? Social Network: A Different Psychological Satisfaction

Recently, "China Youth Daily" reported that a survey showed that teenagers became "otaku" by relying too much on online social interaction in summer. 68% students have social activities through QQ, Weibo and websites during the summer vacation, and spend more than 6 hours online every day. There are even 15% students who have been indoors since the summer vacation and have been "soaking" on the Internet.

However, it's not just children who are addicted! According to the survey, 44% of netizens spend more than 8 hours online every day on average, nearly half of netizens are keen on social networking sites, and 50% of netizens will feel restless after leaving the network for two days. Another survey shows that only 25.7% netizens never use mobile phones to surf the Internet.

When "speechless" becomes a normal life, what will it bring? Degeneration of language function, alienation of interpersonal relationship or self-isolation? Anything is possible. The key is how you choose.

What?

What has social networking changed?

From "See you at night" to "See you online"-Social function degradation

Before the popularity of the Internet, the traditional social way was based on face-to-face communication. After work, I get together with friends in the evening, and everyone laughs and laughs. This is the most relaxing time of the day. However, when the Internet came into people's lives, the night that should have been a carnival for friends became quiet. Face-to-face chat becomes online chat, and door-to-door visit becomes information or email greeting. Even if I work in the same office, I am only one step away, and I am used to online communication:

"Do you have any materials for tomorrow's meeting?"

"yes."

"Send me a Q."

Tap the keyboard, slide the screen of the mobile phone, and with a gentle touch, the seemingly simple action completes the socialization, but I don't know that the situation of "use in and waste out" will probably appear. If you don't speak, your face-to-face communication skills will deteriorate. I talk about everything online, but I don't know what to say after meeting; Rare class reunion, but it has become "dust"; Reporting to the leader is far less easy than writing written opinions. Internet experts encounter embarrassment and social obstacles in reality, which is an important reason for the increasing number of housewives.

How come?

From "Concern" to "No Concern for Home"

The alienation of family and friendship.

In the era of Weibo, "attention" was the fastest and lowest way to make friends. What is friend XXX doing recently? Where have you been? A college student took intimate photos of his first girlfriend. What's the scandal about celebrities ... As long as you have your own Weibo, all this will be displayed through the Internet, no matter how far apart, just like living under one roof.

The internet seems to have brought people closer, but it is actually just a mirage. On the contrary, the Internet is alienating people. Meeting online every day, there is no body language, no eye contact, only simple words and funny pictures, and mutual understanding becomes superficial. Information published by people on the Internet is often filtered and modified. Good words may contain tears, complaining words may be complacent, and sweet words may hide a scam. Without face-to-face communication, we can't really understand, let alone trust, only through written information.

At the same time, family and friends who really need our attention and closeness have been repeatedly ignored. "Honey, let's go to the movies together" and "no time"; "Dad, I want to go to the playground" and "play by myself"; Dude, how about coming out for dinner? I can't come because of something. Refuse again and again, but push the family farther and farther and isolate yourself.

Why?

Why are social networks in full swing?

People's subconscious needs have been met.

Why is surfing the Internet addictive? Yu Jinlong, deputy director of the Psychological Counseling Department of the First Hospital of Guangzhou Medical University, said that this is often a manifestation of people's subconscious needs.

"Peeping"-people who observe other people's every move, words and deeds, and get * * * and * * * from it, I'm afraid people who often "dive" on the Internet have this mentality. Some people are purely curious, and some people are dissatisfied with their lives, so they point fingers at others on the Internet and even gloat. "Anyway, I see your jokes, and you don't know who I am." This gloomy mentality of "watching the excitement" hiding in the dark is infinitely magnified on the Internet.

"* * *"-the origin of human beings is naked, but with evolution, talents have moral constraints and a sense of shame. Although "* * *" has been suppressed to the subconscious since then, it will burst out from time to time. "* * *" not only refers to the exposure of the body, but also includes the exposure of the most secret things. The so-called salary, year-end bonus, privacy and wealth on the Internet actually have this mentality to some extent. In the surprise and devotion of onlookers, "* * *" will also be psychologically satisfied.

"vent"-nine times out of ten unpleasant things in real life, if you can't adjust yourself and have no channels to talk, surfing the Internet is undoubtedly the most ideal place for you to vent your pain, anger, grievances and sadness. Laugh and scold, do whatever you want, even if you say the worst things, at best, you will be deleted and blocked. Those who always play "critics", "cynics" and "riffraff" on the Internet often have too much psychological pressure and are not strong enough. It is typical to establish a psychological balance conducive to self-esteem by attacking others, or to project outward because self is unacceptable, so as to find a psychological balance in the online virtual world.

"Loneliness"-There is a saying on the Internet: "Brother is not online, lonely." The more lonely people are, the more they will pin their emotional catharsis on the Internet. They like watering, paying attention, visiting communities and forums, and prefer to "knit a scarf". It seems that they may be internet celebrities, but in fact, they lack close relationship with others. Unknown, lonely and difficult to get along with, in the crowd, they are often described as a group of people with no sense of existence. The more they are ignored, the more they want to seek satisfaction and comfort. Undoubtedly, the network has given them the greatest warmth.

"Anxiety"-Some people like to brush Weibo, surf Q, "grab the sofa" and read all kinds of information every day. It seems that it is not the first time for them to know something new on the Internet, so they become "outman". To this end, they can stay up all night, even eating, walking, taking the bus, and having meetings, they have to surf the Internet through their mobile phones. Although they can easily talk about the latest online terms and events, they can be called fashion frontier figures, but their hidden anxiety, confidence and fear are often worse than the average person, and their sense of loss will be stronger.

"Expect to be recognized"-no matter how ordinary, everyone wants to show their own value and get recognition from others. And everyone is equal, which is the biggest attraction of the network. Even if you don't have beauty, wealth and fame, you can become a celebrity overnight as long as you attract the attention of netizens. The popularity of "Sister Furong", "Sister Feng" and "Brother Sharp" is largely due to the collective subconscious psychology that "even small people can make great achievements". In them, the grassroots saw the hope of life.

Beware of "virtual social dependence"

Yu Jinlong said that surfing the Internet can not only keep abreast of information, but also kill time, relax and release stress. The characteristics of Internet, such as "privacy, security, equality, acceptance and free communication", have the function of psychotherapy to some extent. If you keep a proper degree, it should be said that there is a positive side. But many times, many people are over-surfing the Internet, which makes them psychologically dependent on the Internet. Just like drug addiction, they have lost their self-control. As soon as they leave the internet, they feel uncomfortable and fidgety. Only when they return to the Internet will they feel comfortable. This is a problem, which may be harmful to both body and mind.

"Everyone has multiple personalities. What is online may be your electronic personality. It may not behave like you at ordinary times, and there are many subconscious needs to be released. If you indulge in this, over time, your electronic personality will become stronger and stronger, thus surpassing your real self. At that time, returning to reality became a very painful thing, and even made you feel like escaping and giving up. "

Yu Jinlong said that only a strong personality in reality is the healthiest. But in fact, the more people indulge in virtual social interaction, the more depressed they will feel in reality. However, if you are too addicted to social networking, you will easily suffer from "virtual social dependence", which will lead to anxiety, depression, fear, compulsion, hypochondriasis, somatization and other symptoms. This will affect a person's social function and make him ignore his responsibilities in reality. In the family, the relationship between husband and wife and parent-child relationship becomes cold, and conflicts with leading colleagues are easy to occur at work, which will affect marriage and other aspects. At the same time, people who "escape from reality" through the virtual world often lack a sense of security, and there will be personality deviations such as loneliness and depression in reality.

How come?

What can you do to save your lost world?

1. If you find yourself relying too much on the Internet, which has affected your daily life and work, you can go to the psychological department of the hospital for help. Under the doctor's analysis, you will know what is influencing and manipulating you, so as to know yourself correctly.

2. always introspect. Ask yourself "What needs can social networks meet", "Why do I have such needs", "What impact does it have on me" and so on. Only through constant reflection and thinking can we face up to our own problems and find corresponding solutions.

3. Return to reality. Take off your vest on the internet and be yourself in reality. Through hard work, strive to improve career and interpersonal relationships. At the same time, maintain a good attitude, actively participate in various social activities, communicate with people more, and shape a sound personality.

4. Internet addiction and "virtual social dependence" often coexist, and the methods of self-care are-

Be self-disciplined when surfing the Internet, especially at night;

Usually, we should enrich our spare time, such as traveling, chatting with friends and taking part in some physical exercises.

If there are early symptoms, stop the operation in time;

Once IAD (Internet Addiction Syndrome, a modern new mental illness) appears, please seek help from the hospital psychology department as soon as possible.

Tip: How to diagnose virtual social dependence?

"Virtual social dependence" is a phenomenon that only appeared in the Internet age, and there is no formal medical diagnosis name and standard. Judging from its performance, some are similar to neurosis. To judge "virtual social dependence", we can refer to the diagnostic criteria of neurosis:

1. Patients are addicted to online social games, resulting in anxiety, depression, fear, compulsion, hypochondriasis, somatization or neurasthenia.

2. Symptoms have led to unavoidable social function damage or mental pain, prompting them to take the initiative to seek medical treatment;

3. The performance and behavior of the first two points should last at least three months.