Selected Putonghua Jokes

1, the fish seller shouted at the top of his lungs: fish, fish. Not to be outdone, a jujube seller nearby immediately shouted: shit (jujube), shit (jujube). Fish. Shit. Fish. Shit. The more fish sellers listen, the more wrong they are. He felt that the jujube seller was deliberately targeting him, so they quarreled.

The director of a township enterprise will visit Kobe, Japan. He doesn't even speak Mandarin, but only speaks dialects at ordinary times. So he asked his subordinates to find translators, and they came back to report that none of the Japanese translators could understand the factory director's dialect. The factory director said: this is easy to handle. We will bring another teacher from our town to translate our dialect into Mandarin first. The subordinate said: Not yet. When you arrive in Japan, you have to ask someone to translate Japanese Mandarin into Kobe dialect.

A foreigner with a strong dialect got lost in this city. When he saw a gentle young lady coming, he greeted him and asked, Rabbit (comrade), kiss (excuse me) ... Before the words were finished, the young lady blushed with anger.

4. A southerner came to a snack bar in Beijing and said to the waitress, How much is it to sleep for one night (a bowl of jiaozi)? Hearing this, the waiter's face changed greatly, swearing, hooligans, southerners said, only 60 cents, cheap, one night (bowl).

5. A farmer brother and sister used a scooter to pull wheat to the market to sell. A southerner came to their brothers and sisters and asked, Brother, how much is your little sister (wheat)? Big brother was so angry that the veins stood out on his forehead.

6, Niu Laobo is shouting: selling moon cakes, four dollars for ten. Many people gathered around to buy this cheap moon cake, and only when they paid did they know that the moon cake for the elderly was four yuan for ten yuan.

The old people in the nursing home held a party on the night of Mid-Autumn Festival. The host, Mrs. Wang, said: Ladies and gentlemen, the performance is really damn (start). Be quiet,please.