Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - I have a child of 16 years old, who is very rebellious. What should I do?
I have a child of 16 years old, who is very rebellious. What should I do?
A good family relationship between parents and children is a good foundation for the exchange of ideas. Some parents usually have little communication with their children, and severely reprimand their children after problems arise. Over time, the emotional distance gradually widens, or children don't like their own hearts, so they get angry with the card, which makes the children have rebellious psychology and the emotional relationship is in trouble. It's no use talking in this situation. To this end, when talking with children, we should first create a harmonious atmosphere, tell jokes and happy things, and bring the emotional distance closer, and the effect will be much better.
Second, take advantage of the typical, seize the opportunity to speak.
Some things may happen to children themselves and around them at any time. If we grasp typical events and communicate in time, the effect will be better than usual. A junior one female student was molested by a boy from the same school outside the school. The girl student went home and told her parents about it. Her parents didn't lightly say to ignore those indecent boys, but inspired her to deal with such things, enhanced her ability to distinguish right from wrong and realized the ways to protect herself. After that, she reflected the matter to the teacher so that the problem could be dealt with in time.
Generally speaking, after the parent-teacher conference, children are most eager to talk to their parents. Seize this opportunity to get to know their children. Boys in Grade One of Senior High School usually don't pay enough attention to their studies, and their mid-term exam results are "sloppy". After the parent-teacher conference, he was anxious to know about it. The mother of the student didn't scold the child loudly. She seized this sensitive opportunity and kindly said to the child, "I feel very embarrassed at the parent-teacher meeting, which also proves that I usually care too little about you." I just hope you can find out the reason for your failure and win a sigh of relief for me in the final exam. "Children respect him. He confessed his lazy and playful behavior to his mother and said that he must catch up in the future. Later, he really made great progress. When children care about a problem, they are easy to listen.
Third, be targeted and clear about the theme.
It is necessary to be clear about children's ideas and solutions to problems, and to communicate in two ways around the theme in the conversation so that children can gain something. If you encounter sensitive issues, such as political events, emotional problems between parents and children's physical problems, don't avoid them. For those words that should not be said directly, you can take an indirect way, don't be ambiguous, and let the children be at a loss.
Fourth, be kind and eliminate conversation.
We should show our love for our children, make them willing to accept the conversation and avoid putting them on the defensive. "Go ahead" will make children feel "give me another political lesson." Or "You are such an idiot" and "See how I educate you." In this way, children can only be fortified layer by layer. If the opposition is strong, we can adopt the method of "cold treatment", temporarily postpone the conversation, or "curve talk" and start with other things. If children have something to say, they can put down what they are doing and listen to their own voices. You can't say, "I'm busy. Let's talk about it later." In this way, the opportunity is lost and the door to conversation is closed. Children will feel that they are not respected and will have distrust of their parents.
Fifth, choose ways to enhance the conversation effect.
A philosopher said, "There are no two identical leaves in the world." Children's personalities are different, which requires parents to choose the appropriate way of talking according to their characteristics. Commonly used methods are: direct narration. Children directly talk to their parents about a problem, and parents directly show their attitude to their children. Its characteristic is fast, but it is only suitable for extroverted children. Indirect method, tell children a short story, say an idiom, give an example, tell a few poems, or tell movies, novels, etc. Arouse children's interest in conversation and then lead them to the topic of conversation. Take a way that children can easily accept when talking to someone. You can talk to your father or mother alone, or three people together, or talk to your child's trusted relatives.
Sixth, the language is refined and the conversation time is grasped.
Children are opposed to verbosity and are most afraid of endless nagging. Enough is enough after the conversation has achieved its goal. Conversations can be held frequently, not for long talk, but for effect. In addition, when you speak, you might as well be humorous. A philosopher once said, "What's the harm in talking about the truth with a smile?" Humor relaxes people and makes children willing to talk happily. Sitting in a dangerous position is daunting, but it is actually "rejecting people away."
Talking with children is not to teach children, but to exchange ideas. Children are often eager to express their inner feelings and hope that their parents will pay attention to and understand themselves. Parents should take the initiative to guide their children to speak their minds, and after listening to their children's words, they should give timely feedback to make them feel "I am understood" or "I know".
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