Tell jokes, short sentences, funny jokes.

1: My advantages are: handsome; But my shortcoming is that I am not handsome.

I won't go to work until the sun comes out; If I come out, I'll go back to sleep!

3: Snails run wildly.

4: I read the Forbes Rich List every morning when I get up. If my name is not on it, I will go to work.

5. Talking about money doesn't hurt feelings, but talking about feelings hurts money the most.

6: I curse you for buying instant noodles all your life without seasoning packets.

7: Although you wear cologne, I can still vaguely smell the scum.

8. The house is rotten and the future is uncertain.

9. The most mysterious department in history: related departments.

10: Undeniably, mosaic is the biggest obstacle to the progress of human nude art in this century!

1 1: There are only two things I can't do in my life: this can't be done and that can't be done.

12: People have backgrounds, and I have backgrounds.

13: White Horse … Where did you die! Did you lose your prince and dare not come to see me?

14: I am an angel, and I can't go back to heaven because of my weight.

15: There are too many liars and obviously not enough fools.

16: I smiled at the sky from the horizontal knife, and then I went to sleep.

17: Your mobile phone is cheaper than the phone bill.

18: It's a long way, but this is Xiu Yuan. Let's take a taxi.

19: My life has two sides, A and B, and yours has two sides, S and B. ..

20: I am not afraid of stealing tools, but I am afraid of stealing children to understand technology!

2 1: Failure is not terrible, but success is the key.

22: If you have time to learn Feng Shui and occupy a good tomb after your death, you can make up for the regret that you can't afford a good house before your death.

23: Ming Sao is easy to hide and hard to prevent.

24: When the day turns into night in bed again, the sun is born …

25: successful people are all-on the way to Niu B, they have an erection all the way.

26: Women remember: Be sure to eat well, play well, sleep well and drink well. Once exhausted, other women spend our money, live in our rooms, sleep with our husbands, pick up our boyfriends and beat our babies.

27: I remember one day shortly after graduation, my girlfriend sent me a short message: "Let's break up!"

Before I could feel sad, my girlfriend sent another message: "Sorry, I sent it wrong."

You can be completely sad now.

28: I know I'm not a handsome guy, but someone saw my full moon photo and said my left nostril was idolized.

29: Being single is very painful. Being single for a long time is more painful. I saw a sow the other day, and everyone thought it had good eyes. ...

30: To deal with a vicious person, you must be more vicious than him; Dealing with a despicable person is more despicable than him;

3 1: When dealing with handsome people, you must be more handsome than him; To deal with a handsome man, you must ... ruin his face!

32: Menstrual blood is the uterus crying for loneliness, and wet dream is the seminal vesicle crying for depression. Menstruation once a month, but wet dream is uncertain, which just shows that men don't flick when they have tears. ...

33: What? Navy SEALs? ... is it ... as good as our urban management?

34: Without lover's flavor, how can there be human touch?

35: The kid next door finally vowed to lose weight-at the graduation job fair, someone said to him, "Sorry, buddy, you blocked my cell phone signal."

I allow you to come into my world, but I will never allow you to walk around in my world.

37: Reluctant to let the children catch wolves, reluctant to let the daughter-in-law catch hooligans, reluctant to update the collection. ...

38: You think I am a three-year-old child. I am only two and a half years old!