Please translate it into English. My English is really not afraid of making jokes. "Hey Billy, I've been thinking about it for a long time, whether to write this to you or not, because

Hey Billy, I don't want to write this to you for a long time, because you know I'm not good at expressing. I'm sorry, I think I screwed up our relationship, because I'm not brave. Although we haven't met yet, I want you to know that I love you, no matter what you are, no matter what our future development direction is, maybe you have a girlfriend now, otherwise, I just think our understanding is a kind of fate, and I cherish it, no matter what. But I don't want you to think that I don't care too much about you. I'm glad that you gave me a lot of happy times at my worst. Thank you Billy. I hope you will recover soon and wish you a happy life. Then I really think of you. I'm sorry, I don't know why. "