Jokes and cold jokes can also be used, the more the better.

An ant saw an elephant coming towards it, so he buried himself in the sand, leaving only one leg outside. The swallow saw it and asked, "Hey, ant, what are you doing?" "Hush, be quiet. I want to die. " The ant replied. The next day, the swallow saw a group of ants waiting in line and asked, "What are you going to do?" The leading ant replied, "Yesterday, the elephant tripped and was seriously injured. Let's donate blood to him together. " After a while, the swallow saw the ants patting the back of the team and asked, "How did you finish pumping blood so quickly?" The leading ant replied, "Only one ant has the same blood type as the elephant, so we are all back, so let's smoke his." On the third day, the sparrow saw an elephant hiding behind a piece of grass, stretched out a leg and asked, "Elephant, what are you doing?" Shh, don't let the ants hear you. He tripped my brother the day before yesterday, and I tripped him once today. On the fourth day, the sparrow saw a group of ants waiting in line and asked, "What are you going to do? The leading ant said, "Yesterday, the elephant hid in the grass and tried to trip me, so I broke its leg." Now I want to carry him to the hospital. " More than 60 years ago, a friend told me a joke and made me laugh. Later, I was admitted to the hospital because of a stomachache. Before the doctor operated on me, he asked me why I smiled like this, so I told him. He laughed hysterically and finally died laughing. I was taken to court. The judge asked me to tell a joke, and the jury decided whether it met the factual elements of manslaughter. I want to sign an exemption contract. The judge announced that the court would be adjourned and reopened a day later, and announced that he would accept my opinion. So, I told this joke in court, and as a result, some people knocked on the table with a smile and some people rolled on the ground with a smile. Later, everyone who heard the joke that day died laughing. I became a celebrity in an instant, and reporters from all walks of life asked to interview me. I know that telling this joke may constitute public infringement, so I vaguely said something to the camera to the effect that "the reason is always a lie, and the belief is always masturbation." After the program was broadcast, it caused great repercussions. Unexpectedly, one day, some mysterious plain clothes broke into my bedroom and dragged me into a dark room. After a long time, a strong light shone on my face. I barely opened my eyes and was shocked. The man sitting in front of me is the only person as famous as me-the president. The president roughly explained the purpose of arresting me, which was simple: record this joke and send it to the dictator of a hostile country in the Middle East, laughing him to death. I had to agree to his request, and at the same time put forward that this joke belongs to weapons of mass destruction and should not be aimed at civilians. The president agreed. Two weeks later, the president announced that he had mastered the key technology of the joke and successfully tested it in the desert area. This caused an uproar in the international community, and many countries panicked. International military scientists named it "Laughing Deterrence". At this moment, some eastern country suddenly announced that it had mastered this joke, and the buddy who told me this joke had taken refuge in that country. Thus, a "balance between laughter and deterrence" has been formed between us. Three years later, on April 1 day, what I was worried about all day finally happened: a terrorist organization in the Middle East stole the original technology of that joke. As a result, civilization has been destroyed as never before, and governments all over the world are in constant fear. The United Nations had to hold a global summit and finally designated April 1 day as April Fool's Day. More than 60 years have passed, and I am dying. Before leaving this world, as a witness of history, I feel it necessary to tell this joke to everyone. That day, the joke my friend told me was very simple and short, just one sentence: I went to the ladies' room three times and didn't get in! ! 4. After vomiting blood, in the third year of high school, a beautiful woman sat in front of me, and I didn't know where I got those incomprehensible things every day. One night, when I was studying by myself, she smiled cunningly and said to me, "I'll tell you a riddle." If you can guess, let me do anything, but I don't think you can either, hehe … "Looking at that contemptuous smile on her face, I said," Well, come on, there is no mystery in the world that I can't! ! "So she said," The palm of your hand is big and furry, with a dark hole in the middle. What do you say? " When I finished, I snickered at me ... I was stupid at that time and didn't know how to say it, but when I turned my head, I smiled at her, gave her a wink and said, "I also have a riddle with a similar answer to yours." You can guess that if you don't take precautions-it's nine inches long and hard, and we are very close ... "She blushed and didn't want to. ! The head teacher asked me how she treated me, so I told her about her guessing with me. Hearing this, the head teacher was furious! He said, "Look at you. You are still like this in senior three. Don't you want to go to college? You two look at your fans, what a mess, and write a review together tomorrow! ! "The girl was even more wronged and said," My mystery is not a mess! ! ! "Head teacher:" Oh, what do you say? " "It's cow ears! ! "The class teacher was surprised for a long time and said angrily to me:" Look at you, people's fans are all cattle ears. Tell me what your fans are? " "My fans are horns ..." The class teacher vomited blood. ...

Hope to adopt