Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Contains scary and funny jokes

Contains scary and funny jokes

Are you looking forward to seeing funny and meaningful jokes every day? In fact, in daily conversations in life, we can often use these funny jokes to lighten the atmosphere. Next is the "Horror and Funny Jokes" I carefully prepared for you, welcome to watch!

"Horror and Funny Jokes (Popular)"

1. “Dear friend, when you use a pair of inconspicuous sanitary chopsticks, the entire forest is being cut down and turned into a desert; when you use a small plastic bag, maybe the world will become a white garbage. country". Here comes the joke

2. "Socks decided to leave the pants he had been in love with for many years and switch to shoes. The pants cried and asked: "What's so good about shoes?" Socks replied: "You hang around all day long. "It's better to be in harmony with the shoes than to be as down-to-earth as shoes."

3. Sincerity is not wisdom, but it sometimes emits a more attractive light than wisdom. Sincerity is a This kind of openness of the soul is a kind of crystal clear nobility!

4. Only when you have love in your heart can you be loved. Love is the source of power to create miracles! Even if there is no return, it can warm and purify. Our souls!

5. Happiness is not because we have more, but because we care less. More is a burden, a kind of loss, less is not a deficiency, but another kind of surplus; giving up is not necessarily a problem. It's a loss, but a broader possession!

6. Don't wait for opportunities, but create opportunities. A few more minutes of preparation last night will save a few hours of trouble today. Hard work leads to success.

7. Candles flickered all around and the sky was dark. I sat in front of you and told in a low voice: Late at night, there was a person walking in a dead alley with lights on both sides. Under the dim street light, his shadow grew and grew. A person walked towards him and passed by him. As he walked, his scalp exploded - there was no shadow of the person just now! The pace of life today is too fast, so many people like to listen to jokes, especially horror jokes. So, let's be mentally prepared. At the end of each story, you may be suddenly pushed from behind, making you weightless. It felt like bungee jumping...

8. That night, as usual, I slept alone in the editorial office and did a short session. Dream. For many years, I have always dreamed of flowers and green grass, and I have never had a nightmare. However, this day I broke the routine. I dreamed that a stranger invited me to be a guest on QQ. I didn’t know whether the person was a man or a woman, his age, ugly appearance, good or bad character, so I went there in a daze. The place seemed very far away. When I arrived at my destination, it was already dark. Inside the house, I could only see a barren mountain with all kinds of weird and dry plants growing there, and the ground was full of dark holes.

9. My neighbor Axiang had a boyfriend when she was twenty years old. Later, she secretly ate the forbidden fruit and became pregnant. As she was not old enough to get married, she went to the hospital to have the child aborted. At the age of twenty-two, Axiang married her boyfriend, but she had been unable to conceive for three years. When I was pregnant, I went to many big hospitals, and the doctors said everything was normal. Just when the couple was discouraged, Axiang miraculously became pregnant. When they went to the hospital for a checkup, the doctor said she was already three months pregnant. The couple was very happy when they looked at their belly that was slowly getting bigger. One morning, Axiang woke up and felt her belly as usual. She found that her belly was flat. Just when she was terrified, she suddenly heard, "Mom, I'm afraid of you." Knocked me out again, so I sneaked out. " Said a baby boy who was not yet fully formed lying under the bed.

10. Bai Xiaobai's boss often molested her, sometimes in public situations and sometimes in the office. Bai Xiaobai She couldn't bear the boss's indecent treatment, so she told her boyfriend.

She originally thought that her boyfriend would beat her after hearing this, but after her boyfriend smoked a few cigarettes in silence, he said: Kill him. The jokes are here

Contains scary and funny jokes (selected articles)

1. Xiaobei's face is full of sadness, he was fired by his boss today.

2. Xiaonan is his twin brother, but he is happy, although he also let his boss fire him.

3. Of these two brothers, one has a crying face and the other has a smiling face. After so many years, Xiaobei feels a little uncomfortable. One night, Xiaonan came back and told Xiaobei what he had seen today. He smiled and Xiaobei cried. More and more people like Xiaonan, while Xiaobei gradually becomes unpopular. He was very angry, so at night, he killed Xiao Nan, peeled off his face, looked at his face, looked at Xiao Nan's body, and said: "It's not different, it's the same as mine." After that, Just tear off his face.

4. In order to train Su Chen to be a wise king, Ye Zhen taught them their homework every night. After a month, Su Yu understood her hard work and took the job into his own hands. Three months later, Ye Zhen went to check the learning results of five-year-old Su Chen: "What has your father taught you recently?" "Raising tigers." Leave Huang to be raised by me, so that Xiao Huang and I won't have time to bother him or you. ""&..."

5. Snow White escaped from the palace and asked for directions: Excuse me. How to find seven little people. Good Samaritans showed her the way. So she went to the forest and saw a small cabin with seven small beds arranged in it. Snow White lay down and fell asleep. In the evening, the seven dwarfs came back, and Snow White said: "You must be the seven dwarfs in my destiny." The seven people looked at each other, and then said: "You are in the wrong place, we are gourd babies."

6. She is a model, not famous. He is a famous French photographer. He took photos for her and became famous. Later, she worked with many rich people. Every time she was injured, she would always go to him, who was like a father. Seeking comfort. Later, he died of cancer and gave the studio to her. She discovered his secret in the darkroom and the photo hanging on the string above her head was also hers.

7. They were a pair of high school students who fell in love. Later, the girl passed the exam and the boy went to study abroad. They broke up without mentioning their major. Finally, she chose to be a stewardess on the plane. He met again. He said: "Why did you become a stewardess?" She said: "I am waiting for someone, and I hope that the first person he meets when he returns to China is me. "

8. Lou Xiyue said to Xiao Xu: "Actually, if you think about it, I am a pretty good master." Tang Xu said coldly: "Oh? Really?" Lou Xiyue: " Yes, you see, I don’t charge you for tuition fees, tuition and miscellaneous fees, or nap care fees. I don’t charge you. I don’t charge you. I don’t charge you. It is 18 years of compulsory educationamp;... Many girls in the company are fascinated by him. During the New Year's Eve party, the girls all want him to come, but anyone who calls his phone gets a busy signal. Everyone asked her to try it, and she got through. He had already fallen asleep, but he was still willing to come. After he arrived, everyone asked why the phone couldn't be connected. He said that of course he had to set up an interception while sleeping. Everyone pointed at her, and he raised his eyebrows: "Except her, I answer her calls whenever she calls."

10. Xiao Ruirui is the best English learner in the class and is always curious about knowledge. The very strong child asked him how to say XX in English. For example: "Xirui, what do you say kitty cat?" "cat!" "Puppy dog?" "dog!!" "Where's the joy?" Xiao Ruirui thought for a long time, then hesitated and said to the squad leader: "Mea~~"