Those decoration experiences comparable to "Duan Zi" actually cured me.

The designers are busy working out the design scheme.

Engineers are busy with the project.

Sales partners are busy running business and signing bills.

Is it a little behind the rhythm?

In order to ease everyone's busy state

Specially collected a bunch of "brainstorming" decoration connotation paragraphs.

3 15 Don't look for small things.

When decorating, I made a shoe cabinet at the door. Who knows that after the carpenter made the shoe cabinet, he only brushed the varnish outside, but not the inside. Isn't this laziness?

I reminded him to paint the inside with varnish, and he plausibly said, "There is really no need to paint the inside with varnish! It is best to keep the essence of wood and not corrode shoes! "

After hearing what he said, I am also very confused as a layman. At this moment, I remembered that Sister Li's house in room 15 on the third floor was making a wardrobe. Why not consult? I said to the carpenter, "I always thought that varnish should be painted inside, so I'll go to 3 15 for consultation!" " "

I turned my head and was about to go to Sister Li's house on the third floor 15. The carpenter grabbed me and said, "No! Don't! Can't I brush it for you? Such a trivial matter, what are you doing in the Consumer Protection Association! "

Turn down the sound insulation effect.

When our house was decorated, in order to ensure the quality, my mother took the initiative to stare at the work every day, and during the decoration process, she stressed to the decoration team countless times: "The materials must be of high standard."

On that day, carpenters needed soundproof cotton. As soon as the supervisor expressed her intention to decorate, she resolutely refused: "cotton?" No, absolutely not! Give me down! "

Why is there a gun?

The nail gun I bought for the carpenter that day was found broken when it was useless, and I was going to get one from the hardware store. The carpenter was afraid that I wouldn't choose, so he accompanied me to buy it.

Downstairs, I stopped a taxi. I sat in the front and the carpenter sat in the back. On the way, I complained, what kind of broken gun is this? Even if it's useless, it's broken It won't delay things. The carpenter said, "it's all your fault for not buying or picking!" " I have bought more than a dozen guns in recent years, and none of them is broken! In our line of work, you can't pick a gun? "

As soon as the words were finished, the driver came to an emergency stop. He parked his car on the side of the road and said to us in a trembling voice, "What do you two do?" How can you have a gun! "

Don't take it seriously in the model room.

Miss Zhao was very satisfied with the "model house" of a decoration company, so she handed over her new house to the company for decoration. As a result, she found that the decoration quality was not as good as she thought, and it was far from the "model room", so she went to the company to negotiate.

The person in charge of the company is very disdainful to her: "The model room is for you to see, not for you to live in!" " King Lao Tzu can't move this model room to his home! "Miss zhao was speechless.

It's called ping.

Because the construction team who decorated the house was too irresponsible, my boyfriend had an argument with them, so I went over to stop the fight.

Boyfriend: Right, stand up straight against the wall-look, this is called Ping! How dare the bricks on your wall be called flat? ! !

Construction team: ...

"Hanging" top

Mr. Hao's new house was decorated by guerrillas. He didn't spend too much money or worry too much, but the quality was too poor.

The bulge in the floor tile and the crack in the wall are no big deal. Unexpectedly, one night, there was a crunchy sound in the living room. The young couple walked over trembling and gasped-it turned out that the ceiling had fallen.

So I was angry and called to ask questions. "Guerrillas" replied: "The ceiling is suspended, how can it not fall?"

Where can I put the TV?

One day, when discussing the design scheme with the owner, the hostess insisted on buying a big TV to put in the living room, knowing that her living room was not big.

The man touched his glasses and said softly to the woman, "Dear, shall we put the TV on the balcony or the sofa on the balcony?"

Discount decoration

As soon as the advertisement of a company's discount decoration was launched in the media, many people flocked to sign renovation contract.

A few months later, customers complained constantly by phone, mostly involving decoration quality problems, and the customer service department was tired of coping with it and reported it to the company boss.

The boss is poised: "Tell them not to yell, the discount decoration is like this!" " "

Decorative design style

Owner: Excuse me, Master, what style does your design belong to?

Master: Modern new concepts subvert traditional metaphors and abstract pragmatism.

Owner: What are the colorful things on this wall?

Master: Don't think that's a wall. Don't you see that's Picasso's masterpiece? Picasso, do you know?

Owner: Of course. But isn't the iron fence in the bedroom a bit redundant? Besides, it seems unnecessary to install a security door in the bedroom!

Master: Marriage is a prison of love. You should believe in it. As for the security door, it is considered to increase the safety factor of your marriage with your husband.

Owner: Here. ...

This hole is more round.

When the house is renovated, the renovation team will show me the list. I was surprised to see the air conditioner punching, and said, "When my mother decorated the old house, the air conditioner punching was not so expensive. You have to have 20 yuan for this expensive price. "

Captain: It's expensive for a reason!

Me: Then tell me.

He thought for a moment: We dug a more round hole.

Environmental protection putty

An owner came to a building materials store to buy putty. The shopkeeper asked, "What does nanotechnology mean on this package?" The clerk pondered a little and replied solemnly: this nanometer means environmental protection! Rice is edible, so nanotechnology is absolutely environmentally friendly! The shopkeeper wondered: can this putty be eaten as a meal?

Alarm security window

When the decoration was accepted, the customer found that the sliding door of plastic-steel window was very laborious and made a harsh "creaking" sound, which was very chaotic.

The decoration master solemnly explained: "This is the most advanced anti-theft decoration technology at present. It has two functions: one is to give an alarm automatically, and the other is to remind the owner to pay attention to theft every day. "

Renovation progress

Owner: "Your renovation progress is really too slow! It's been 60 days, and I haven't finished it yet! You know, it only took God six days to create the world! "

Decoration worker: "but you should take a closer look at what the world is like now!" In this case, you will know that hurry is no good! ! "

There is no charge for nails.

I am a designer. Once I went to buy blockboard. When the workers came out and found nails, I took the board and went to the building materials boss. The corners of the mouth of the building materials boss became warped: "What are you yelling at? The nail confiscated your money again! " "

Cold, I'm still an old customer.

Send air conditioning

In order to expand the business, a decoration worker advertised that he would send an air-conditioning cabinet when the decoration was over 80 thousand. An owner asked him to decorate a new house at a cost of 65,438+10,000 yuan. When finished, he will get air conditioning through advertising. The decorator asked: What about the air conditioner you bought? I'll call a porter to deliver it for you!

Bedroom decoration

"How can I fall asleep faster?"

"Decorate the bedroom into a classroom!"

Every short story is funny to others, and only those who have experienced it know that the dumb can't tell the bitterness of eating Rhizoma Coptidis. Only owners and friends who have been fooled by small companies can understand what cannot be laughed at. Therefore, use these jokes to guide everyone. When choosing a decoration company, don't blindly pursue cheapness, and the engineering quality and after-sales service should be taken into account.