A joke heard on the bus.

Joke: A teacher with a strong accent dictated the contents of "Sleeping in Spring" to the students as follows:

Wochun

When dark plum smells flowers, it hurts and hates low when lying on branches. When it smells the shore like water, it is easy to reach spring green.

The shore is green, the shore is green and the shore is dark green.

After listening, a student wrote:

I was stupid.

I have no education and my IQ is very low. Ask me who I am, donkey.

I am a donkey, I am a donkey, I am a stupid donkey.

Moreover, if you ask someone to help you read the original book "Sleeping in Spring", it will be even funnier for you to watch "I am stupid" (with that person).

The thief found ten pieces of information in the stolen wallet.

1, feel glad:

Sorry, brother, my money is in another wallet, and this one is specially used to fool you.

2, low, medium and four types:

Dear thief brother, this is a little respect for your family. I don't know if you are enough. You can spend it, but if it's not enough, I'll burn it for you when I get to Tomb-Sweeping Day.

3. Romantic and affectionate:

Buddha said that looking back 500 times in my last life brought me a passer-by in this life. Today, in the vast sea of people, you put your gentle little hand in my pocket ... I really want to say to you, "fate!" " If God gives me another chance, I really want to say three words to you, "Give it back". You add another deadline, and I'll scold you for life!

4. Formal "Request for Instructions on Returning Funds"

My financial situation is not good this year, the cash flow of wallet operation has been in deficit, the profit has been greatly reduced compared with the same period of last year, the debt ratio remains high, and there is no hope of turning losses into losses. In order to survive and develop steadily, and to appease laid-off workers, we urgently need the support of preferential policies, so we apply for the return of some paid funds. No, please instruct!

5, jingle type:

This time, your boy made a profit and I lost it, and the money will definitely be spent by you, but you won't want to have another time, because God is going to give you a thunder, and you don't want to be a thief again in your next life!

6, tear-jerking ambition is much bigger:

The villain originally lived on the edge of Suzhou. He has a house and a field at home, and his life is full of joy. He hates this little sneaky thing. He was arrogant and heartless, and he became a gang that stole my money. In order to get his money back, he had to sell himself as a slave, earn money diligently, read articles and call names to show his fame and fortune, and his enemy's heart was made up! Since then, the thief's fingerprints have been with me, and I remember this sadness.

7. Bargaining type:

The password of the credit card is not easy to decipher. Please give me back my ID card, because it is too difficult to reissue it. I can tell you the password with multiple-choice questions.

8. Fly with me:

Honey, you steal slowly. Be careful that JC grabs your hand. Honey, you should slip away quickly, or you'll break your head in labor.

9, caring type:

It's really hard for you. You are desperate to forget your work. It is difficult to decipher the credit card password. Please take care when you smash the ATM.

10, enthusiastic:

It's very kind of you to put your hand into my pocket in your busy schedule. I'm flattered. I think about it day after day, and I hope you will come again next time. I'm going to cut off your hand and give it to future generations.

Riddle; One who fails to reach the Great Wall is not a hero.

Civil and military officials are holding banners.

Can write, can fight, can go to the sea bear.

Qi Shangwen doesn't eat fast.

There is a talent before noon. -Flag

One plus one minus one back and forth, it is estimated that no one answered the answer is potato, because+and _ together are soil, the word below is _ and the mouth is above the word bean. Remove the bottom before, and see if it's true.

The scholar raised his pole,

Ridiculous and useless! -bear