Ask the master to treat jokes.

1. The young man asked the Zen master, "Master, I ..." "There are some things I can't let go of some people, right?" The young man exclaimed, "How does the master know?" "Come on, come on," said the Zen master, pulling the young man away. "I've cooked all the hot water, and you idiots will be miserable if you don't get scalded."

2. The young man asked the Zen master, "Faye Wong, Li and Zhou Xun are all single and their stars are dazzling. Why can't we be together? " The Zen master took out a dish of sesame, a dish of peanuts, a dish of melon seeds, a dish of walnuts and a dish of almonds for the young people to taste, and asked him, "Is it delicious?" The youth nodded his head. The Zen master took out a five-kernel moon cake for the young people to taste, and the young people suddenly realized after vomiting.

3. The young man asked the Zen master, "Master, chicken soup geometry, can you laugh at life?" The Zen master suddenly slapped the young man on the ground and handed him a cold medicine. After eating, the young man suddenly realized, "Master, you mean that my cultivation of chicken soup is still very weak. Should I use chicken soup to improve myself at any time in my life? " The Zen master shook his head and said, "You have taken the wrong medicine."

4. The young man asked the Zen master, "I am often bullied and can't stand straight." The old Zen master smiled and took out a snake. The young man realized, "You want me to be as flexible as a snake, right?" The old Zen master smiled and replied, "Whoever bullies you, just put this thing under his bed ..."

The young man asked the Zen master, "I broke up with my girlfriend who had been together for 7 years." Does love not exist? " The Zen master smiled and took the young man to the court where he was playing. "You'll see." The young man thought for a long time and said thoughtfully, "What the master means is that the meaning of love is like a game. As long as the process is hard, it doesn't matter what the outcome is?" The master closed his eyes and said, "No! I mean, it's none of my business if you break up? "

6. The young man asked the Zen master, "I am desperate for life because my wife has taken all the money." The Zen master took out an axe and cut off the table. The young man said thoughtfully, "Did the Zen master ask me to break my immediate fear?" The Zen master said, "You still want to talk to me when you have no money! Believe it or not, I will kill you! "

7. The young man asked the Zen master, "Master, what do you think is patriotism?" The Zen master sat on the futon and turned a deaf ear. I haven't seen a response for a long time. On reflection, the young man seemed to suddenly realize, "Master means that although you are an ordinary person, even if you have the love to die for your country and are full of blood to kill the enemy, you should keep it deep in your heart and don't need to show it?" The Zen master instantly threw the futon under his seat, glared at him and cursed, "If you can't afford the high fragrance of 6,000 yuan, don't disturb the old lady's lunch break here!" Get out! "

8. The young man asked the Zen master, "How can I end being single?" The Zen master pointed to the opposite mountain, and the young man said thoughtfully, "Does the Zen master mean that there is another master on the opposite mountain who can answer me?" The Zen master said, "I don't want to be a fucking Zen master." Are you still asking me? There are still vacancies on the opposite mountain, so you should be a Zen master as soon as possible. "

9. The young man asked the Zen master, "Master, I have been under a lot of pressure recently. How can I relieve stress? " The Zen master took out his mobile phone and said with a smile, "Young man, let's play a game to relax. Have you ever played rhythm master? " The young man hesitated for a while, thinking it was National Day, and suddenly realized that he had hit the Zen master!

10, the young man asked the Zen master, "Everyone says I'm ugly. Am I really ugly? " The Zen master picked up a glass of water and poured it on the young man's head. The young man is puzzled: "You mean, I am not so ugly when I wash my hair every day?" The Zen master replied: "Ugliness is even uglier at the end, and it is even uglier to raise a glass to pour ugliness."

1 1. The young man asked the Zen master, "Master, I am rich now, but I am not happy at all. Can you tell me what to do? " The Zen master asked, "What is wealth?" The young man replied: "There are 8 digits in the bank card and 3 suites in Wudaokou. Isn't it rich? " The Zen master didn't speak, but held out his right hand. The young man suddenly realized, "Did Zen master let me know how to be grateful and repay kindness?" "No, local tyrants ... can you ... be friends?"

12, the young woman asked the Zen master, "Why am I young and beautiful, but no man likes me?" The Zen master asked, "Do you know why men prefer the sea to the lake?" The young woman thought for a moment and replied excitedly, "I see, because the sea is a big challenge, and men like challenges, so they like the sea, right?" Zen master: "challenge my ass because the sea is big!" " "

13, the young man asked the Zen master: "I have never been able to catch up with the girl I like. What should I do? " The Zen master opened his eyes and pointed to the snail struggling to crawl on the trunk next to him. The young man suddenly realized, "Zen master, do you mean that as long as you persevere like this snail, you will always succeed?" The Zen master swung the wooden fish and slammed it: "Silly X, you have to have a decent house like it first!" " "

14. The young man asked the Zen master, "Some of my friends are divorced. What if you don't believe in love? " The Zen master smiled and pointed to a wooden hammer in front of him and said to the young man, "You'll see." The young man pondered for a long time and said thoughtfully, "What the master means is that the meaning of love, like this wooden hammer, seems insignificant, and as long as you persist, it will be strong?" The master closed his eyes and said, "No! I mean, divorce is none of your business. "