How does it feel to live abroad for a long time? Do you feel like you belong?

Answer this question for a friend who took his daughter to Holland in early March. In March, China's epidemic situation gradually decreased and became the safest place in the world, while foreign epidemics began to break out.

Her husband is Dutch. He returned to the Netherlands in June 5438+February last year to start a business, and was in urgent need of her help, because the epidemic dragged on until March. So I still have a sense of belonging, otherwise I can't get through the worst time in Europe.

She said that she didn't feel any difference before, except that she couldn't order takeout at any time, and the payment was still cash. From wearing a mask to facing the epidemic, she saw a completely different side and was very insecure.

It's good to watch the epidemic in China with masks. They haven't been bored at home for two months, but they are leaving for the Netherlands. When Europe is serious, they don't wear masks and have no heart for epidemic prevention. Everyone thinks that the autoimmune system can bear the blind confidence of the past.

My friend is a caterer, and when he went out to distribute leaflets, he was teased by children on the roadside. Her husband said that customers would not want to buy their takeout when they saw him wearing a mask. Wearing a mask was too stressful.

First I'm afraid of being teased … now I'm afraid of being accused! Their idea is that healthy people should not wear masks, but should donate them to medical staff.

At present, the Netherlands has stopped many tourist attractions and closed many museums, concert halls, cafes and entertainment places. In the streets where people used to come and go, the Dutch who marched easily were forced to stay at home and wait quietly for the epidemic to pass. My friend said, I just want to be healthy this year.

It seems that living in your own country is really different from living abroad. At least now, you can start to return to work gradually, drive out, and be healthy and secure.

Hello, my son has lived overseas for a long time. I often communicate with him. Because he is an English major. So he went to Africa after graduating from college. Working as a translator in Africa. He worked in Africa for a year and a half. After he came back from Africa, he went to Iran for three years and worked as an interpreter. After three years in Iran, his life is ok. I also learned the local language and got familiar with the local culture. Later, he felt that his cultural level was somewhat insufficient. So I went to Korea at my own expense. Korean students have lived for a year and a half. These experiences gave him a comprehensive exercise. Let his independent living ability be improved.

First, the pace of life.

Through observation and communication, I found that living abroad, if it takes a long time, is actually difficult to adapt to domestic life for a while. I remember his first holiday from Africa. When communicating with us, the rhythm doesn't match us. Many times we can only say that he listens, and often he can't respond to what we say. Because the pace of domestic development is too fast. Many countries and even developed countries can't keep up with the development of China. Therefore, many people living overseas, especially those from the third least developed countries, can't keep up with the pace of life at home. So it's hard to get used to going back to China, even if you stay abroad for too long, you can't go back to China.

Second, eating habits.

Because he basically eats at home when he is at home. After going abroad, you may not adapt to foreign eating habits. When he was in Africa, most of what he ate was something called miso. I grab food with my hands. During his holiday in China, I found that he lost a lot of weight. However, he also taught himself to cook when he was abroad. Sometimes we will teach him how to make jiaozi and how to cook Chinese food online. Improve your life from time to time. Otherwise, if you don't eat well, you will be particularly homesick.

Third, a sense of belonging.

Take my son's life in Korea as an example. He said that when he was in Korea, he spent most of his time with China people in Korea. Little contact with local people. Most overseas Chinese are like this. It may also be due to livelihood or some other reasons to live overseas. Even if you live for many years, you will not have a strong sense of belonging. My son said that Koreans in Korea. Although South Korea and China are both a nation, their sense of belonging is not strong. Many times, Koreans get together. Because different countries have different cultures, backgrounds and histories. China people are particularly patriotic abroad. This sense of patriotism is particularly strong after going abroad. Once there are some inappropriate remarks against China abroad, China people, especially overseas Chinese, will react strongly. This kind of overseas childlike innocence has a particularly strong feeling abroad.

I hope many of them are preparing to go abroad, whether traveling or living. Everything will be smooth and safe. thank you

Without the feeling of home, can you have a sense of belonging? Vagrancy, homelessness and wandering outside are not in line with the nature of modern people.

Hello, I am an immigrant from Canada. I'm glad to answer your questions from my point of view through video. Thank you. I hope you like it.

Being abroad for a long time, just like a tree without roots, just like duckweed floating on the water, its own thoughts and concepts will be out of touch with China. It's difficult to go abroad, so you have to start a business from scratch when you return to China for development. Overseas that can't be integrated, China that can't go back. I'm struggling. Even if I start all over again, I still hope to return to China and never live such an erratic life again.

Hello, although I have never lived overseas, personally, I think there are many factors whether you have a sense of belonging. If you have a career and a family overseas and your family is very happy, I think you will have a sense of belonging, but you will also miss your motherland and hometown at some point, just like Xu Zhimo's Homesickness.

This is the same mentality as brothers who work far away from home. He has a successful career and a harmonious family, so he has a sense of belonging there. It is his second hometown.

Brother, whether you are overseas or anywhere, your mentality is also very important. Make yourself happy, and your sense of belonging will increase with your achievements. There is an old saying: come and be safe. be careful/cautious

Living in New Zealand for a long time, let me answer my personal thoughts.

The sense of belonging varies with everyone's mentality.

1, I have a sense of belonging in New Zealand: I am with my beloved, my career is here, I have bought my own house and got my own home through hard work. Because I am a local resident, I enjoy all medical benefits. Because my family background is not very warm, I don't have to be my brother's helper in China, and my life is very happy.

2. when there is no sense of belonging: there are few friends here, and everyone meets by chance, and the friendship is not deep. It's not easy to make good friends in your thirties.

Especially when arguing with people of other nationalities to maintain national unity, I feel powerless. One-to-many relationship is really difficult ... Now, during the outbreak in COVID-19, we wore masks overseas to attract their abuse, because they wore masks because they were sick, and we wore masks to protect ourselves. Whether it is cultural conflict or discrimination, we really want to return to China at this time.

I think the parents of the generation of immigrants with children are the most touched. Many children in China can't speak Chinese, but their parents' English is not good ... and their children are westernized at school, and their families are a cultural war between China and the West.

So you can't have it both ways.

There will be a feeling of second hometown, because I am too familiar with the local society, culture, language, environment and so on, and I don't have a feeling of being abroad. But there is no 100% sense of belonging. The reason is simple, because you will always be a foreigner in the eyes of local people anyway.

I belong to a person with strong adaptability. Middle schools began to live on campus, and universities and graduate students were in other provinces. It takes more than 20 hours by train. After graduation, I went to Shenzhen alone, and later went to Guangzhou and worked for six years. Later, she got married and moved to Turkey, where she has lived for two years.

Two years is not a long time. When you face a strange world, a strange language, a strange religion, different living habits and different food tastes ... you are unlikely to have a strong sense of belonging for the time being. You can only get used to life here and accept many things completely different from before.

I remember that during the epidemic, there was a paragraph circulating in the circle of friends: "Have you stayed at home recently ... can you only communicate with your friends on your mobile phone?" Want to invite your friends out for dinner? Can't make an appointment and have nowhere to go? Supermarket procurement has become one of the few opportunities for fresh air? I didn't see many people in the street. No public transportation? You won't order takeout? Express delivery becomes slow delivery, and I don't know when it will arrive. Congratulations, you finally realize the daily life of most overseas Chinese! " This is not a joke, it is really a portrayal of my daily life.

Two years later, I have basically adapted to the life here, but there are still two problems that are still a little tricky at present.

One is breakfast. Turks are used to eating breakfast at home, almost all of which are raw and cold food. Looking at a big table, it can be roughly divided into several categories: all kinds of jam, all kinds of cheese, all kinds of olives, plus butter, bread, eggs, and then cut cucumbers and tomatoes. If there is any hot food, it is probably black tea. At that time, you will miss China's hearty breakfast very much: fried noodles, rice rolls, rice noodles, preserved egg porridge, tea eggs, soybean milk fried dough sticks, glutinous rice chicken, quicksand bags, bamboo tube noodles ... all of which are steaming and fragrant, and my mouth is watering.

The other is to stop by. Turks like to visit each other and chat with each other. The host will prepare black tea and dessert, and sometimes invite guests to enjoy dinner. He will visit the house for at least half a day. It is disrespectful to leave in a hurry. This is a sign of their hospitality and intimacy. But this is different from our living habits in China, especially in the big cities of China. Our interpersonal relationship is very simple and we seldom visit each other. For us, home is a relatively private place and will not be easily disturbed. There are default social places for friends, colleagues and relatives to meet, such as cafes, restaurants, bars, parks, shopping malls, KTV and so on. So I'm not used to the Turkish people's warm visiting habits, not to mention I don't understand their language, so it's hard to avoid being a little embarrassed to sit there. After the outbreak of the epidemic, the Turkish government called on everyone to stay at home honestly, and I was very quiet during this time.

There is no perfect place in the world, we can only adapt to the environment. No matter where you are, you should be positive and optimistic, live seriously and live brilliantly. No matter where you go, no matter what the weather is like, please always bring your own sunshine.

Attached is a map of homemade breakfast.