Nanny Xiao Tang's prose

The "leader's" mother accidentally fell and fractured her right femur. After hospitalization and some emergency treatment, other problems were basically solved, and the rest was the healing of the femur. The old man was 88 years old. The doctor said that he was not suitable for surgery and suggested conservative treatment. He was discharged from the hospital and returned home to recover slowly. Since the old man was bedridden and unable to move, we decided to hire a nanny to take care of my mother at home.

In the afternoon, the "leader" called from the housekeeping company and said that he had hired a nanny. He was from the rural area of ??Zhijiang next door. He was in his 50s. He had worked as a nanny before and worked in a Shenzhen restaurant. After more than an hour, the "leader" and his sister-in-law came back with the nanny. The "leader" pointed to the middle-aged woman following behind and said, "She is Aunt Tang. She comes to our house to provide care for my mother."

The visitor smiled at us as a greeting.

She has an upright face and a dark complexion. Her long, lustrous hair is tied behind her head, with some silver threads squeezed out. The years have carved a few shallow wrinkles on her face. He is about 1.6 meters tall and looks healthy, energetic and strong. She put a large travel bag containing her personal belongings against the wall, sat down at the dining table in the hall, and said shyly: "If I hadn't met you, I wouldn't know where I would stay tonight. "

The "leader" explained to me: "When we met Aunt Tang at the housekeeping company, we explained our family's situation and basic requirements. Aunt Tang said she was willing to come to our home for nursing. After briefly introducing her situation to us, we decided to hire her. We originally thought about asking her to come back two days after her mother was discharged from the hospital. She said that she just came out of her home in the country and had no acquaintances in the city and no place to go. She said, "It doesn't matter. She agreed to stay at our house today." She immediately said, "I don't want to pay for the two days before the old man is discharged from the hospital."

I quickly said, "Okay, welcome, welcome." ! This can be regarded as a coincidence, which means that we are destined. Anyway, my mother will be discharged from the hospital in two days.”

The “leader” placed Aunt Tang in her room. Next to my mother's bed, there is a sofa-style movable single bed, which is prepared for the nanny. Aunt Tang put her bag on the sofa bed and saw a mop next to it. It was the mop I had just mopped the floor and put it on the wall. She picked up the mop and started mopping the floor. I quickly told her not to be anxious and to rest first. She said "it's okay, it's okay" and started working skillfully. I thought to myself: This nanny is really proactive and quick in her work.

"Aunt Tang, we are all older than you, so we will call you Xiao Tang from now on."

"Okay, okay!" She responded quickly and said simply: " Then I’ll call you big brother and big sister.”

The next day, we went to the hospital to take care of our mother, and Xiao Tang had to go with us. She said: "I will go to get to know the elderly first, and also go to the hospital to familiarize myself with the specific care."

In the hospital, we invited an aunt named Li to take care of my mother. When Xiao Tang arrived at the hospital, he took the initiative to help Aunt Li, asking questions, cleaning, massaging, turning over, and giving medicine to her mother. She would do anything as long as she could get her hands on it. This makes Aunt Li a little embarrassed to have so much free time.

When my mother returned home after being discharged from the hospital, the main responsibility for taking care of her fell on Xiao Tang. After two days of "internship" in the hospital and having done nursing work for the elderly, she seemed to be very familiar with the situation. What surprised me the most was that my mother was a little constipated, and she actually used her hands to help her. This is something that ordinary nannies cannot and are not willing to do. In this regard, she seemed very normal and said: "It's nothing. When doing housework at home, I often have to deal with feces."

After a few days, maybe because she became familiar with it, Xiao Tang, who was not very talkative, slowly started to talk more. She said that her family lived in a remote mountain village in Zhijiang. Her family was relatively poor. Her two children were already in their thirties and both were working outside. In recent years, she and her husband have also worked in Shenzhen, washing dishes in different restaurants. She has a cheerful personality and is good at sociability, and she helped find her husband's job. When I returned to my home in the countryside in March this year, I no longer planned to work out because I had saved some money and planned to build a new house at home.

Unexpectedly, her mother-in-law, who had some conflicts with her and was mentally ill, made trouble for her every day and pulled out all the vegetables she planted. There is a wife on one side and a mentally ill mother on the other. They are at odds with each other. No matter how much persuasion is done, it is useless. The wife is silent and the mentally ill mother is always nagging and unwilling to give up. The husband was helpless and angrily returned to Shenzhen to work. Due to the constant interference from his mother-in-law, Xiao Tang lost all thoughts about building a house and decided that he could not afford the house for the time being. He would just go out and find something to do to make money in order to stay clean.

I asked her: "Why don't you go back to Shenzhen to work with your husband?"

She said: "The restaurant owner called me and asked me to go back. I thought, Washing dishes there is not too tiring, but the working hours are a bit long and the income is not high. Forget it, I don’t want to go there anymore. I want to find something to do here, it’s close to home, and I’m used to it. , I’m a little older, and I don’t want to wash dishes anymore.”

“That’s right.” I asked, “How long does it take to work in a restaurant?”

“ From nine o'clock in the morning to two o'clock in the afternoon, from five o'clock in the afternoon to ten and a half in the evening."

"Ah, a total of eleven and a half hours, which is equivalent to three and a half hours more every day!" After a pause, I asked her: "Do you specialize in washing dishes?"

"Mainly washing dishes, but also washing vegetables and other things."

I said with emotion: "Time It’s quite long. Is there any overtime pay?”

“There is no overtime pay! It’s as long as it’s paid per month. No matter how long the working hours are, there’s no overtime pay.”

I I immediately thought of seeing an article on the Internet that revealed how private bosses cleverly extract the sweat of workers. The main method is to extend working hours and not pay overtime labor in accordance with labor laws. This is almost the same as what Marx said in "Das Kapital" .

Hearing her mother humming, she went into the room and asked her mother if she wanted to drink water. After getting confirmation, she gave her mother some water. Back in the living room, she talked to me about her part-time job again.

"I wash dishes very quickly. Others have to do three hours of work, but I finish it in two hours. Once I finished washing the dishes and had nothing to do, so I just watched TV on my phone. My boss happened to notice me. He criticized me for not watching TV at work. I thought to myself, I have finished my work and I have nothing else to do, so why don’t I watch TV on my phone? I argued with the boss. At this time, the boss was not happy and said to me coldly: "You can watch TV during work hours? You want to watch TV at home. You don't have to come tomorrow!" Is this unreasonable? I was so angry that I yelled at the boss: "If you don't want to do it, you can pay me now!" The boss said, "You can come back tomorrow." Didn't you tell me not to come tomorrow? You have to pay me today! 'The boss knew he was in the wrong, so he had to pay me the bill and give me my salary."

"This kind of private boss is like this. He doesn't follow labor laws and does everything possible to deprive workers. However, it is indeed wrong for you to watch TV at work. The boss is not wrong to criticize you. However, he wants you to work so long and does not allow you to work overtime. The salary was also exorbitant. "

"After I came out, I quickly found a job as a dishwasher in another restaurant. It turned out that the new dishwasher hired by the boss was slow and did a bad job. I need help from others to finish washing the dishes. The boss called me and wanted me to go back, but I refused and refused.”

“Yes, it’s work everywhere, now that I’m out. , How can I go back?" I echoed her.

Xiao Tang is quite dedicated in taking care of the elderly and has some experience. She always feeds, drinks water, turns over, washes feet, wipes body and changes clothes for the elderly at regular intervals, with a strong sense of procedure. Sometimes we also step in to help her, and she always says: "I will take care of the elderly, and you can go about your business."

I said: "It is also our duty to help you. Well, you need to take a break too."

She insisted: "If I can't do it, I will naturally ask you for help. Now, it's enough for me.

"

However, after all, she has no education. According to her own words, she has only been in elementary school for a few years, and she still asked my "leader" for help when she saved a phone number in her mobile phone.

Once, she took her old-fashioned mobile phone and asked me: "Brother, do you think there is something wrong with my mobile phone? Why can't I always use the radio?" ”

I haven’t used this old-fashioned mobile phone for many years, and I forgot how to activate the radio. I fiddled with it for a while, found the radio program in the settings, and just turned it on. I explained how to use the radio. After telling her one by one, she actually smiled like a child and said happily: "This way, I won't feel lonely. ”

Because he is uneducated, Xiao Tang is accustomed to doing things based on experience and taking things for granted. His mother has been lying in bed for a long time, is weak, and has a poor appetite. Sometimes she doesn’t want to eat, so she feeds her porridge. Xiao Tang continued to feed her mother's mouth without swallowing it, and pushed her mother's chin with her hands to open and close her mouth. She wanted to encourage her mother to swallow. . I immediately stopped Xiao Tang from doing such a reckless thing and told her: "Mom doesn't want to eat because she has a bad appetite. Please wait a moment before feeding her." "Sure enough, after a while, when feeding again, my mother quickly finished half the bowl of porridge.

Afterwards, Xiao Tang explained to me: "When I was taking care of a mother-in-law named Zhang, I This is also done, and the effect is okay. ”

I said: “Everyone’s situation is different, and the nursing methods must also vary from person to person and cannot be simply copied.” Because my mother has a weak constitution and poor swallowing function, the method you used before is obviously not suitable. There are too many things in her mouth, which will affect her breathing. If she chokes, it will be troublesome. ”

She said nothing more and nodded slightly.

Another time, Xiao Tang brought a bowl of fried chicken to the dining table and looked at the chicken that had just come out of the pot. The aroma of the delicious food made me happy and I said, "It smells so good." ”

Xiao Tang said: “I stir-fry first, stir-fry until fragrant, then add water to simmer, then add spices, collect the juice, and take it out of the pot. "

"The leader" said: "It might be better if it is stewed. "

Xiao Tang said: "Stew? It doesn't smell good, it doesn't taste good. "

I thought to myself that Xiao Tang had little experience after all, and she could only cook cooked food. I said in a conciliatory way: "Sauteing is also a common practice. In terms of nutrition, of course stewing requires Better, with the least damage to nutrients. This is called radish and cabbage, everyone loves it. ”

One morning, I just woke up and heard my mother coughing. I didn’t pay much attention to it at first, because my mother had been having a dry cough since she was discharged from the hospital, but she didn’t cough very frequently. She would cough once or twice. Okay. But today, my mother coughed for more than ten minutes and still didn’t stop. I ran to my mother’s room and the “leader” was wiping her feet. I said, “What’s going on today? Something seems not normal. "

"The leader" wiped his feet and said, "I don't know. "

"Do you have a cold? "

At this time, Xiao Tang came in. I asked her: "Did you turn on the air conditioner last night? "

"It's open. "

"When will it be open? "

"Two o'clock in the middle of the night. "

"Oh, it must be a cold. "I explained: "When people fall asleep, their resistance decreases, especially the elderly. They are more likely to catch a cold if the air conditioner is blown while they are asleep. ”

Xiao Tang complained: “I turned on the air conditioner to 26 degrees, and the eldest sister wanted to adjust it to 28 degrees. Maybe the temperature of the air conditioner was too low. ”

I was a little amused that she didn’t even know the relationship between the air conditioner and the temperature. So I went further and explained: “The higher the air conditioner is turned on, the higher the temperature will be; conversely, The lower you turn it on, the cooler the temperature will be. "

She seemed to suddenly realize: "I really don't know this. I thought the higher the temperature, the lower the temperature. ”

The “leader” applied a hot towel to my mother’s neck for a while, and her cough slowly subsided.

After these things, I said to the "leader" privately: "Xiao Tang takes the initiative in doing things and takes care of the elderly with great dedication. But after all, she lacks culture, knowledge, and limited knowledge. Sometimes she is a little self-righteous. She didn't take the initiative to ask us if she was not allowed to cook. We could eat whatever she wanted. I really didn't expect that she couldn't even turn on the air conditioner, which almost caused my mother to get cold. If my mother is given medicine without asking us, I am worried that she will be accustomed to doing things according to her understanding and experience. If she gives her the wrong medicine, she will be in big trouble. Therefore, we must explain it clearly to her beforehand, and more. Pay attention and give timely guidance to avoid mistakes."

"Yes, I also discovered this problem." The "leader" said: "One afternoon, I saw Xiao Tang preparing to feed his mother. I asked her, "Didn't you take the antihypertensive medicine in the morning?" She said, "Isn't it twice a day?" I told her that the doctor had clearly stated that the antihypertensive medicine should be taken only once a day. She could eat it once. Then she said sheepishly: "I'm sorry, I forgot." However, in general, Xiao Tang did a good job in caring for his mother, although there were some shortcomings, which were minor issues. As long as we are more careful, try to explain the relevant matters to her clearly in advance, observe and communicate with her more, to prevent her from making her own decisions based on her subjective wishes."

I agree with the "leader". view. When treating a nanny, you must first respect the other person and treat the nanny as a member of the family as an equal. You cannot blindly point fingers at them or be superior, which makes people feel that there are differences in personality. When it comes to caring for our mother, we try to be more thoughtful and explain things to her more specifically, so as to bring into play her strengths and make up for her shortcomings.

While chatting with us, Xiao Tang also told us some of their "family scandals", which shows that she already trusts us. At this time, we tried our best not to express our opinions, but listened carefully to her narrative, and dealt with it submissively and noncommittally. I find it impolite and inconvenient to make irresponsible remarks about other people's family affairs. After all, what we heard were her one-sided words, so we just point fingers easily, which is careless and may be unfair. Maybe she just confided some of her unhappiness to us to relieve her inner boredom. Here, besides us, she really has no one else to talk to, and she does not expect us to make any judgment on her confession.

Xiao Tang is fast-talking and doesn’t mince words. Sometimes she is a bit stubborn. She never shy away from us. One day, the doctor came to change my mother's dressing and asked us: "Have you massaged the old man's broken foot?"

I said: "Twice a day."

The doctor said: "No massage."

This was completely different from what the doctor said when I was hospitalized. I couldn't help but feel a little confused.

Xiao Tang, who was standing next to me, immediately said to me: "I said no massage, but your wife insists on massage."

"You massage like this," the doctor said The massage action further explained: "This will cause the foot to rotate axially and affect the healing of the fractured bones."

The doctor left, and Xiao Tang was still mumbling about the topic just now. She seemed to want to To prove your experience. This somewhat made me unhappy, so I stopped her: "Stop talking about it. The doctor specially told me about the massage when I was hospitalized. At that time, it was mainly because my mother's affected leg had been being traction and could not move, and she was worried about the possibility of Venous thrombosis can lead to pathological changes. Now my mother's condition has improved greatly, and the possibility of venous thrombosis is unlikely. The main reason is to consider the healing of the fracture. The doctor's request to no longer massage is naturally correct, and the requirements will naturally vary according to the period. , we just follow the doctor’s instructions, we can’t simply say whether massage is right or wrong.”

Of course, we are not doctors after all, and we have to listen to the doctor’s advice when it comes to care, and some of our practices may also be different. The element of subjective desire. However, when the doctor does not have new requirements on what should be done and what should not be done, of course we will follow what the doctor said before.

Xiao Tang's statement may be just a coincidence. She has never taken care of similar patients before, and does not really know when massage can be performed and when massage cannot be performed.

Despite this, I still somewhat approve of Xiao Tang’s tenacity. She expresses her true thoughts and does not want to flatter others, especially us, her customers.

Xiao Tang prefers watching TV. She doesn’t watch news or songs and dances. She just likes to watch TV series. She likes to watch "Mom's Love" which is currently being broadcast on Hunan TV. As long as she has time, she almost A must read every issue. After dinner every day, she would give her mother good medicine and feed her, then wipe her body and wash her feet. After doing this, my mother began to fall asleep, and the TV series "Mom's Love" was about to begin. She sat in front of the TV and began to watch the TV series seriously. As the plot progresses, she often comments to herself on the plot, sometimes laughing, and is extremely involved. However, as soon as she heard something from her mother, she would quickly run to her mother's room to check, showing a certain degree of professional sensitivity. In the afternoon, I don't know which channel it was on, but there was "Journey to the West", and she watched it too. Once, my brother-in-law saw her watching "Journey to the West" and asked her: ""Journey to the West" is an old TV series many years ago. Have you not seen it?"

Her eyes did not leave the TV screen. , said: "I have seen it. As long as there is something to watch, I still want to watch it. This "Journey to the West" movie is very good." It can be said that she is a fan of "Journey to the West".

We also try our best to take care of Xiao Tang’s entertainment hobbies. In the afternoon, or after eight o’clock in the evening, it is often the time for mom to fall asleep and rest. At this time, we take the initiative to take care of mom and let Xiao Tang watch TV. . Although there is no explicit agreement between us, we know each other well and have become a general rule, and we cooperate with each other tacitly.

One day at noon, Xiao Tang answered the phone. On the phone, she sounded excited and spoke unkindly. Afterwards, she told me that it was her youngest son who called her. So, she told me about her youngest son.

Her younger son is already in his early thirties and has a girlfriend who is from Shaanxi. He met her while working in Dongguan and they have lived together for several years. Later, they ran a clothing production factory. All her son's money was invested in the clothing factory, but the management was poor and the clothes produced could not be sold. The factory closed down and all the money was wasted. As a result, the son had a conflict with his girlfriend, and the girlfriend left her son. Later, a girl from Jiangxi who worked with her pursued her son. Her son also liked the girl very much and even came to their home. However, the girl has a four-year-old child. Because her husband is lazy, loves to play cards, and is very careless about the family, the two often quarrel. For this reason, she wanted to divorce her husband and pursue her son, and she is still obsessed with him to this day. She had reminded her son that she was a married woman, and if she kept pestering her like this, wouldn't she be afraid of delaying her? But her son wouldn't listen and said, "I make the decision in my own affairs."

"Alas, it's not up to the mother to grow up!" She sighed heavily and said helplessly: " I have said everything that needs to be said, let him go, I don’t care anymore!”

Looking at her suffocated and helpless look, I felt a little sympathy for her. So I said to her seriously: "Your youngest son's matter is essentially an extramarital affair, involving legal issues. If the woman really wants to get along with your son, she must make up her mind to dissolve her existing marriage as soon as possible. Otherwise, it is very likely that Just like his previous relationship, the money was spent and the love ended. "

"This is unlikely because they have been together for several years. The woman really liked my son. ." Xiao Tang's determination came back.

I further explained: "Since we have been together for several years and the woman is sincerely pursuing your youngest son, why can't she get divorced?"

"The man doesn't I am willing."

"What if the man uses legal means to sue your son for destroying his family as a third party?"

"I didn't think about it? Passed." She fell silent.

I know that she has little education and limited knowledge. How could she think of such a profound problem?

"Xiao Tang, don't think about this problem. This is the reality your son faces. Once he gets involved in a lawsuit, it will be very troublesome. First, it will hurt your nerves. Second, it will hurt your money. It will also cost you money. Your son’s great years.”

Xiao Tang was silent. My words seemed to touch her and began to cause her to think seriously.

After that, I went back to my hometown in the countryside to visit my brother. When I came back the next day, Xiao Tang and the "leader" were talking about her younger son's date in the living room again. She said: "What my elder brother said that day made sense to me. Later I called my son to remind him and asked him to handle the matter properly as soon as possible, learn from the previous lesson, and don't be fooled again. Otherwise, you will have to work for many years. , but in the end, my son was still empty-handed. However, my son said on the phone: "Mom, why do you keep mentioning money? I am over 30 years old, you have to believe me..." She said seriously. He sighed and shook his head again, looking very helpless: "I made it very clear. My son just can't listen, and I can't help it. Just let him be."

I interrupted. : "Your son has probably fallen into a trap. If you don't mention money, he will be fooled again and waste all his money and time. How can he live on and find a partner?" Her son's attitude was, It also made me feel helpless.

The "leader" interjected: "Your son is as old as him, so you have fulfilled your responsibilities as a mother. However, you can't give up easily. If you persuade him a few more times, you may understand." Come here."

Xiao Tang said helplessly: "That's all."

The matter of her younger son really bothered her, but it didn't affect her. When it comes to caring for the elderly, she seems to be a different person as soon as she starts doing things. The sadness on her face disappears. She talks and laughs with the "leader" from time to time, and occasionally makes a joke or two with her mother to make her happy. . Her professionalism and good psychological quality left a deep impression on me.