Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Funny phrases and sentences that are humorous and high-spirited

Funny phrases and sentences that are humorous and high-spirited

Humorous and funny phrases and sentences

1. Why does God always take a nap when I am unlucky?

2. Sometimes, I dream about "eating to hold on".

3. Take a newspaper to the toilet. I am a scholar.

4. I will look for you in the next life, because besides me, you are the stupidest person.

5. When arguing, the difference between men and women is like the difference between a rifle and a machine gun.

6. Grandfathers are all descendants...

7. Women have countless QQ accounts just to tease a man. Men often use a QQ account to fill it with all kinds of things. All kinds of women...

8. Don’t be afraid of enemies like tigers, but afraid of teammates like pigs!

9. The bank said when charging: "This is in line with international practice." When serving But he said: "China's national conditions must be considered."

10. Don't come to me if you have nothing to do, and don't come to me if you have something to do.

11. The reason why angels can fly is because they take themselves very lightly...

12. Hugging is really a strange thing. You are so close but you can’t see it. each other's faces.

13. House prices are getting higher and higher, so there are fewer and fewer good men...

14. How to give MM an unforgettable birthday? Beat her up first, Then I will send you the housing certificate of the most expensive real estate in Guangzhou, which is guaranteed to be unforgettable and surprising!

15. After my wife saw some photos of my girlfriends I had in college, she kept praising me for not being lewd...

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17. I can’t stand this kind of merchants the most - the sign says: Demolition, sell it for money! I gave her a down jacket for RMB, but she just wouldn’t sell it. It’s so deceptive to consumers!

18. Being handsome is useless! In the end, you won’t be eaten by pawns!

19. No one knows what just happened, and I have become accustomed to covering everything up with a smile.

20. In the days when there were no women, I enjoyed teasing men...

21. A woman is like a book on a bookshelf. Although you buy her, before you buy it, She has been fucked by several men more or less...

22. Now it seems that movies that can be understood by IQ are the most popular, and those who like these movies also like to watch Korean dramas!

23. Today is Pi Day, so we have to eat pie~

24. Korean scholars believe that Sun Wukong is actually a Korean god because he uses a stick!

25 , How can you have the strength to lose weight if you don’t eat enough?

26. The ball was scored by the goalkeeper.

27. Praising a female classmate in person: You are really like a hibiscus coming out of clear water!!

28. How did you die? You didn’t die of poverty.

29. There is a one-yuan coin in the flower bed, but the sign beside the flower bed reads "Step into the flower bed, you will be fined three yuan!", which is really embarrassing.

30. If you have to pay taxes when you look in the mirror, I am afraid some women will go bankrupt.

31. A man wants to divorce his wife after he makes money, but his wife wants to divorce him when he cannot make money.

32. When a man has an affair, he becomes busier and busier at work, while when a woman has an affair, the food she cooks becomes saltier.

33. When a woman says "hate" to you, it means she likes you. When a man says "hate" to you, he really hates you.

34. Traditional men are pure before marriage and start messing around after marriage; modern men are messy before marriage and become honest after marriage.

35. No matter how bad the relationship between a man and his wife is, his relationship with his mother-in-law is still good; no matter how good the relationship between a woman and her husband is, her relationship with her mother-in-law is also bad.

36. Roses are so cheap that you can give them to your wife.

37. As long as you can dance well with a hoe, is there any corner that cannot be dug down?

38. Who hasn’t encountered two scumbags when they were young?

39. The robber said a wise saying when robbing the bank: Don’t touch anything! Money belongs to the country, but your life is yours!

40. Do you think you walk like QQ? Just like logging in, it's bouncy.

41. Being handsome is useless, but in the end, he will not be eaten by the pawns.

42. In ancient times, there was Ximen Qing, and now there is Edison Chen; when Xiaoxi saw Xiaoxi, he showed off his camera.

43. Be like Edison Chen and bring a camera when booking a hotel.

44. People in the upper class always like to do some obscene things.

45. Don’t seek to be a good match, just seek to feel qualified.

46. Women are anxious when men do not make money, and women regret when men make money.

47. I can’t find my tie again. Did you not find the rag yesterday?

48. Those women who participated in the beauty pageant could not find a good man, because good men Men are all married, like me.

49. When I think about the unification of the motherland, I can’t help but want to smoke...

50. If I become the emperor, I will make you the prince! A tall and positive talk

1. Joy is the station of life, pain is the voyage of life.

2. It is okay to fail. It’s okay to cry. But you must not lose your courage and confidence in yourself.

3. Only with struggle can we make progress, only with struggle can we achieve results, and only with struggle can we succeed.

4. Stay optimistic and positive, go against the sunshine and move forward!

5. Don’t have too big a goal in life. If you identify one thing, devote your interest and enthusiasm to it, and you will succeed.

6. True courage is not to overwhelm everything, but not to be overwhelmed by everything.

7. People must have dreams in order to have the motivation to move forward.

8. No matter how hard and tired you are, as long as you keep moving forward, your scenery will eventually appear.

9. Life is like a cup of tea. It is only bitter for a while, but it will not last forever.

10. Success does not come in the future, but is accumulated continuously from the moment you decide to do it.

11. Perseverance is the only way to victory.

12. Just be responsible for the wonderful things God has arranged.

13. The most difficult time is when we are not far from success.

14. Instead of worrying too much, it is better to give it a go.

15. Courage is not about not feeling fear, but about continuing to do something even if you feel fear.

16. Thinking too much will destroy you. Keep your feet on the ground and do what you need to do in front of you, so that you will not be let down in the future.

17. To overcome the anxiety and depression in life, you must first learn to be your own master.

18. I want to give up every day, but I persist every day. A child without an umbrella must run hard.

19. Don’t let too much yesterday occupy your today!

20. Don’t let down the youth you should have struggled for.

21. In the future, you will definitely be grateful to yourself for working hard now.

22. The so-called life is to get up and walk away with a smile no matter how painful your heart is.

23. Only through struggle can you step onto the ladder of success, step by step, and achieve final victory.

24. Everyone has ups and downs. Dust yourself off and keep walking.

25. Try to avoid pain and discomfort in the future and live a good life.

26. Without wind and waves, there would be no brave trendsetters; without thorns, there would be no unyielding pioneers.

27. No matter how miserable life is, it cannot stop our strong fighting spirit and firm smile.

28. Only after trying it did you know that you can survive anything if you grit your teeth.

29. You must be brave once in your life. Even if you have nothing, you must fight regardless of everything.

30. Hope is the belief that leads people to success. If there is no hope, nothing will be achieved.

31. If you know where to go, the whole world will make way for you.

32. The most wonderful thing in life is not the moment when you realize your dream, but the process of persisting in your dream.

33. Complain less and love more. You will have everything you want.

34. No one needs to complain anymore. After all, your own story must be completed by yourself.

35. When you are in despair, look up and see that the light of hope is always there. QQ talk about tall and unique boys

1. Please take my ashes with you and throw them out when you encounter bad people. Let me protect you for the last time!

2. When I saw you fighting for me, you were really handsome at that time.

3. Daughter-in-law, you don’t have to do anything, I will take care of you for the rest of your life.

4. I have achieved half of my goal of becoming a wealthy person. At present, I am very rustic...

5. Brothers and women will always come first to me

6. You are not the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, but you are definitely me The most beautiful existence inside.

7. As long as it hasn’t happened yet, I can just ignore it because we are brothers. I hope you won’t let me down.

8. Today, the goddess is seventeen years old!

9. It is the spiritual sustenance of a group of men.

10. It is not a sin for a man to cry.

11. No matter how far or wide the road is, as long as I hold you, you will be safe.

12. Men, you must remember that no matter how powerful your opponent is, you cannot fall. Remember that there is a woman you love behind you.

13. Men should stand up straight, don’t lie down, and don’t wipe away tears easily.

14. No matter how miserable a man is, he is not afraid of having a dream in his heart to conquer the world.

15. What to do if your balls hurt? Just rub them and move on!

16. Some people say that men are only lower body animals.

17. No brother can get everything he wants, only he can do it.

18. If you are handsome, you will die quickly; if you are ugly, you will live longer.

19. I feel like boys have never been reliable.

20. I have to admit that men always like to go crazy

21. Women’s summer is men’s spring.

22. I am not a social person, but there are people in the society.

23. The world of men should not be disturbed by animals like women!

24. As soon as I go out, birds will fly across thousands of mountains and every trace of people will disappear.

25. A man may not be handsome, but he must look like a man.

26. Every man will have several brothers.

27. Whoever is willing to spend the 11.11 Festival with me this year, I will let her spend Mother’s Day next year.

28. If you don’t love something, just say you don’t love it. Don’t let labor and management tell you that we are not suitable.

29. It’s time for brothers to get together!

30. If you don’t have money, what can you do to keep your beloved Ma Zi?

31. My life is in tragedy, which shows that God makes me strong.

32. A man is the one who can forgive a woman’s lies.

33. Flowers are beautiful, but they are not as beautiful as you in my heart.

34. If I can’t be your prince, I will be your knight.

35. Girl, turn on the Bluetooth and send me some love.

36. I have mastered 100 ways to love my girlfriend, but now I am missing a girlfriend.

37. If you play with your feelings, I will make you cry rhythmically.

38. I want someone to let me go crazy with her, make trouble with her, and pamper her to the point of being lawless.

39. Every naughty little boy will eventually grow into a tall and strong father

40. As long as my parents are alive, my brothers will not be separated, and my lover will not leave. You can go to hell with everything else

41. For those who laugh at my jokes, one day I will laugh at you.

42. Don’t mess with me, I’ll beat myself up when I’m angry.

43. I am fascinated by the beautiful man’s mole between oppa’s eyebrows.

44. When I am strong, I will destroy your world!

45. If you don’t study well all day long, if you don’t take a shower for a whole month, if you run away for a whole year, you will reflect on yourself for the whole life!

46. If you are too tall and weak, don’t get close to labor.

47. I’m not the king of facial expressions, so I can’t express the kind of anxiety you want.

48. It is called love to coax your own daughter-in-law without being embarrassed.

49. For this monthly exam, I decided to hide my strength...

50. A good man should be like a panda, he only likes to eat one thing in his life, he should be gentle, gentle and docile. A classic talk about high-level positive energy

1. Joy is the station of life, and pain is the voyage of life.

2. It can fail. It’s okay to cry. But you must not lose your courage and confidence in yourself.