There are some funny jokes about rice that I want to tell my boyfriend to make him laugh.

Brother-in-law: "nephew! Is Big Brother at home? "

Sister-in-law: "He is out. Come on in. I am washing dates and washing them for you. "

Brother-in-law: "Take a bath? Then I'll go first! "

Sister-in-law: "Don't go, don't worry, just change the water for me."

Brother-in-law: "The water is at the door."

Sister-in-law came out with jujube: "Is jujube delicious?"

Brother-in-law: ". . . . . . . "

A young woman coaxed her child to sleep with your grandfather at night, and the child refused to leave. The young woman said, I can go without you. Grandpa said in a positive tone: educate children to be honest. You can't fool children and old people at the same time.

In the past, the teacher handed out papers, and the girls at the back took one more and shouted "Teacher, I have it, I have it". As a result, the boy sitting next to me said, "It's mine, it's mine", and the whole class was shocked ~ ~ ~

The mouse went to the toilet. When he saw the bear, he was too scared to speak. The bear looked at the mouse and said, can't you shed your hair? The mouse trembled and said nothing. The bear asked again, won't it lose its hair? The mouse said, don't drop it! The bear grabbed the mouse and wiped his ass and left.

There is an auto parts factory that has been in disrepair for a long time; Piece: the word has been completed; An old man in Niu Yi took a cow and said; Cars and cattle factories are equipped with cattle, and at worst there must be tractors! "

A person is always farting in the office, and colleagues can't help but say, can you be quiet? Then I saw him sitting.

The man kept shaking and asked, Why? Answer: I tuned it to vibrate.

Once in an English class, there was a sound of starting a motorcycle outside. The sound lasted for a long time.

After a long time, noisy people are unstable. At this time, the teacher found everyone upset and shook his head and said, "China.

Our motorcycle. Alas! "The class was over, and we discovered that it was the workers who were logging!

A couple was caught by a savage in the mountains and said that they would let you go if they ate each other's shit. They did it. On the way, the woman cried and the man asked her why. The woman said sadly, you don't love me, otherwise you wouldn't pull so much!

A woman was walking at night when she suddenly saw a man coming towards her with open arms and gave her a hug. The man fell to the ground crying and said, it's the third piece. Who did I piss off? Is it so difficult to take a piece of glass home?

The dog said to the bear, marry me. Marry me, and you will be happy. The bear said, I won't marry you. Marrying you will only give birth to a bear. I will marry a cat and have a panda. How noble!

The wife went home suddenly behind her husband's back. The adulterer jumped out of the window to escape and mingled with the morning runners. Some curious people asked why they didn't wear clothes, and replied: streaking, never seen it?

Curiosity: I have seen streaking, but I have never seen streaking with a condom.

12 farmers drive donkeys into the city and meet hooligans, hooligans: Have you eaten? The farmer said, yes. Rogue: I asked the donkey. Hearing this, the farmer turned and slapped the donkey twice: Shit, there are relatives in the city who don't say a word.

I saw a MM in 13 Internet cafe, wow! Is a beautiful girl!

After a long hesitation, I finally got up the courage to go to her and whispered, can I talk to you?

MM actually cried loudly: no! I won't sleep with you!

The whole internet cafe is staring at us. Embarrassed, I blushed and went back to my seat without saying anything.

After a while, the MM came up to me and whispered, I'm sorry ... I just wanted to test people's reactions in extremely embarrassing situations. I shouted: What? You want three hundred dollars? It's too expensive!

/kloc-9 out of 10 households in 0/4 residential area have installed security doors, but only one household does not. One day, nine families were stolen together, and only the one who didn't break into the house escaped. The thief wrote on his door: "Don't worry about me, I will worry about you!" "

15 On the bus, the old lady was afraid to ask questions every time she stopped. After the bus arrived at a station, she kept stabbing the driver with an umbrella: "Is this the convention center?" Driver: "No, it's ribs!" "