Humorous jokes of men and women

Humorous jokes about men and women

Love is when you feel that you can die for him when you don't quarrel, and when you quarrel, you feel that the person who deserves the most death is him. After the quarrel, you feel like God! If he dies, I won't live. Welcome to enjoy the humorous jokes of men and women! Humorous jokes about men and women (1)

1. Why is it illegal to cheat money and not to cheat feelings? Because feelings are worthless.

　2、? What do you talk about when you pursue girls?

　? Are you there? Why? Have you eaten? Oh, my heart aches, drink hot water! Put on more clothes, hurry back, it's cold outside! You are busy, sweet dreams, go to bed early! ?

3. Three-character Classic for Women: More parties, less homes. Go out, a flower. Stay at home, mom. Don't be depressed and don't digest.

find girlfriends and praise each other. Beauty and gossip. Go shopping and spend your money. Drink less and drink more tea. Sleep more, money is wasted.

don't wait, your ears are dazzled, no matter how good your clothes are, your waist will become shrimp. No matter how good the meal is, there are no teeth. No matter how much money you have, lie down in bed. No matter how strong you are, you feel bad. No matter how good people are, tofu dregs.

4. Men are born hunters. Tens of thousands of years ago, they held their breath in the jungle. When a wild animal suddenly jumped over, they threw a spear at it.

this gene has been passed on to today, so that they still pay attention instinctively? Shake? Things, and regard it as prey, possessive.

This is why women's earrings, long hair, ponytails, skirts and big breasts are so fascinating to men.

5. Don't try to reason with women. A creature that bleeds for seven days a month and doesn't die is a fate on this planet? Science has proved that women's imagination is second only to Van Gogh when they are intuitive, their IQ is second only to Einstein when they catch rape, their writing style is second only to Mo Yan when they are lovelorn, their fighting power is second only to Altman when they are angry, and their danger is second only to Tibetan mastiff when they are crazy!

Male compatriots, give up resistance. Women can't provoke this creature. Compromise is the only way out!

6. For friends with insomnia, try blinking: after turning off the lights, keep your eyes on the ceiling and blink repeatedly until your eyelids are tired, and then sleep peacefully.

Because the upper eyelid is dominated by the sleep center in the cerebral cortex, the eyes are naturally sore.

So, if someone winks at you again, don't think it's making eyes at you. He or she is probably treating insomnia, and you are at most a ceiling. Humorous jokes about men and women (2)

1. Looking for a boyfriend, it is best to find someone with a girlfriend. Because: 1. He won't be gay. Your opponent is only one person. 3. What others are reluctant to throw away should not be much worse to use. He has accumulated some skills.

2. When your girlfriend calls your full name through your mobile phone, remember, don't worry about anything, run, run quickly and never look back.

3, a pair of lovers quarrel, the man quarrels with reason, and the woman quarrels with love. In the end, men think women are unreasonable, and women think men don't love themselves. That's why don't reason with women.

4. It seems that straight men really can't understand nail polish. In their eyes, so many colorful and beautiful colors are simply divided into four categories: just killing people, just pulling out feces, being too poisoned and getting onychomycosis.

5, female classmate, chatted and said that she still didn't find a man to marry at the age of 3. She said that she wanted to find a handsome one, but she was afraid of being unreliable. I said that you should find an unattractive one, and she said that she was afraid of being unreliable. . .

6. What's it like to be chased by someone you don't like? It seems that you are hungry and wait for takeout, only to find that you have delivered the wrong meal.

It is steaming in the lunch box. Looking at you, you are thinking about other dishes.

I had to smile apologetically: Sorry, I'm not hungry. ?

7. M: Do you know what the saddest thing is as a girl?

female: are you out of your mind?

m: no, my stomach is shaking worse than my chest when I run. Humorous jokes about men and women (3)

1. I can't always get a girlfriend. Am I asking too much?

　? Silly! Other people's demands are too high. ?

　2、? How important is appearance?

　? Three points are doomed, seven points depend on hard work, and the remaining 9 points all depend on looks. ?

　3、? How to improve your girlfriend's IQ?

　? When she doesn't like you, her IQ naturally rises. ?

　4、? Why does my boyfriend always feel that other boys are trying to me?

　? Men know men too well! ?

　5、? What do men hate most about what women wear?

　? Clothes. ?

　6、? What's it like to be with someone who has no feelings?

　? The feeling of going to work! ?

　7、? How to answer a girl's question? Why are you so kind to me

? Because I'm your spare tire. ?

　8、? What should I do if I can't find a topic for girls to chat with?

　? Just say:? I feel a little embarrassed, so let's kiss to ease the atmosphere. ?

　9、? What's the difference between your predecessor and your current one?

the gender is different! ;