Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Please be warm and sweet, spoil Xiaowen's stomach, black men and white women, thank you.

Please be warm and sweet, spoil Xiaowen's stomach, black men and white women, thank you.

Hi, my man.

One is a rookie who has never been in love once, and the other is a sinister gigolo who is obsessed with love history. Where did they end up? I told Qin Ke that you should be nice to me, or I would have an affair. Qin Ke said quietly, you are not beautiful, your mind is not smart, your body is not diligent, and your grain is not divided. You will lose the chain at the critical moment. Are you sure there's anyone over there after you get out of the wall? I see, yes. He smiled and said, I like you, but others don't smell like me, so you have to listen to me, you know? I focused on his first clause and nodded happily. It took me a while to realize that the original intention and result of my negotiation with him had run counter to each other.

Then, love goes with the flow.

Everything in the world is divided by Chen-what he wants and what he doesn't want. He plundered the former and destroyed the latter. He thought An Xiaoli belonged to the former, but when she was angry, she seemed to be the latter. Then suddenly one day, Chen found that An Xiaoli was not in the world he thought. At the top of the mountain that night, there was the most beautiful moonlight in the world. Li Weiran is about ten feet away from Qin Sang, smiling softly. "Don't say you don't like me. Sang Sang, why can't I see that you like me? "

Fall in the morning light

Little red riding hood fell into the hands of a wolf, so you can imagine this story-this is a story of little red riding hood constantly resisting and a wolf constantly oppressing. The following is the protagonist's summary of this article: Little Red Riding Hood: This is the struggle history of an innocent girl. Wolf: This is the pursuit history of an infatuated youth. As for the truth-only the reader knows it.

(Good writing, good writing)

Unscrupulous master

He tore off his clothes to reveal his chest muscles, and her nosebleed flowed happily.

He closed his clothes, and her nosebleed shrank back with a whoosh.

Between nosebleeds, everything seems to have changed. ...

Many benefits of being a master:

(1), regardless of the apprentice's life and death, you can linger in the wine-it doesn't matter if the apprentice is dead, you can take it back.

(2), you can regard it as a breeze, and then grab its credit and ruin its reputation-disciples generally don't live long.

(3) You can pick up girls and apprentices at the same time-no one dares to marry in the future, so be prepared.

……

Therefore, the golden bell jar, the iron cloth shirt, the six-million-dollar armor and Liu Xiahui's ability to sit on the ground and keep things in order are essential life-saving courses for apprentices.

Immortal life of unscrupulous Brewmaster vs cannon fodder little white girl

Let‘s cross the bridge when we come to it.

There is also Gu Man's "Love O2O" and "Come to eat Shanshan", and there is humorous story with the same effect.

The youngest woman, the darkest man, the most wonderful story, the most touching love and the most happy ending.

This article is a timid woman who is afraid of heaven, ghosts and death. In a word, she is afraid of everything. She met a man with a black belly, a black heart, a black face and a black hand, which led to a tangled story of chasing after me, hiding from you, being strong and weak.

Ye canoe (timid): Uncle, uncle, big brother, you are my paradise and my land. As long as you let me live, I pray every day that you are as happy as the East China Sea and live longer than Nanshan. ...

Luo Qiao (sneer): Do you really think so?

Ye canoe (holding up three fingers): I am willing to swear to heaven!

Luo Qiao (chuckle): I remember you said I was your God.

Then swear to me.

Tell daxiong I love her.

Miss Xiong and Mr. Xiaojing, we are both young and happy.

Five years later, meet again.

On the one hand, she attended the wedding with him.

On the second side, she said, "I want to live with you."

He said: "I don't live with people, I only marry people!" " "

When the witch meets the great god

When witches in wild at heart meet evil and insidious God.

"Marry me and I'll sell you the fox." See how the great god proposes.

"Do you get my permission to touch my wife?" See how the great god saved the beautiful woman.

"Woman, you must be mine." See how the great god confesses.

Black-bellied God's wife-chasing plan-

Let's see how a generation of witches were subdued. ...

Love O2O.

The latest work of Gu Man, the author of Why Shengxiao Mo, whose love O2O touched millions of readers. If you are "miserable" and suddenly a very strong and arrogant man proposes to you, what is your reaction? What is it that men fall in love with women at first sight? Appearance? Temperament? Is it worth it? No, the campus prince+Xiao Nai, a high-level gamer, has seen a little. What she loves is not her aggressive color, but her delicate hands dancing on the keyboard and her leisurely momentum! ! ! Awkward, huh? Bei Weiwei, who is also a master of online games, was in front of the computer at that moment, methodically directing the gang war, and fought a perfect brilliant battle of defeating the strong with the weak, completely unaware that the angel of love was by his side ... Then, Shawna, the top student of basketball and swimming and the chief planner of the game company, began to hunt for beauty online and offline ... So, a love quietly sprouted in a flower's time.

Why Shengxiao Mo?

A love in youth leads to a lifelong entanglement. When I was in college, the sun was shining, and I fell in love with the great talents in the law department at first sight. She was cheerful and straightforward, and finally let him stop for her. However, his inexpressible words finally made her run away from home with a sad heart. Seven years later, when Zhao Mosheng returned to China, I first saw him in a crowded supermarket. He is still handsome and outstanding ... this book begins with an encounter in the supermarket seven years later and tells an unforgettable love story. The hero, He, is affectionate and persistent. Under the calm appearance, there is a deep yearning, and the deepest tenderness is hidden in the cold language. If she had appeared in this world, everyone else would have made do with it, but he wouldn't ... as he himself said, "If this wait has an end, what's the difference between seven years and seven minutes?" Written to turtle man (text/Ming Xiaoxi) "I once saw a reader leave a message under her article saying that warmth is not enough because it is more penetrating than warmth;" Enthusiasm is not enough, and enthusiasm is more important than enthusiasm; Romance is not enough, it is so real. That kind of deep-rooted acacia with a little overbearing gentleness, pretending to be indifferent, and the thoughtfulness revealed in indifference, such a man is the most beautiful love in my dream. So I firmly squatted in the pit. "

Shanshan came to eat.

Shanshan squatted in front of the delivery room as a temporary blood bank, and was ordered by the big boss to have a blood test, which proved that she was healthy and her blood was qualified. When giving birth, the pregnant woman is really in critical condition. Shanshan took 300 CC of blood, and the pregnant woman turned the corner. Shanshan walked out of the hospital with obvious gratitude, walked for a while, stopped, looked at the moon and sighed. "Capitalists really suck blood, but they have no humanity." Shan Youzi shook her head and didn't notice a black sports car parked behind her. After hearing her sigh, the man in the back seat of the sports car moved his mouth and closed the newly opened window. "Go home." "Boss, didn't you just say that you would send Miss Xue back?" "No need." The man said with a straight face, "Capitalists are inhuman."

Flower crab walks with jiaozi.

In every woman's life, there is always a man as a guide to guide her outlook on life, world, values and love. As a fake LOLI girl in jiaozi, I met a black-bellied corn whose main purpose was meticulous guidance and the last purpose was captive breeding.

So, what kind of drinking and washing process will it be?

Bottom line: This is a story about a simple and ignorant fake LOLI dumpling shop girl who was cheated by her appearance because she was inexperienced, and was finally taken away by a black crab corn.

Let's have dinner, little glory.

No, CJ, start

"I want to check in.

"Please register first."

……

"Do your brother and sister live in the same room?"

"... yes. "

……

"13 14 room."

"I don't want this room. Is there a room for 14 14? "

……

"that room 1399?"

"No, what about room 13 13?"

……

"Sorry, except these rooms, there is only one room 10 10."

"... just this one. "

Premarital marriage

About the first time we met, when I shouted that love at first sight was a mistake in life, my husband looked at me for a long time and said, "For example,

If you can get rid of the bad habit of eating after gargling, your teeth will turn white. "

Is this a cold joke? Why I don't think it's funny at all.

Ahem, get to the point, show off for a long time, the focus of the story is me and my handsome husband, before marriage, knot.

After marriage.

(Well, highly recommended)

So what if you are my student?

/kloc-Zhao Shuiguang, 0/8 years old, met Tan Shumo, 27 years old. He said, "So what if I'm nine years older than you? What's wrong with that? I share all the happiness with you, and I taste all the pain in front of you. " So the best man attacked step by step and stayed together from high school to college. She said: "Meeting him in Tan Shumo was the greatest blessing in her life, and it won't happen again." Girls grow up all the way, producing flowers that exude people. It was because Zhao Shuiguang, who was eighteen, met Tan Shumo, who was twenty-seven years old. He didn't meet the right person at the right time sooner or later. Who can say that this is not a great happiness? What are you doing when you are eighteen? Are you sad because of your first love? Are you hesitant about your future? If you have a pair of firm hands to give you strength and a person to give you warmth and care for you without reservation, will the future be different from now on? This is a teacher-student relationship, but it has nothing to do with it. No matter what age or state people are in, they all have a yearning for beautiful love and a longing for a happy life, regardless of age. This is just a story that deserves your smile.

Elite lover

Tang Chenrui Keywords: investment bank director, laying a good foundation, playing tricks.

Xi Xiangwan Keywords: prosecutor, man show, love brother.

Hug a person for too long, and then hug others, the hand will still unconsciously ring into the previous shape.

It was not until the end that he realized that emotion is the most inappropriate venture capital. Once tempted, there is nothing left.

She didn't know what a good lover he was until the end.

To put it simply, it tells the story of a prosecutor in a man show who is emotionally passive and aggressive, attracted by an elite, and then goes back to his nest to eat his story.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, eat, eat. ...

Poor students in Peking University

If we have to summarize this novel in the traditional way of summarizing the central idea in junior high school and senior high school, that is:

The purpose of this article is to tell the story of a poor student who passed the college entrance examination and was admitted to Peking University.

Encourage all college entrance examination students, college students and graduates to find their confidence and dreams.

To put it bluntly, it is an express suggestion that everyone has such a psychology:

People with such brains can also be admitted to Peking University and find love.

So people like us,

I went to Harvard and Oxford at random,

Peach blossoms bloom countless times, and peach trees bear countless fruits!

Marry a vampire

(Don't look at the copy, it's boring, just push it. )

What is warm in winter and cool in summer?

New copy: You smiled slightly and didn't say anything to me, but I feel that I have been waiting for this for a long time.

My neighbor is very dark.

The title sums up everything, with more than 10 thousand words, telling the story of a woman meeting a black man.

Ps this book is very small, such as-

"This boy is really good-looking, clean in vain, with clear Xiu Xiu, red lips and white teeth-the whole is the kind of prince I was obsessed with in high school" and so on.

For example, this book is a little yellow-

He raised his eyebrows and said with a smile, "32A? I lost money. "

I bent my eyes, put my hand under his abdomen and shook it gently-

"2 cm in diameter? I lost money. "

Then the author of ps has three incorrect views, low personality and loves money. Caution, then caution.

Ten years.

The mistake is not that you have a crush on a handsome guy, but that you want to confuse someone.

The mistake is not that you want to get a handsome man, but that you get one but find the wrong person.

The mistake is not that you want to hook up with a handsome man or the wrong person, but that she doesn't know another innocent handsome man yet.

It's not like she doesn't know how to hit on someone else by mistake. But when we meet again ten years later, she still doesn't repent.

Yu, an unmarried poor old woman, accidentally hooked up with an innocent handsome man when she was 18 years old.

Ten years later, the handsome boy thought, it's my turn to hit on you this time, little round face, go to hell.

Xian Jia Xiao Xi fu

You have to learn the fairy roster in class, take the gossip test in the exam, lay a foundation every day, and fly a sword in everything, even if you are admitted to the biggest and best sect to fix the truth? After 180 years of hard work, it was not only a loud noise in the sky, but also a thunderous trip to Du Jie. Whether it is successful or not, people will never see each other again!

How to fix it? !

When green light burns, beauty is Zen. Can the Bodhisattva solve his worries, not become immortal, save money to marry, and be willing to be one and never leave the white head?

I think this book is very good, very good, very good. Unfortunately, it's not finished yet.

Rabbits like to eat grass near their nests.

She has always been a very rational, emotional and intellectual person, so she doesn't want the great dream to end in this man who doesn't know office games. Doesn't he know that there is a saying that rabbits don't eat grass beside their nests? Originally, he was a very strict person in choosing a lifelong partner. Since he recruited Sue, an interesting woman, his curiosity has been aroused inexplicably. Anyway, he is also a handsome boy. She worships another man in front of him and keeps preaching her poisonous love theory in the office. The most unbearable thing is that she always inadvertently provokes his man's self-esteem. Hum, he will eat this grass by the nest!