Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Prophet adonis ① Market
Prophet adonis ① Market
(2) Memories of soda
a rose with thorns
(4) The Eastern Expedition Army
(5) Election
(6) Plague
(7) the birth of a tyrant
(8) Losers
(9) City of Fear
(10) Nirvana
In the middle of the grassland, perhaps in the middle, there is an extremely simple felt bag. Frame wood is the worst wood. As long as it can hold up, even if it looks shaky, the owner doesn't want to fix it better.
At one time, the grass on this grassland grew very tall and stuck together, and there were piles of blankets wrapped together.
All this has changed since a westerner came here from the west. At first, it was a natural change. There was no wind blowing here, but it began to blow frequently. The wind will erase the basket in the sky, and all the places you can see will be twisted into black, which will suppress all the plants here. Before long, the grass was buried in this place, and it became more and more depressed.
How many things have been left in this grassland? The child hid his parents in it, making anxious parents cry profusely, and his voice spread far away without responding. When parents are afraid, children will come out and run to their parents.
Couples will whisper here at night, and some will smile at each other tacitly and get into the grass.
Herdsmen who have been busy all day will lie here sporadically, sipping the brewed wine and telling interesting stories and yellow jokes they met one day. Even businessmen in the past liked to stay here at night and rest in a small house in the east, where a girl named Tiny lived.
Tiny is an orphan, but she has a good personality and a good relationship with the residents here. She runs the only hotel here. People used to stay for one night when they saw the moonlit night here as quiet as a tiny place and the moon, and the sparkling eyes of the lake.
There are two legends about Tiny. One is an orphan with no real meaning. Her father is from West Asia and her mother is from the Caucasus in the north. Two people who have no intersection at all met here, fell in love quickly, lived together, gave birth to Tiny not long ago, and then left in the direction of the future. However, it seems that there are always people who like to package mediocre stories into romantic love stories. It is impossible to verify whether it is as legendary.
Another thing that can be verified is that when Tiny was eighteen, a soldier who had left the Crusaders came here. When he found this place, he had not eaten or drunk for a long time. Tiny took him in, and soon the soldiers refused to move eastward.
Since then, Tiny has transformed the house into a hotel, accepting people coming and going.
Now there is only yellow grass here, and people who live here have moved out of here one after another and settled down in less than ten minutes.
In fact, everyone wants to get as far away from here as possible, but this westerner really scares everyone. His name is adonis, and he is a gloomy man. He always looks at you with his eyes and makes you uncomfortable.
Most importantly, he is the only prophet here, and his predictions are too accurate.
There used to be a lovely wizard who could turn a small stone into gold. There are no cliffs in this place, and some fragmentary stones are just right for wizards. Every once in a while, he will give some good gold to the people here, which is very popular with people. After a long time, young people took gold and went to the southern city to start a business. Many of them made a fortune and sent many new things to their families.
No one likes this gloomy prophet now. He predicted that there would be meteorites at night and heavy rain in the middle of the night. If all these are coincidences, then adonis's most powerful prediction is about life and death. He said whoever dies tonight will die in the middle of the night.
Besides, he used it to blackmail people here. If they don't leave here, he will say that everyone here will die suddenly tonight, and everyone will compromise, so they will continue to live there, and every new felt bag will be put tighter.
Only Tiny and Toya didn't move out. Tiny still believes that people in the past will stay here. Interestingly, adonis has not shown any malice towards Tiny, and Toya, who is too old, is 3 12 years old. It's too much trouble to move out of here again
(1) market
When I first moved out, some residents were not used to it. Some young people will stay with 35% to 35% people and angrily withdraw from the places where they once lived. However, as soon as they approached the big felt bag, some cold and timid people turned their heads and ran back. If they are more courageous, they will suddenly rush back trembling and finally be left behind. If they pass Toya's door again, they will run farther and farther.
So people began to seriously plan a new life here. In the past, a family with a good family may live in a two-story building made of fine wood, but now the scenery is nothing. There is no good wood nearby, so they can only find some pine trees to build new houses bit by bit, while the poor are still thinking about how to build a simple place that can shelter from the wind and rain. Although simple, it is also difficult for some poor people. If you are young and middle-aged, hardworking people will get up at dawn every day, take an axe and a self-defense crossbow, and go to the forest to cut down trees to make the foundation of the house. Because no one has lived in the forest for a long time, there are often many wild animals that have disappeared for a long time, but it should be just rumors. Many wild animals have been circulating before, but all kinds of wild animals have ruled here, and sometimes it is strange and scary. For ordinary people, this place is full of danger
But for poor young people, this is nothing. If you don't come here and try to cut down some trees, you will still be homeless. If you are lucky, sometimes you will collect some precious medicinal materials and bring them to the market. You can sell them at a good price and buy some property. And if you are unlucky, you will be attacked by wild animals. Think about it, if there is only one black bear, it will be enough for people to digest. And Kenda, a young man, once met a group of black bears. First, he took out a crossbow and aimed at the left eye of a mighty black bear. Suddenly, he pulled open the bow, and the arrow feather flew over several bushes and nailed it to the left eye of the black bear.
The black bear gave a miserable cry, which angered the nearby black bear. All the black bears seem to have been summoned and poured out from all directions. As soon as Kenda took out his axe and cut one, he was knocked down by a stout bear's paw. Taking advantage of the gap, Kenda climbed his calf to the ground and trotted out of the forest, looking embarrassed.
Since then, Kenda has never been to the forest, preferring to be a tramp. When asked by his brother Kenya, he also replied, "It is still important to save your life." Kenya was very helpless to him.
It didn't take long for this place to evolve into a small town. A small building for the rich has been built. Most of them have two floors, and some have three floors. From the outside, the pillars, doors and windows made of good wood are shiny. Of course, if you walk in, you will find that under the glamorous appearance, the interior of the house is still very simple, because many furniture is still in transit, and sometimes it will be delayed for a few days due to weather factors. The village chief Ike's house was built in the nearest place to the former grassland. It was a humble cabin, which was found by young people and built by the village chief. Every morning, the sun just shines here and only throws a little heat. Before the moon disappeared at the other end, the village chief had got up and stared at the grassland. Once full of vitality, now the vegetation is sad.
Unfortunately, Kenda's brother Kenya has been seriously building his own room recently. He is lucky, at least better than his unlucky brother. Every time he goes into the forest, no wild animals appear. Of course, surprisingly, Kenya has seen black bears and brown bears several times, but he has not been attacked at all. Instead of cutting down the growing trees, Kenya found old trees and took them back as furniture materials. This room is made of stone.
When the room was about to be built, his unlucky brother came to see him again.
"Dear brother, although your house doesn't look as glamorous as those nobles, it's enough to shelter from the wind and rain. Dear brother, let me live with you, so that we can work together as brothers, and a bigger house will appear soon. "
Although this damn lie can't convince Kenda, out of morality and the friendship we played together as children, Kenda was cheated. Kenda was clever and eccentric when he was a child, but he listened to his brother. Now, without any cleverness, he can come up with some clever tricks every day.
When more and more people settled here, the market appeared again. Until then, everyone is looking after their own affairs.
Now more and more things need to be traded with each other, some are directly exchanged with each other, and some are directly purchased with gold pricing. Fortunately, no one knows how to touch gold now, so these are the attributes accumulated before.
Of course, there are not only things to sell in the market, but also artists who perform some simple acrobatics, such as swallowing fire. The burning torch is burning with restless flame, and the performer eats it directly and puts out the fire. This is often applauded, but few people throw gold under him. There is an urgent need to build a house and set up furniture. They have no extra money and are unwilling to take it out.
People who play the piano here earn even less, and there are not many onlookers, but pianists also play by themselves, and children will stay here curiously for a while.
People come and go in the market, and Jianda is also wandering. He only drank all night last night, and now he can't walk steadily. People passing by him will avoid when they smell alcohol. After a while, he lay prone on the ground. In addition, Santos is looking for an opponent.
Santos has a terrible face and a scar under his ear, which was left by a fight. Now in the market, he has issued a reward order: he will give one or two gold to anyone who knocks him down within three rounds, but if he is not defeated after more than three rounds, he will pay one or two gold. This makes many young and strong people eager to try.
Santos's slogan is also very tempting: "You have three chances to beat me, and you can get one or two gold coins if you grasp it once. This is one or two pieces of gold. You can buy the wine you want to drink, the furniture you want to buy, save it a few times, and you can marry the girl you want! "
Those who want to try are ready, "I'll try."
The crowd made way for the brave young man to walk in quietly. Santos looked at the young man in his early twenties. His height and muscle development are equal to his own. He is not a simple opponent. Of course, for the sake of momentum, Santos still had to show a fearless attitude.
"Well, fool, come on, start at once. Knock me down in three rounds and I'll give you one or two gold. "
The young man squared up, shouted, crouched down and rushed to Santos. When he approached Santos, his left fist slammed into Santos' face, but unfortunately, Santos seemed to be ready for all this and flicked to the right. The young man missed the target, overexerted himself and fell to the ground. The crowd burst into laughter and admiration. It's amazing that Santos is so strong but so smart. When young people realize the strength of their opponents, they become more cautious. Instead of rushing to attack, they wanted to take some circuitous measures, but all this was too easy to see through. And when giving up the active attack, Santos began a large-scale attack after finding out his details. All this is no longer a reckless action. Santos swaggered and punched the young man on the nose. Santos gave the young people a good kick when they were still absent-minded. And this is just two rounds, Santos strode forward, stepped on the young man, ostentatiously asked:
"There will be another round. Do you want to continue? "
However, the young man did not slow down or respond immediately, which angered Santos. He felt it was disrespectful to him and stepped on it even harder.
"Idiot, come on, come and kill me, get up, idiot, one or two gold! Hurry up! Idiot "
The young man realized that it was his own behavior that annoyed Santos, so he tried his best. This effort should have been aimed at attacking opponents, but now it is used to beg for mercy.
"I, I'll give it to you, gold."
The young man found a piece or two of gold from him, threw it to Santos, stood up and went out, and the crowd made way for him. Just now it was for his courage, and now it is to sympathize with his embarrassment.
"Who, who else, come on, come on, for one or two gold!"
But obviously, no one wants to try again, and everyone is waiting to see if there will be another brave man. Of course, everyone is expecting someone to come out and teach Santos a lesson, but he is definitely not fighting alone.
At this time, an interesting scene appeared. Kenda, who had just drunk and slept on the ground, woke up at this time. Of course, the wine is definitely not awake. It was thirst that woke him up. He tried to find some water to drink, but he heard "one or two gold"
One or two gold, yes, one or two gold can be exchanged for many good wines in the sky, not only wine, but also the company of beautiful women. Every time I go to a pub, I can only drink, but because of lack of money, I can only turn a blind eye to those beautiful women. If I had this gold or two, I don't know what happened here, but Jianda doesn't know where he got the courage. He stood up and announced to the world, "I want this gold or two."
The crowd responded with a brief silence, and then burst into laughter, laughing at his overreaching, which made Kenda very angry. Why do people always laugh at poor people like him? He took a small step forward and was knocked down by Santos, just like he was knocked down by the bear's paw before.
No, no, no, this power is a big bear. That must have been an illusion. Why are there people in the forest? It's impossible. It seems that I am too sensitive. Wait, bear, bear knocked me down, don't run. Of course, just thinking is useless, because this time is different from last time. Last time, I had the strength to start, but this time I completely collapsed here. Maybe this is a stronger black bear. Looks like we're going to be judged by fate. We wait here for the arrival of the next palm. Come on, come on, Kenda is still meditating.
But the palm never came.
His brother Kenya appeared, and Kenya suddenly jumped up and punched Santos with the second punch that was about to slip out. Obviously, this sudden attack made Santos unprepared. He fell to the other side and became more angry. But suddenly, the businessman's nature calmed him down, and he quickly put out his anger and smiled. That's a terrible smile. Looking at Kenya, it is obviously telling the world: "All right, young man, Mr. Kenya!" "
Kenda heard one or two gold coins, which were his brother. His own brother got the gold, and there was light in his eyes. He couldn't wait to get these rewards, but he was immediately scolded: "Come back with me."
"We can't take the money. I just came to see my brother." Kenya turned to leave, and the crowd gave way as usual.
Kenya slowly moved her body and accidentally met Roche who was playing by herself. Loche is blind, but he is also an excellent viola player. He has been playing by himself, saying a word of thanks from time to time, and nothing else. People always give his feet some change. Of course, some people who have the ability to appreciate music will enjoy it here and give themselves a reward. Sometimes,
After being touched, Roche was playing a slow and brisk chapter, but suddenly a change began. The music became passionate and fast, and then it went back and forth with a simple long sound.
"The blind man has a clear mind, but his eyes can't see his heart." Locke just whispered.
In the afternoon, there were fewer performances in the market, all kinds of dazzling foods were put out, the aroma was fragrant, and pubs were opened. All kinds of beer and wine were bought by buyers to treat themselves for a day's work.
Santos walks into a concubine exchange where three women are sold every day. If the family is poor and has just moved here, the family without any property can only make a living. This is because if it is sold, the exchange will divide a sum of money and give the rest to the woman's family. As soon as he entered the yard, he glanced at the three women tied to the post, and his eyes were attracted by the middle one. This may be a Central Asian girl with a high nose and skin equivalent to fresh milk. When she saw Santos looking at her, she was a little scared and short of breath, which made her chest tremble slightly and made her more attractive, but Santos understood this as that she liked herself very much, which was a kind of shyness.
"I want her," Santos raised his voice.
"Hundred taels of gold, this is the first-class stuff. You have a good eye." The shopkeeper is unworthy.
"give"
"Hey, it's also a rare generous person!"
When the shopkeeper saw him pay directly, his attitude was not so cold. After all, many people just moved here from the grassland and have no money to buy slaves or find concubines, but today's rich people take the initiative to pay.
"Her name is Soda La, and her father went to war with the Eastern Expedition Army, but there was no news. My mother sent her here and bought herself a house with some money. " The owner introduced.
"Well, take a bottle of good wine, I want to have a drink, damn it, I was teased today."
Night is really a good carnival time, and it is also the world of young people. When the old people rest in their houses, some young people drink in bars, while others light bonfires near the grasslands. The fire illuminates everyone's face, and every night is similar. First, everyone is joking together, but often after a while, a sad mood will spread. The grassland that once grew up is close at hand, but it is so strange. In the past, even at night, there were all kinds of noises and winds floating around. Now, it's dark and lifeless.
When everyone is silent, someone will always break the silence. Finally, these young people will appear in pubs and replace silence with revelry.
Tiny's not.
Tiny is often silent from the beginning, and nothing can make her feel any fluctuation. Finally, the crowd dispersed one by one, leaving only her, but she would stare at the grassland, stay for a while, and then go back to the grassland, the lifeless grassland, only her, adonis and Toya.
Soda was dragged home by Santos, yes, because Soda's resistance is a fair deal in itself. Soda's mother traded Soda's body for her stable residence, but Soda didn't explain how. In the past, if women didn't want to, they were often sent here by their families and began to resist. She died as soon as she entered the door, crying, but if her family made up their minds, they wouldn't do anything again.
"Don't lie, you still want to raise prices like this, haha, have some wine, let's tell the truth."
But soda is completely different. When he was sent by his mother, he looked blank, perhaps thinking that he could let his mother live a comfortable life and sacrifice fearlessly. He was fearless when he took off his clothes and remained fearless when he was tied up. But now that she has a buyer, she doesn't need to be tied up here. She will fight fiercely.
"Even if it's just an exhibit here, I won't go with you, asshole. I don't want you to insult my reputation. "
"Ah, you also have a reputation, who knows you? Come on, let's walk out the door. If you weren't naked, who would look at you more? Oh, naked people are even more shameful. "
"Bastard, big bastard"
"Bastard is bastard, beauty. I lost face today and want to compensate you. "
So Santos stopped nagging and went straight over, slapped tiny in the mouth and slapped her again. Of course, tiny couldn't stand the force and fainted.
Santos grabbed Tiny's hand and dragged it out, dragging one hand directly to the door. The dust on the ground sucked Tiny's body, feet and face. This scene is relished by residents coming and going. Yes, Santos is a big jerk, there is no doubt about it, but everyone is still surprised by this rude behavior.
Of course, there are some young people who haven't built their own houses yet. When they see this, they will be jealous. Of course, they will be jealous. I don't have any residence yet, but you can enjoy a woman's body.
Santos didn't think much. He just wanted to bring Tenito home early, so he didn't show much except to keep his pride and strut forward. Passing by Luo, I found Roche still playing a piece of music, a sad song in A minor. Santos shouted, "hey, idiot, what's on?" Now everyone goes to the bar to have fun. Stop it, idiot. "
"Ignorance is a sin," Roche whispered.
Finally, Tony was dragged into the house by Santos, who picked up Tiny with his powerful big hand and slammed it on the bed.
Tini was covered in injuries, which further aroused Santos' desire. Tiny's clothes on her chest have been ground to pieces, revealing high nipples and emitting fragrance. Santos didn't think about anything, just took a bite.
"ah! Bastard, let me go, bastard. "
This seems to remind us of something. Santos stopped the activities of the upper body and quickly took off his pants, revealing ugly and stout organs. Just like Santos, ugly and disgusting. But after the stimulation of small voice and gentle body, it became stout, like an old tree, with many branches and vines intertwined.
Santos became impatient, and even more impatient, as if waiting for the order to charge. This order was of course given by Santos. Santos pulled out Tini's clothes and cleared all obstacles with brute force. It also rushed in directly, took the lead in entering this battlefield, and became more and more passionate.
"Ah, clean and jerk, clean and jerk, shout clean and jerk" The tiny voice decayed with its more and more violent attack. Whenever Tiny makes some resistance, such as digging Santos with her nails, she gets more violent attacks and endless slaps. When Tiny didn't move, it naturally leaked out.
"Kenya, my Kenya"
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