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Comparison of Chinese and Western Views on Love

Different lifestyles and cultural concepts make the love concepts of Chinese and western literature completely different. We focus on China traditional literature and western literature, and compare their differences. Love constitutes the whole life and life of westerners, and love is everything. Mr. Zhu Guangqian has an incisive exposition on this: "Westerners attach importance to love and have the slogan" Love is the best ".

China people value marriage and despise love. ". In the west, the Middle Ages was a special "dark age". In the field of literature and art, you can only write about love for God, and writing about love becomes a crime. Even in this case, in the Middle Ages, Abaelard, a French scholastic philosopher and sentimental person, and Alice, a Parisian socialite, broke through many obstacles and fell in love. Although they are monks, they ignore the asceticism of the church and write many love poems praising the love between men and women, which are widely circulated among the people and have great influence. China people value marriage and despise love. ". So most emotional tragedies are marriage tragedies. The Peacock Flying Southeast with Tears focuses on the tragedy of marriage. Western knight literature is the representative of advocating the supremacy of love. There are two kinds of knight literature, knight lyric poetry and knight legend. Legend of the Knight depicts the knight's adventure of going through fire and water for a lady's love, while Lyrics of the Knight is all about the knight's love life and generally praises the knight's love and worship for a lady, among which Dawn is the most famous. In The Origin of Family, Private Ownership and State, Dawn was highly praised. He believes that the love between a knight and a noble woman is the real love compared with the marriage without love between a noble woman and her husband. China's poems about knight's life and love are rarely introduced, translated and published in China, so it is difficult to find relevant materials. At the same time, in all textbooks on the history of western literature published in China, knight literature has been mentioned briefly, and most textbooks do not give high evaluation to knight literature. Some textbooks think that knight lyrics are "the same" and knights "use this elegant love coat to cover up their corrupt and promiscuous life". Undoubtedly, our mainstream literary taste thinks that knight literature is unhealthy, worthless and unworthy of translation and introduction. If we don't talk about the aesthetic taste of western literature in general, it is at least quite different. In western literature, love is often regarded as an irresistible force. In the legendary knight Tristan and Zither, which is widely circulated in Germany and France, Tristan and Zither accidentally drank a medicinal liquor, and they have been in love for life ever since. Although they were abused by Kizer's husband, King Mark, their love will never be destroyed. Love in western literature can also make people get rid of bad luck and survive. Among the various versions of Snow White in the West, taking the American Disney cartoon Snow White as an example, the affectionate kiss of the prince is the secret of Snow White's resurrection from the dead. In Snow White, which was adapted from China on China TV, the plot was changed to when a dwarf buried Snow White, he accidentally tripped and made Snow White's. To say that life is real, the two descriptions about Snow White's resurrection from the dead are equally untrue. However, this reflects the different understanding of the status and power of love between Chinese and western literary concepts, and makes a vivid exposition. From this point of view, both of them are right. The characteristic of China traditional literature is that it is not love, but the national economy and people's livelihood, which is a major social problem in our view. Love is not important to us, and it is not allowed in most cases in history. "Poetry expressing ambition" is the general program of China's ancient poetry theory, that is, pure literature theory, but the word "expressing ambition" is very general, which mainly refers to spiritual ambition and ambition at that time. Therefore, poetry has always emphasized the tradition of elegance, and it is impossible to write about "family affairs" and "be immersed in love with children" without personal emotional space. The Preface to Mao's Poems gives full play to the role of "expressing ambition in poetry" and brings it into the level of literary and artistic policy, and makes detailed and specific provisions on the emotional expression and ideological content of poetry, such as "remonstrating with the main text" and "ending with the expression of courtesy and righteousness". Secondly, it also depicts the love between men and women. Under the influence of different cultural traditions between China and the West, literature shows profound differences. Western literature embodies the bold and frank singing of love, and at the same time, these songs contain strong factors. Praise for appearance and expression of love constitute a core theme of western love poems, and their emotions surge like a storm. Robert? A Red Rose by Burns: "My love is like a red rose, which blooms in April. My love is like a sweet song, played in harmony "; Byron's "The Maiden of Athens" sings repeatedly: "Please listen to my parting oath: you are my life, and I love you. ..... I will swear to the eyes like wild deer: You are my life, and I love you. ..... and my long-awaited red lips and slim waist. With these flowers, I want to say: you are my life and I love you. " These are unimaginable in China's traditional poems, even in the May 4th period when his thoughts were unprecedentedly active. Wang Jingzhi is famous for writing love poems. His collection of poems, Wind of Hui, was praised by Zhu Ziqing as "throwing bombs at old ethics" with the attitude of "singing heartily", which was once a sensation and almost ruined. Wang Jingzhi's famous sentence is "I offended people's accusations and looked back at my lover step by step. How gratified and frightened I am". From here, we can feel the social atmosphere at that time and the attitude towards love in the whole orthodox value system, which is also the attitude held by the mainstream cultural tradition in China. The characteristic of China traditional literature is that China literati are good at subtly and implicitly expressing women's psychological state and its subtle changes. Xu Gan, a poet in Jian 'an, wrote the famous Thinking of Rooms, which was highly praised by later generations for its romantic beauty. In the poem, he wrote: "Since the monarch came out, the mirror was dark and could not be cured. A gentleman thinks like running water, and he is too poor. " This kind of emotion is not burning like a fire, it is not a wave of waves, but a long stream of water. In China's Poems and Chinese Paintings, Qian Zhongshu said that R.C. Treviyan thought that "China's ancient poems are lyrical, never explicit, only implicit, not excited, not fanatical, and rarely use words, adjectives and metaphors". The reasons for this phenomenon are complex and diverse. From the perspective of social structure, China in history is a highly ethical patriarchal agricultural society, and all extramarital love between men and women is strictly prohibited. Love poems are usually written after marriage, because in ancient China, unmarried men and women were completely separated, and girls were confined to boudoir, such as Du Liniang in Tang Xianzu's Peony Pavilion, and the largest activity scope did not exceed the family. Young men and women in China have no conditions and no possibility of contact, and the whole society is particularly closed in this respect. The ancient western society was relatively open, and women enjoyed certain welfare. Noble women can go out to participate in social occasions and have the opportunity to contact the opposite sex, which is very different from ancient China society. Once men and women get along with each other day and night after marriage, there is no such intensity as first love. Even if the husband goes out to pursue fame and fortune and becomesno. 1, then the idea between husband and wife is completely different from that of lovers in love, which is more reflected in a relatively calm emotion, which is more rational and logical. Moreover, the arranged marriage and concubinage system in ancient China made it impossible for many couples to have deep feelings, so the emotional concentration was greatly diluted. If love is defined as fervor, then it can be considered that this kind of poem is not a real love poem, because it is far from the strong feeling of uneasiness and unwillingness to eat. This is the case with China's ancient poems about thinking about women, such as Wang Changling's in my heart forever, which is completely different from the adultery between knights and ladies at the expense of life and reputation described in the dawn of the Middle Ages in the West, so it is not difficult to understand that it is completely different in emotional intensity. In ancient China, due to the extremely low education level of women, there were few female poets, or because there was not much true feelings between husband and wife, or because of the shackles of feudal ethics, ancient China society was taboo to talk about the love between men and women and could not boldly reveal their thoughts and feelings. Therefore, most poems about thinking about women are written by men. "In the eyes of traditional literati, the feelings of boudoir are still as insignificant as those of family. Unelegant things "(Chen Yinque: a proof of Bai Yuan's poetry), so men dare not boldly reveal how they miss women, but try their best to find out and describe how women miss men, which has the nature of expressing opinions on behalf of others. Many topics involving women have become" resentment poems ",such as" resentment in spring ","palace resentment "and" in my heart forever ". These poems have a low emotional tone, little description of appearance, and no cheerful mood of looking forward to future happiness, which is completely different from westerners' bold and frank expression of admiration and yearning for women. Classical concept of love

Love should be eternal.

In heaven, we will see birds flying side by side

Growing together on the earth, two branches of a tree.

If this relationship is long-term.

Where should they be tied up every night?

True love stands the test.

Love is the eternal brand in my heart.

If you love someone, you must give up.

What belongs to me will naturally belong to me.

It is natural for men to pursue women.

It is shameful to turn your back on love.

True love comes only once in a lifetime.

Love, you are everything to me.

Love should not be separated from each other.

Where there is love, there is everything.

Modern concept of love

Just want to have it.

Never mind eternity.

Too tight will kill love.

You can't keep it all day.

Besides, it is far apart.

Don't test love.

Love is forgotten.

Give up if you can't catch up.

Love also needs competition.

Emotional pay should be equal.

It is understandable to give up love for the future.

Love can happen at any time in life.

Please give me room for development.

You and I are both independent individuals.

Love needs a material foundation.

4. Typical expressions of love and marriage in the West

Parsley, sage, rose and thyme (sage, rose and thyme) are a very important theme in western countries. Today, people have no special feelings for these four plants, but in the past, they gave people associations just like the relationship between red roses and love today, symbolizing that lovers are looking forward to their sweetheart and their own qualities.

According to people who believe in phytotherapy, parsley has the function of treating indigestion. For example, it is said that if you chew a parsley leaf while eating spinach, the bitterness of spinach will disappear and it will be easy to digest. Therefore, in the Middle Ages, parsley was endowed with a certain spiritual meaning. Salvia officinalis has a history of thousands of years and represents strength. Rosrinus officinalis expresses loyalty, love and care. In ancient Greece, men would give their lovers rosemary to show their love. Today, in Europe, brides still have the custom of tying rosemary branches to their heads. It is said that rosemary can make people sensitive and cautious, so in ancient Rome, when a person faced with mental stress, doctors often suggested putting a small bag of rosemary leaves under a pillow. Rosemary is sometimes used as a metaphor for women's love. Although a little slow, it is strong and lasts for a long time. On the night of the legendary Mid-Autumn Festival, the king danced wildly with the gods in the jungle of Thymus in the wilderness. But thyme usually symbolizes courage. In the Middle Ages, there was a baili image embroidered by his woman on the knight's shield.

Therefore, when lovers are frustrated, they will use these four plants, which were widely known in the Middle Ages, hoping that their lovers can melt their misunderstanding and pain with the gentleness of love, spend their hard time of separation with perseverance, accompany lonely days with loyalty, and challenge the impossible with courage.

In the west, love and death are an eternal theme, and they are often together. The poet Richard Krasa has a poem: "Love, you are the only master of life and death." "Love, you are the highest and only monarch of life and death."

In English poetry, love and death, like other abstract concepts, can be perceived, speculated and interpreted as being beyond the real world. However, in China culture, there is no such ideal world beyond reality and its corresponding expression. Love and death, in English poetry, are not necessarily related to the concrete objective world and the poet's real life, but mostly internalized thoughts and abstract emotional expressions. In "I have a whim", "My eyes are always fixed on the slowly falling moon wheel. /What strange idea, stupid and confused,/will sneak into your lover's mind! "My God!" I shouted to myself/"in case Lucy dies!" " . When I compare my lover to a rose, I think of my lover's death. This is unexpected for orientals.

Similar descriptions of love and death, this life and the afterlife, an English poem: william blake's Love Garden, a closed funeral parlour was built on the grass, and the place where flowers were in full bloom was covered with graves and tombstones ... Love and death seemed to be just a vague thing, a dream and an idea. This way of symbolizing love and death as two abstract lives reminds people of the spirit of love and death.

From this point of view, death due to love, whether it is emotional expression, rational speculation or actual action, can be regarded as the same goal of two instincts, killing two birds with one stone. People are separated by losing love, separated by life, and returned by dying of love. Then, dying for love is the most thorough and abundant reward.

There are significant differences between Chinese and western cultures in dealing with the love between men and women. For westerners, love is supreme. Men can sacrifice everything for love, while women will give up everything for love. This is the supremacy of love. The choice and marriage of the two sexes are completely based on love, regardless of family background, age, social status and other factors.

Not suitable for China people. China's marriage is not based on love. Marriage can be without love, and love may not guarantee the realization of marriage. "All shall be well, jack shall have Jill" is, after all, a human ideal. For the average person, the combination of men and women is only for the need of survival; Women marry men in order to find something to live on; When a man looks for a woman, he should also consider various factors, such as economy, birth, family background, etc., and also consider the impact on his future.

It can be said that marriage and love in the west are emotional needs, and love is her foundation, so there are "golden marriage, silver marriage" and "honeymoon", all of which are romantic; China people's love and marriage are more rational choices. It is doubtful how much true love there is in this rational choice. Therefore, marriage and love in China are far less romantic than in the West.

In the west, love is supreme, love is the most sacred, it is the most sacred part of human emotions, and it must not be defiled. This makes it as sacred and absolute as a religious idol. At the same time, it is also the extreme of human emotions, so it is highly irrational.

But not from China. China people lack this sense of sacredness. For men, career is higher than love; For women, marriage is only the guarantee of survival. "Marry Han, marry Han, dress and eat" is completely the need of survival. The so-called "marry a chicken with a chicken, marry a dog with a dog", there is no personal choice at all, let alone love.

Of course, people in China also have love, but it is not necessarily related to marriage. Marriage and love are two completely different things. At least we can say that China people's attitude towards love is far less sacred and lofty than that of westerners. This is the difference between Chinese and western cultures in their views on marriage and love.

Sometimes it is really difficult to understand the continuation of conditional marriage in modern society. The society has entered the information age, and the "situation" changes more and more frequently. Today you are healthy, maybe something will happen tomorrow ... Today you live comfortably, maybe your investment will fail tomorrow ... Today you are still in Andy Lau, and ten years later you are Grandpa Liu ... The "condition" has been lost, so should the marriage made of conditions be over? I think the rising divorce rate in China may be related to this old concept, which deserves people's deep thinking.