Interesting sentences, dear, what is death (40 selected sentences)

1, m: Have you ever held a boy's hand? Woman: Does wrist fracture count?

2, don't be happy, according to reliable sources, you have ended all legal holidays in X years.

3. Other people's faces: faces. Your face: face plus. Other people's breasts: breasts. Your chest: chest: chest mini

4, people often say that you are fat, you cut him, * * *, shameless, eat your rice.

5. Woman: You don't love me. Man: Why don't I love you? Woman: My finger is broken. You won't help me smoke. Man: That's because you have Hong Kong feet.

6, this season, walking on the road is the middle point, oblique bangs, great light constantly changing, washing and cutting from time to time, and perhaps randomly raping the head.

7. I asked my boyfriend: Dear, what is death? He looked at me and said, you are a fat man, fat and ugly, and you love to be spoiled. Who gives you confidence?

8. A: My advantage is high IQ and good moral integrity. B: Can you understand jokes with high IQ? A: I understand every second! B: Then you have the nerve to say that you have moral integrity!

9. Anemia was found in the physical examination of a buddy's hospital. We are very concerned. Is it caused by diet? This product has been pondering for a long time and said that there are too many mosquitoes.

10, children's shoes, can you lend me some money? If possible, wait for me at the school gate after school. If not, wait for me at the school gate after school!

1 1. One day, Avatar and the Smurfs met in the toilet, accidentally saw each other's poop, and immediately shook hands and said, Brother, you are from Lan Xiang ~ ~ ~

12, Today's Father's Day, I saw the back of Teacher Zhu Ziqing in the textbook. After reading the article, I really cried because it said: recite the last three paragraphs of the text.

13. Have you heard of Amway? My sister got up and left without looking at me. The subway was so crowded that I found a seat easily.

14, I recently heard that the iPhone pocket may be deformed when squeezed. What I want to say is that you don't have to worry about this problem. Is it possible to wear clothes with pockets for the iPhone you just bought?

15. Sometimes two people who are chatting happily on the Internet don't talk much when they meet, probably because they don't show their faces when they meet. Finally found the reason!

16, once I was eating in the canteen, my friend picked up a cucumber: Why is this cucumber strange? Aunt in the canteen strikes the table: Don't talk nonsense! I haven't used it!

17, my classmates said there was a shortage of groomsmen and bridesmaids at the wedding, and invited me to go. I didn't expect that I caught everyone's attention, and it was all my clothes. The black suit fits well, and the wedding dress inside is a little small.

18, female: I want to eat chocolate! Man: I'll take it! Man: I bought it to eat! Woman: Honey, I want to eat dark chocolate! The man silently took out his sunglasses and said, take it to eat!

19, I went to work in the morning. I waited for half an hour for the bus to come, so I couldn't help but make a move! Sure enough, I just lit a cigarette and took a drag. I saw the bus coming towards hellip from a distance.

20. My girlfriend broke up with me and said I was poor. I am poor. You are blind. One day I drove a Mercedes-Benz BMW. You call me poor? Distance: Xiao Li, come and park my car. Stop and drive an Audi.

2 1, the girl bent down to join the pickpocket group and was caught laughing on the bus. The police soon learned that she only believed what netizens told her, and girls who loved to laugh would not be too lucky.

22.M: I swear to be good to you all my life! Woman: Really Man: Hmm! Woman: Are you willing to die for me? M: Yes! A woman slaps: You are not afraid of swearing! Then he turned and left.

23. I got a haircut today. The barber said, you have too much white hair! Dye! I said: ok! People are much younger after being dyed black! When I got home, my wife slapped me: What do you mean by dyeing your hair?

24. As soon as I entered the company after graduating from college, my boss bought me a new car of 350,000 yuan and arranged for me the most skilled driver in the company. But I am not happy every day. Did I learn to drive a forklift here for four years in college?

25. A boy confessed to the goddess: Looking back on the past life, in exchange for the encounter in this life. We were not together in our last life. We are destined to be together. The goddess said flatly: I have never seen you in my last life. Do you think you have a chance?

26. Tell my classmates to have children. My classmate said that when his wife gave birth to a child, the male doctor was the chief surgeon, and his wife was embarrassed to take off her clothes. The male doctor said, don't be embarrassed. Now I see you are all numb, just like watching a white striped chicken.

27. Work overtime at night and sit in front of the computer to sort out the information. Suddenly, a female colleague began to cry and came to me crying: my colleague bullied me and said I looked scared. Don't listen to their nonsense! Half an hour later, I finally woke up to comfort her.

28. In the waiting room of the railway station, a girl is feeding durian to her boyfriend. I really can't see it if no one fills the waiting room with durian. I went over to the girl and said, this is a public place. Please consider whether everyone's feelings can support me.

29. In the gym, I saw a fat girl walking slowly on the treadmill. I once reminded her: Sister, you must speed up, or you won't lose weight. Sister listened to the wronged answer: I adjust it quickly, but step on it slowly!

30. I read an article today entitled: You can't drink the water that has just boiled, and drinking water is the top ten deadly habits. Sister hasn't read any books after reading, just want to add a little. The most important thing is that the author has dropped a little. The reason why she can't drink the freshly boiled water is: burning her mouth.

3 1, I saw a bone-touching fortune teller today, so I went up and touched it. Touched for a long time, his expression was heavy and he kept sighing. I was scared to shit and asked, master, what's the good news? He is still sighing, and I am anxious: you say it! The master said: For the first time in decades, my husband couldn't touch the bone. It's all meat.

32. In the emergency room, the doctor asked me to lie on a stretcher, scarred: How did I get hurt like this? I said: I just drove and passed a beautiful woman on the road. I looked back at the doctor and smiled: What was the result? I said: I didn't hit anywhere, and the co-pilot's wife found out.

33. I went back to my alma mater and walked on campus today. I saw the blackheads in the classroom burying their heads in self-study. Thinking of myself, I couldn't help going to my old classroom. In order not to disturb them, I went to the back door and put my head out of the window. Then several students quickly put away their novels, and when they saw me, they said, I'm so scared.

34. Recently, the iPhone is on fire. My friends always complain that my girlfriend wants an iPhone. Personally, I don't think this is a special mobile phone. Give it to your girlfriend. Why? Isn't this just a few thousand dollars? Do you need such a big surprise? Send it if your girlfriend likes it. I have no girlfriend anyway.

I saw a girl sitting in the car and a boy standing beside her with a bag. The girl said to the boy, put your bag on my lap. Boy: It's too heavy. Put it on the ground. Girl: The ground is dirty. I am not afraid of weight. The boy let go, and then the thief said, I feel so heavy. Girl: Put it on the ground.

A: I have a complicated polygamous relationship with a Gao Fushuai and four girls. B: Tell me how complicated it is. I like these four girls at the same time, and all four girls like Gao Fushuai. B: This is the so-called complex multi-angle love, which has nothing to do with you. But this Gao Fushuai only likes me. B:

I quarreled with my girlfriend this morning. Going home at night, I still want to know if she is still angry and wants to fight the cold war. When she got home, she was not there. She opened the door and saw the scene in front of me. I cried. What a virtuous woman! She tidied up the house in a mess this morning, leaving me no furniture and appliances.

38. While waiting for the bus at the railway station, a handsome guy suddenly called out my name: Who are you? It's me. Is it? Think about it. Sorry, I really don't remember. Were you born on XX, XX, XX? Yes! Don't remember me? I really don't remember. You let me think about it. Forget it. You lost your ID card and returned it to you.

39. I wore the same model I bought with my girlfriend in the afternoon. T-shirt shopping I went to the cafe to rest and saw two handsome guys sitting next to me. They kept looking at us and whispering to each other. We whispered about who was more handsome. Suddenly, one of them suddenly came over. Our heartbeat accelerated the collision of deer! Handsome guy smiled at us, embarrassed to say, where do two beautiful women buy this kind of couple clothes? My boyfriend wants it too.

40. A middle-aged man came to see a psychiatrist. He told the doctor that on my busy wedding night, the bride ran away, leaving a shadow in her heart and afraid to accept love again. The doctor asked: Do you want to untie this shadow and accept love again? The man said, no, I'm here to ask about this shadow area. A young man pretended to be clean. One day, he found a farmer with a big stool from a distance. He began to cover his mouth and nose. When he approached the dung bucket, he couldn't help it. He began to breathe. Farmers talk to themselves; And this preference!