

It can be seen that our ancestors told us a long time ago that we must keep three points when talking to people, otherwise you will see: some relationships "turn against each other when they turn against each other", some people will really "leave tea alone" after leaving, and some brothers will turn against each other when they turn against each other; Some people treat each other sincerely on weekdays, but now they have become villains ...

It is said that it is hard to find a bosom friend in life, but it is the hardest to find a bosom friend through the ages.

So, since you can't be a bosom friend, you should understand that no matter how good the relationship is, you should never tell others everything with your heart to heart.

The more you talk about the following three things, the more trouble you bring to yourself.

Jiang Xun once mentioned in his review of A Dream of Red Mansions that Qin Keqing's death was not due to illness, but was forced to rape by her father-in-law, Jia Zhen, so she hanged herself in Tianxiang Building.

Cao Xueqin's ten-year deletion and revision finally covered up this unspeakable scandal in the family. Zhi Yanzhai once commented on this chapter: Xue Qin is really kind. That is to say, Mr. Cao's attitude is that it is better not to say anything in the face of domestic scandals.

In fact, when Wang Xifeng took Jia Baoyu to visit Qin Keqing a while ago, there was a "crawling ash" cursed by Jiao. He had already told readers the relationship between his father-in-law and his daughter-in-law.

So, even an immortal writer like Cao Xueqin seems to be a documentary, but in fact, just like when we kept a diary as children, we are worried that it will be seen by adults, and there will be some encryption, so we can also see the charm of the characters in A Dream of Red Mansions.

Therefore, ordinary people are like us. If we have a dirty laundry, it's better to try to hide it.

You think that if you tell others, they will treat you sincerely accordingly. It is very likely that at present, others will say a few words of comfort to you, turn around and take this as a joke they heard and spread it to everyone.

by then, it will be too late for you to regret.

Many people, who are friendly on the surface, wish that you have something behind your back, so that he can grasp it, and wish that you are not as good as him, so that he can feel more superior.

Therefore, family affairs, in the final analysis, or family affairs, no matter whether they are handled perfectly or not, are hidden in their own "home", and it is better to talk less when something happens to people.

the so-called bustling world is all about profit, and the bustling world is all about profit.

it is very realistic between people.

if you have money, others will come to flatter you; if you have no money, others will stay away from you.

However, having money and not having money is never the decision of others, but how much wealth you can grasp in your own hands.

great things can only be achieved if money is kept secret. The more you parade around the city, the more you show off to everyone, and the more shallow and ignorant people are. Even if there is money now, it is difficult to keep it.

In ancient times, there was a word called "a gentleman on a beam", which meant that thieves always liked to steal money from beams.

why is it on the beam? Because there was no bank in ancient times, and ordinary people didn't have much money, they all put money in strings and hung it on the beams, so thieves became the so-called "gentlemen on the beams."

And the people he's eyeing must be those with "exposed wealth". You brag during the day and are likely to attract thieves at night.

so, no matter whether you have money or not, you must hide something.

You should know: if you have money, others will miss you, maybe they will borrow money from you every three days, and some people will even be jealous of you, giving you a stumbling block and secretly calculating you; You have no money, and when you are down and out, others will guard against you, afraid that you will come to borrow money from them and stay away from you.

Therefore, the best way to deal with people is not to tell others about your financial situation at will, no matter how good your relationship is, don't show off your wealth, let alone cry poor.

remember, keeping your money hidden is the best protection for yourself.

Maybe when everyone talks about their ideals, they may not always be "rich and shining", just because in this world, people really have different aspirations.

However, if you come from a poor family, and the starting point is not as good as others, you always reveal your ambition to others. Most of the time, what you get is not the support of others, but the fake coping and the ridicule behind it.

Or, your ideal is to be a bus driver, or a kindergarten teacher, etc., so most people will insinuate that your ideal is "really great" and joke that you have no lofty aspirations.

Therefore, it is better to keep the ambition of a gentleman in your heart.

If you like to write novels, write more books with a stuffy head, and be modest and low-key, which is always the right way; You like the galloping of business, so even if you are cheated by the pit, you must stand the blow, not to mention complaining about how much you have suffered, how much you have been cheated, and how much you have earned. You like to be steady in the establishment, so you should do a good job in the present, don't brag about how carefree you are when you meet people, and don't complain everywhere that the leaders are not ...

People, ambition equals ideals.

many people have set their ambitions, but few of them can stick to them on the way to realization.

In life, you will see that the more silent those people are, the more successful they are, and the more they are clamoring all day, the more difficult it is to achieve, just because the more they make public, others will not like it and want to give him some color to see.

So, even if the relationship is no matter how good or close, we should remember: what we should say and what we shouldn't say should be a little shrewd.

in a dream of red mansions, there is a saying: everything is learned, and people's understanding is an article.

It means that if you know the way of the world, you won't get yourself into trouble, and if you know the way of the world, you won't show off or make public, and you are truly learned.

it's better to keep your own affairs in your heart, so that you can live clearly.

Conclusion:

Zhou Guoping once said a sentence that deeply touched me:

The word "distance" here has two meanings. The first is that you can maintain your inner autonomy in the face of your external experience. In other words, you have your own choice under any circumstances; The second meaning is that you can maintain inner peace in the face of encounters. In other words, you have an open mind.

so, we get along with others, in fact, the same is true.

The more peaceful and calm you are, the less you will reveal everything and let others judge you at will. However, if you can accept any remarks made by others, no matter what you say, you don't care whether others are mocking or praising you, and no matter what happens in the future, you can keep up with them, and you can speak freely without scruple.

But most people can't bear the eyes of others. China people, in particular, pay attention to a "face". Once many thoughts are on the body, they will be troubled and regretful because of some trivial matters. In the face of others' "bad", you are even more powerless to resist, so you will probably regret that you can't keep the door open.

nan huaijin once said: How many secrets must a person hide before he can spend his life skillfully.

so, in the final analysis, you have to keep your mouth shut and your heart shut in order to live freely.

so, please always remember: in this life, people keep secrets, not that you are not open-minded, but that you don't get yourself into trouble; Don't talk nonsense, not that you are insincere, but that you have the ability to protect yourself.