Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - In short, I remembered the days when I learned to drive in a driving school and talked about classic jokes.
In short, I remembered the days when I learned to drive in a driving school and talked about classic jokes.
Is the steering wheel your object? Hold it tightly.
3. Change lanes to the right and turn into a left turn signal. The coach said to me, "Why, confuse the enemy behind?"
The coach said that after you learn your driver's license, you will go to the last class to learn to fly a plane, so there will be only heaven soon.
5. Will the brakes burn your feet? Don't step on it!
When you buy a car, remember to tell people not to install a horn for you. Anyway, you rely on yelling.
7. "You must wear a helmet when driving out." "Why?" "I'm afraid people will get off and hit you."
8. "Sorry, coach, I stopped awry again." "No way, the road is crooked."
9. Taking the second exam, I was so nervous that I rummaged around.
10. See the person in front? Is it bad to kill him? This is not good. Why the fuck didn't you brake? !
1 1. If the red light is off and the green light is off, why isn't there a color you like?
12. I drive meat dogs better than you.
13. Turn the steering wheel to get there. Go back! I'll call you back!
14. Coach: Turn off the steering wheel. Me: Kill who?
15. Are you trying to kick me out by stepping on the brakes like this?
16. Change it. I can't teach you.
17. The steering wheel killed the clutch and trampled it to death.
18. Coach: Come on. Intern: OK, thank you. Coach: I told you to step on the gas. Come on!
19. It's not your fault that the driving is not good, but our coach is worthless.
20. You drove my Volkswagen out of the sound of a sports car!
2 1. The ramp is too narrow. Turn the steering wheel left and right. The coach said, are you here to screen chaff or drive?
22. Report to the coach that everything is ready and request to take off.
23. You can't even play the steering wheel well. What are your hands for?
24. Why are you holding the steering wheel so hard? Should I drag it down and take it home?
25. I just got my driver's license today. The coach told me earnestly: Can you try not to drive in the future?
If you like this steering wheel, you can take it with you when you leave later.
27. I used to think that I didn't know how to learn to drive, regardless of the southeast, northwest and northwest.
28. In the third quarter, the green light started slowly. The coach said, What's the matter? Can't you choose your favorite color?
29. In this way, 100 points.
30. My coach said he wouldn't go out if he got the certificate. Tell him on the way.
Let's talk about a classic sentence in the circle of friends.
First, the world is too big and life is too short. Who knows how long it will take the grass and trees in the reincarnation to return to this world and walk again. It's all because you study too little, are not busy enough, and live a wonderful life. If you choose a distant place, you will only care about the hardships. Tell yourself how much time you have. Have a good discussion with yourself and go to hell. Suffering is your food.
Second, I don't know where to start. We are used to blaming reality from beginning to end for everything we can't do. Actually, what does this have to do with reality? In the final analysis, all breakups and separations are just not enough love or love deeply enough, so when the setbacks are poor and the distance strikes, the hands of two people will be scattered. In fact, what we need most is someone who can firmly believe in the future with ourselves, not someone who always uses reality as an excuse to push us away.
The more you grow up, the more lonely you get, not because you grow up, but because your little friends grow up and they find that people like you are not worth socializing with.
When there is hatred in a person's heart, he is the first victim.
Love can make you not lonely, but it can't make you not lonely. Even the dearest love and the dearest lover can't and shouldn't replace themselves. Many times, we need to talk to ourselves, and don't impose this responsibility on our lover. As independent people, we should take responsibility and take good care of our lives and emotions.
If your best friend speaks ill of her boyfriend in front of you, don't go along with it easily, otherwise the day after they make up, your best friend will think that it was you who spoke ill of her boyfriend yesterday.
Seven, the root of our pain is often that we overestimate our position in the hearts of others.
Don't confuse my personality with my attitude. My personality comes from who I am and my attitude depends on who you are.
At that time, we all liked to use words. It's like finally having a holiday, finally graduating, finally leaving here, and finally celebrating the New Year, as if any farewell is like a relief. Finally, we found that the self-righteous liberation is what people miss. Nothing will wait for you, just like all the people parted ways at the end of the song. Unfortunately, they didn't leave each other well. Lu sihao
Ten, people's final outcome is the same, but you see yourself complicated. As the saying goes, never take yourself seriously. People who cheat you once will never give up the chance to cheat you again. Don't have any illusions about liars. Improving one's position by belittling others can only expose one's ignorance.
Xi。 I am willing to go through fire and water, as you wish; You don't want it. I'll do everything to stop it.
Twelve, growth is not gained all the way, but lost all the way.
Thirteen, beauty refers to the old world if dust. We are still a drop in the ocean after all.
Fourteen, youth is a state of mind. If you can choose, no one wants it to die. If I could go back in time, what would I say to myself? I think it's nothing. Only in this way can youth be suspenseful and interesting.
Fifteen, many beautiful things are waiting, not robbed, and waiting requires patience. When we lose patience, it is also the time when we pass by happiness. But people who are patient often have the last laugh. So don't worry, the good thing is yet to come!
In fact, I have always understood that it is not easy to accompany someone all the time.
Seventeen, sometimes you don't know what despair is without hard work.
Eighteen, too impetuous feelings can withstand the fleeting time of death, but they can't survive the ordinary and silent life.
Nineteen, deep feelings are not comparable to shallow cities, but psoriasis.
Twenty, someone will always accompany you to swallow the bitter fruit and taste a little dream.
2 1. People will never be satisfied. What you want when you have nothing; Want more after having some; After having everything, I hope to be as happy as when I have nothing. But walking on this road is actually powerless.
Twenty-two, why is the secret love so good? Because unrequited love never falls in love, I am happy when you smile for many days. I remember your words for many years.
It is said that everyone needs a mirror, so that they can always look at themselves and know what they are. But people who know themselves don't need to look in the mirror at all; It's no use looking at what you don't know in the mirror.
Twenty-four, watch the flowers bloom and wait for the flowers to fall.
I like you and I want to be with you. I will tell the world loudly, boldly and confidently.
Twenty-six, many times the truth is hidden in a joke. It's just that the speaker has a heart, but the listener has no intention.
27. People who are hot and cold to you just use you to fill his loneliness. Don't believe the sweet words of people who disappear for several days in a row. We all know the truth in feelings, but we dare not face it. Always willfully help each other find some excuses to deceive themselves. Maybe one day when you are tired, you won't be stubborn.
28. Be optimistic, prepare for the worst and accept all the realities at the same time.
If you don't like your present job, either quit or shut up. When I was young, I was often arrogant and arrogant. Can't do big things and don't want to do small things. Don't get into the habit of being picky. Too lazy to open an umbrella on rainy days, afraid of getting wet, showing dissatisfaction everywhere. Remember to do it well if you don't do it.
30. Find a good-looking person to accompany you. Only at the end of time will there be a long river of water.
I'm good to you, good, good. You don't need it. You don't care. You don't cherish it. When you think of me when you are hurt one day, I will never be so desperate as I am now, because I have already lowered you. It turns out that lowering a person is finally forced out by the other party!
No matter how strong the love is, it can't stand the erosion of busyness. You are so busy that you forget to care about you. You are so busy that you are exhausted. But love will only be cherished when you are free.
202 1 friends circle say a classic sentence.
First, people's temperament is mostly natural, some people are quiet in their bones, and some people are restless in their bones. As the saying goes, a leopard cannot change his spots. But the enlightenment of the day after tomorrow is also particularly important. If a quiet person is exiled in the noisy market, it is inevitable that he will not be moved by glitz. And putting an impetuous person in the temple forest can also be purified. Many people have gradually changed themselves in a subtle time, familiar and unfamiliar, unfamiliar and familiar.
Second, if we give our hearts to others, we can't take them back; When others give it to others, love will circulate in the world.
I left you the most beautiful smile in my life, but you will never see my tears.
Fourth, don't linger every day, keep in touch, you know he won't leave, he knows you won't change, maybe this is the best love!
Fifth, the best day: today; The simplest: making mistakes; The biggest obstacle: fear; The biggest mistake: giving up on yourself; The root of all evil: selfishness; The best leisure activity: work; The heaviest frustration: discouragement; The best teacher: children; Top priority: communication; The happiest thing: helping others; The biggest shortcoming: bad temper.
6. He doesn't like you. It's no use showing up at his side on purpose. The candy you gave him is not sweet. What are you doing from time to time? In his eyes, it's like harassing text messages. He can't understand your thoughtfulness in status update. He will be indifferent if you cry to death. He is your life background, and you are just a passer-by in his life. Love is not humble, not arrogant, just ordinary.
Seven, learn to adapt and make your environment bright; Learn to be tolerant and let your life be trouble-free; Learn to give and make your life full of sunshine. In fact, the sky is blue, and the clouds will always disperse; In fact, the sea is not wide, and the other shore is connected with this shore; In fact, the dream is very shallow and everything is natural; In fact, tears are sweet when your heart is willing. Seeing the world with emotion is a tragedy, watching comedy with reason!
8. Never overestimate your position in the eyes of others. In fact, you are nothing, not much more than you, not much less than you.
Nine, I am thinking about the world. After parting, there will always be a young day. I'm always tortured by reality. I am old and no one can understand. Everyone is happy in the end. At least God won't give you a forever sad world. Learn to adjust and take parting as the beginning of gathering. My heart seems to be open-minded. Learn to put yourself in the other's shoes and observe everything around you from different perspectives, and you will get different results.
Ten, the journey of life, just like the change of four seasons, the breeze is soft and the rain is soft, the flowers bloom and fall, and the ground is constantly opposite. Deep margin, shallow margin, scattered margin, and constant experience. Perhaps life itself is suffering from constant strewn at random, always trying to keep something, but later found that there are not many that belong to us. It took a long time to gradually understand that those who have passed through life are changing with time and slowly drifting away.
Sometimes, I like listening to songs not because they sound good, but because the lyrics are written like myself. Sometimes, it's not that others take you too lightly, but that you take others too seriously. Memory is a wonderful thing. It lives in the past and exists in the present, but it can affect the future.
Twelve, how many times to meet, to get to know a person. How much turbulence does it take to see a person's heart clearly? I can't stand falling in love too early, waiting for meeting too late, hurting too little fate, and loving too many peaches. True love is neither too early nor too late, neither too much nor too little, it is you, it is you.
Thirteen, I didn't expect the taste of parting to be so bleak. I didn't know saying goodbye was so strong.
Fourteen, when you are in love, you dare not devote yourself wholeheartedly, for fear of losing your lover and the whole world. But you should know that it is unfair to keep this idea for the other half, because no one in the world falls in love because of breaking up.
Fifteen, marriage is rebirth, divorce is the end, rebirth needs blessing, and there is no need to look back when it is over.
In the future, there will be books, love, sunshine and music in our life. On every sunny day, you and I sit next to each other and look at the books in our hands. When we are tired, we will put down our books and chat all over the world, or recite the poems we have just read, or go shopping hand in hand and come home with fresh fruits and vegetables in our hands. The light is on, and we taste the world together.
Sometimes, inadvertently, I received so much sunshine and warmth, as if there was a sudden undercurrent in my heart, and many unspeakable feelings poured out. In fact, no matter where you are, no matter where you are, people are thinking about you, your words, your words and those enduring sentences.
I left you the most beautiful smile in my life, but you will never see my tears. I can't bear to lose your warmth in this life, but I forget that scars will always hurt. That unspeakable sadness is enough to drown me. However, the irresistible temptation of sadness is deeply doomed to be just a disaster caused by stubbornness. Deduct love like torture, is it the years or the temptation you set for me?
Nineteen, the right time, meet the right person, destined to meet a spring flower. Such an encounter, without labels, is full of the most suitable temperature, and Bai Lianhua is in full bloom in each other's hearts. No matter when and where, they can always be soul mates, and the tacit understanding is like the sum of the piano and the harp. Such an encounter, like a poem falling into the dust in the sky, is extremely elegant, like dancing notes, lightly composed into a song, solo a complete life movement.
Twenty, waking up at dawn every day is a farewell to yesterday and a surprise for yourself. Because I spent a long night, I am glad that I am still alive. Although I am humble, I will continue to trudge in the long river of life, but after all, I am a vivid life, I can truly feel everything in the world, including friendship, affection and love, and I will be truly compatible with everything in the world.
Twenty-one, no matter how many things are outside, they are just a robe. Naked, alone. It's just sound. It won't leave any trace. Happiness comes from your heart. Clean, clear and cool. These cool words were supposed to let us know, don't be too busy with anything, it doesn't matter if it's cold.
22. I didn't take the initiative to chat with you for no reason, nor did I reply to your message for no reason. Whether you like it or not, others are obvious.
Twenty-three, don't say sorry to me, sorry can only get your peace of mind, not my relief.
24, the quality of life, can be understood as a kind of spiritual order, live in the storm, save your mind, complete the transition from impetuous to gentle, dissolve the sadness in life, improve the atmosphere of the mind, be gentle and considerate, understand life, treat pain, let go of those entanglements, even when you are sad, you will not hit your face with cactus. A good quality of life requires a top mentality.
Twenty-five, life is between dreams and waking. Walking on the road is nothing more than autumn leaves falling, in the process of drifting. I thought a lot at first, and gradually calmed down. Some things are like water in the palm of your hand. Whether you hold it tightly or with your heart, it will eventually flow away from your fingers drop by drop. Between walking, the feeling of chaos.
Say a classic sentence
1. What exactly is a black hole? In fact, for you, some people are just like black holes, indifferent to everything they do, devouring all your happiness and joy. No matter how much energy is generated, quietly go to TA. Even if it burns out and becomes light, it can't pass. Live a good life and stay away from black hole people.
Second, Zhao Ye replied to a short email, which was similar to Qiao Burning's style. He said: In the past, it was difficult for sea water to touch water. Qiao Ran's reply is also very short, with the words "Zhao Ye style" written on it. He said, you bastards.
Third, fragmentary memories, looking forward to a long time to piece together. Like broken glass, but independent and complete!
Fourth, don't be afraid. No matter what kind of setbacks or sadness you encounter, don't be afraid Yes, Qilu said, the person you love the most will leave, and your hard work will collapse. The more you pay attention to many things and people, the more you will be given a hard knife. But don't be afraid. Life is metabolism again and again. When the old people leave you, there will be new people to protect you. Sometimes parting is a kind of rebirth.
Not every effort will be rewarded, but every effort must be rewarded, which is an unfair and irreversible proposition.
Six, you will see the whole process of the world from clear to fuzzy, and your heart will become clear at the moment of tear drops.
Seven, some people have missed, never go back to the past; Some people will never be together even if they meet. These are unforgettable pains!
Eight, trekking in the years, everyone has their own story, only when they are pessimistic will they be beautiful, and when they are optimistic, they will be brilliant. Take a break when you are tired, dance with the wind, be quiet when you are bored, stare at the flowers and plants, slow down when you are anxious, and smile at yourself.
Be happy when you are alive, because we will die for a long time.
Ten, broken, just the right pleasure.
Eleven, use less digital products.
Twelve, don't give yourself a hard time. No matter how good others are, they are others. No matter how miserable you are, you are yourself, your unique self. Try to be yourself, and you will definitely give yourself the biggest surprise. The price of admiring others is to lose yourself. What others have, you may not have it, and what you have, others may not have it. Appreciate yourself, be kind to yourself and manage yourself well, and one day you will shine brilliantly. Life does not seek to compare with others, but to surpass ourselves.
Thirteen, only to find that his appearance is just a passer-by arranged by God to give you a class.
14. Most proud women marry humble men, and most proud men marry humble women.
Fifteen or three days is not long, nor is it short. But for feelings, enough to end is enough to start.
Sixteen, I think a person's courage is to delete his mobile phone number, QQ number, and so on. Try to keep your distance from him. Waiting for one day, I am used to not thinking about him, getting used to his absence, and getting used to the time to wear away his figure in your memory. And now, I have an epiphany. The real release is to keep all his contact information, but no longer expect him to contact far and near, just an extremely common one in your phone book.
17. If you want to be a better self, you must see a bigger world, know more wonderful people and learn more extensive knowledge. You don't need too much praise from others, because you know how good you are. The strength of the heart is always better than the glitz of the appearance.
Life is about cherishing what you have and waiting patiently for what you will get.
Nineteen, if I can see my back, I think it must be very sad, because I left happiness in front!
Twenty, popularity is often not a resource, but a kind of dependence, an invisible force. Friends are your backing and can give you the most timely help when you are in trouble. Therefore, when dealing with interpersonal relationships, especially those between friends, we must not be harsh on others, let alone those who are narrow-minded, greedy for petty advantages and vengeful will eventually be punished.
At that moment, we were all very happy.
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