See yourself grateful to meet-draft-draft-draft.

Have the urge to write something. After reading the biography of Zeng Guofan and meeting Mr. Liu, this idea changed from an idea to an action. I want to record my life by getting up early every day. Look how I spent 26 years.

? First of all, I must introduce myself: Su Nana, born on the second day of July, 1993, from Anshun City, Guizhou Province. The ID card is the birthday of 8 1. It was later verified that I should have been born in August of 1993. I feel that I have three birthdays: the legal birthday, the lunar birthday that my family likes, and the real solar birthday.

? There are also many stories about my name. I am the eldest daughter of my family, and my father named me Su Lang when he had a cousin. Up to now, my name at home is Su Lang. Only my family and people in the same village will call me that. There will be thousands of children. Why? Why do I have a boy's name? The explanation given by my parents is: the name given by my aunt means I hope I can succeed in the future. In their view, the word "wandering around the world" means that the more promising you are, the farther you will go. The name of the second person in my life was given by my grandfather. Yes 1999. Grandma bought me a small red schoolbag and sent me back to grandma's school. Grandpa took me to sign up for school, and the children who go to school in their hometown will have a scientific name. I remember that my scientific name was given by my grandfather when he submitted materials to the teacher.

The teacher said: "Old people and children will have a scientific name when they go to school now. What do you think your granddaughter's name is? "

Grandpa: "What name do you want to talk about?" Grandpa didn't seem to think of a name for me in advance.

After consulting with my teacher, I finally decided on my scientific name: Sue. This name is only called by my primary school classmates, teachers and some middle school classmates. This is also a life gift left by grandpa after so many years of death. Although I don't like this scientific name, it was left to me by my grandfather. The third name is Su Nana on the current ID card. Starting from junior high school, you need to have the same name as the household registration book. Only then did I know that my real name in law was Su Nana. At that time, I thought the name was quite strange. I don't want my name to become so awkward after my junior high school entrance examination, so I lost a word in my middle school days and changed myself to Nasu, so my name among my middle school classmates and teachers is Nasu. I met the senior high school entrance examination again, and the name of the exam was filled in by Su Nana. Su Nana has been with me since high school. By listening to my name, you can know when we met. By the way, I began to ask my parents again, "Why do I have such a strange name?"

My parents always replied: "At that time, we were in Jiangsu, and my grandfather went to register. My grandfather doesn't know how to read. He verbally said my name was Su, and later the staff changed my name to Su Nana because of the dialect. Now, as an adult, I sincerely thank the staff for giving me this name. Personally, I'm still Nanado, Sudo.

Actually, in the process of changing this name. I thought about changing my name, but my sister succeeded in getting my father to change her Su Tingting to Su Ting. No one in our family is an ink man. This name is to reflect this feature, and I also want to change the name and get rid of a word called Nasu. Dad replied to me again: "The process of changing your sister's name is very complicated. Your name is quite good, so we don't have to bother." Then I nodded knowingly.

? Among our three sisters, only my name is Suna Dieyin, and my two sisters' names are Su Ting and Su Su. My parents are becoming more and more proficient in the process of increasing their children. Look at the changes in the names of the three of us. My parents' Chinese level is also improving.

? /kloc-in the winter of 0/994, my eldest sister Tingting was born. Her arrival let us know our family's plans for next year. My parents feel compelled to have a third child because they are eager to have both children.

? In the 1990s in New China, family planning was implemented as a national policy. The first child in rural hukou is a girl, so she can have another child, and only one more child. If the second child is a girl, it is a double female ligation household. Enjoy some preferential policies of the state, such as double female ligation households in the senior high school entrance examination can enjoy 5 points more. If the first child is a boy, it can't be regenerated.

? With the arrival of Tingting, the number of places in our family is full. Parents still want to have another child, so we must find a way. At that time, family planning was very strict, and the family planning staff were secretive, and they did not catch suitable married women for ligation to prevent more children. There are still some village names in the village that can be held in real names, and those who are super-born or ready to be super-born will be greatly rewarded.

? In one place. It's a cold winter night and it's snowing. Grandma went out after dinner at night. Grandma has to go out. Dad planned ahead. When Grandma was chatting with her next-door neighbor, Dad broke into the house and said anxiously, "Mom, Xiao Lang is dying. Go home and have a look. "

? Grandma and dad hurried home, grandma took care of the mother who had just given birth, and dad and my uncle in the same village sent them to grandma's house overnight under the guise of taking me to the hospital. I heard it snowed heavily that night. From that day on, I went back and forth between my home and my grandmother's.

It spread the next day, and I was half dead. Subsequently, the family members reported the situation to the family planning department. I was also taken care of by my aunt who just graduated from junior high school.

? I grew up in my grandmother's house and was sensible since childhood. 1996 In May of the lunar calendar, my little sister mr.zhou was born. Parents' desire to have a son also fell through. If no action is taken, mother may be arrested for birth control operation. In order to avoid this risk, parents decided to take their newborn little sister to work in Nanjing. Later, I moved to Wuxi, Jiangsu, and stayed in Wuxi for more than four years.

? I left home at the age of one and went to my grandmother's house. I was three to seven years old and I hardly met my parents. Tingting is taken care of by her grandparents.

? In the process of growing up, I also learned about my family. First of all, I have a half sister. That elder sister is one year older than me. This happened before my parents met. Later, her mother and father's marriage failed, and her mother remarried to another village with her. My parents got married the year my sister was born, and I came over a year later. . Not long after my sister was born, she was sent to a barren family for adoption by her mother.

? Not long after his sister was sent to that family, his foster mother couldn't live a hard life and left by herself. So my sister was taken care of by her adoptive father and grandmother. After graduating from junior high school, I met my brother-in-law, so my sister got married before she was twenty. She had two daughters when we met her. Last year, she felt that she had no son and a daughter who had no face.

After this girl recognized us, we added WeChat. Two people haven't seen each other for more than 20 years, and suddenly they become relatives. This relationship is a bit strange, but we still have a polite chat. My sister said she came back to meet us, but she still felt a little embarrassed. I feel a little embarrassed that I didn't go with us to catch my parents and strive for more concern. I feel a little sorry for her from the bottom of my heart. We are the same father, and she has been wandering around since she was a child. Although we are in the rural areas of Guizhou, our three sisters have all received higher education, and my sister got married early after graduating from junior high school and had her own children. If I think I am like this, I will feel that my fate is unfair and I will really be unwilling. Maybe I will have such a mentality of hating my biological parents. I can't help it, it's just a problem left over from history, but fortunately it didn't happen to me.

At this time, I want to praise my mother. My mother is a person who worships my father very much. She is really a little woman. It's okay. I will enlighten my mother that you will have another daughter. My mother may be very upset, but the actual action proves that she still cares about my father's accidental birth of this daughter. When I bought a car at my sister's house, my parents also gave some money to support him. And this money was given by my mother herself. This year's Spring Festival, my sister and brother-in-law brought their children to our home to pay New Year's greetings. Like us, they all called their parents.

? Actually, my sister is nothing like any of us. He looks more like his mother. Now they have returned to their hometown and raised three children. Brother-in-law bought a car, and sometimes he can go soliciting on weekends. I always ask my mother to keep in touch with him and cultivate feelings, because what he lacks is the love of his family.

? I hope my sister and brother-in-law will live in harmony with Mei Mei forever, and I hope I can help them in the future.

? My sister was born in 1996. Shortly after her birth, her parents left Guizhou and went to work in Jiangsu. In this way, five people in my family are divided into three places: I live in my grandparents' house, Tingting is taken care of by my grandparents, and my parents take my sister to work in Jiangsu.

? I study at 1999. Then I will take 1999 as the deadline to record.

? Before 1999. I basically live at my grandmother's house. At that time, my aunt was not married, and basically my aunt was taking care of me. Aunt is basically a comfort in my heart and in my world. When I was a child, my aunt would send me to my grandmother's house for a few days. I cry my eyes out every time, because I feel insecure and it is a strange environment to go to my grandmother. Crying like that is something I will remember deeply in my life. It's really because my aunt left that I feel insecure. Because of me, my aunt travels frequently between grandma and grandma's house. Dad has six brothers here, and dad is the second. I have a fourth uncle who went out to work as a teenager. Later, because of me, my aunt contacted my fourth uncle. The end result was that they fell in love and finally got married regardless of grandma's opposition. At that time, Xiao Yan was the apple of my grandmother's eye. Xiao Yan was very beautiful when he was young. The fourth uncle is convenient in appearance and age, but there is still a gap with his aunt. Grandma thinks aunt should have something better than marrying into a relatively poor family like her mother. It was noisy. My grandfather wrote a letter thousands of miles away accusing my parents of letting my aunt stay with my fourth uncle. I was the one who suffered, and I sent it directly to my grandmother to live here.

? I can't help it. My aunt is persistent. After I got engaged to my fourth uncle, I followed him to work in Jiangsu. The next year, my fourth uncle and I came back for a wedding. Then, in this way, mom and aunt married dad and fourth uncle. Our relatives are exactly the same.

When I was a child, I felt the world was beautiful because of my aunt's care. My aunt left me after falling in love with her fourth uncle. I was very sensitive and insecure at that time. My grandmother's side, because of my aunt's reasons, is still a little left out by her grandmother. After all, my aunt is her favorite daughter, and my grandmother has a younger sister. As a sister, I shouldn't be coquettish.

The other is the secret of our family. Mom and dad went to work in Jiangsu and have been giving birth there. My little sister was born in May of the lunar calendar on 1996. Later, my parents went to Jiangsu and listened to my mother's later description. I actually have three sisters. 1February 1998,1February 1999, and in February 2000, my mother gave birth to three more daughters. Because we already have it at home, if the three of us take it home together, the financial burden will be heavy. My parents' goals are obvious. They want a boy. So when I was in Jiangsu, the child was sent away just after the full moon. I hope they have a good family and bring them up, instead of following us back to our hometown in Guizhou to suffer.

? So to be correct, my parents have seven daughters under their plan. I should be second. I am looking forward to my three sisters. Sometimes I ask myself, do they look like me? Do they look like their parents? They grew up in different environments. Are they as tall as us? Many, many questions, I hope I can recognize these sisters in the future, and also let my parents have a perfect explanation in their later years.

? 1999 went to preschool. My parents went back to Guizhou when I was in grade one. That is, during the 200 1 Spring Festival. I was in the first grade of primary school, the first half of the year. Suddenly my parents appeared, a little strange and a little distant.

They arrived in Guizhou a few days before the Spring Festival. Maybe because the train was late, they didn't get home until early morning. By the time we got home, my sister and I had fallen asleep and were awakened. My little sister is wearing brand-new clothes and handing us candy back and forth between her parents and the bed. Since which day, we have officially lived with our parents!

? When mom and dad come back, clean us up and put on beautiful clothes for us. At that time, I felt that I was the most beautiful boy in the village. Then we took our three sisters to visit relatives. The Spring Festival in our hometown will last until the Lantern Festival. That marks the end of the new year. After the Lantern Festival, my bad luck came. I was the only one who went to school at home, and my father began to check my winter vacation homework. I don't know anything. I set a time for my homework every day and my father will check it. What I hate most is that my father is watching me do my homework.

Looking back now, it may also be because after leaving for so many years, my father was doomed to have no son. So we can only train the three of us into talents. Even without a son, our daughter is excellent. Dad is a good-looking man, so he wants me to set an example.

Not long after my parents came back, I once listened to my parents settle accounts. I don't seem to have saved much money in recent years. Now I'm going to school, and so are my two sisters. So my parents decided that my mother would take care of the three of us at home and my father would go out to work. Not long after the Chinese New Year, my father and my fifth uncle went to Jiangsu. That is, in April of that year, my grandfather suddenly fell ill and died. Dad went home with his brothers to attend the funeral.

? I remember when grandpa died. But at that time, the death of my loved ones made my simple mind not feel great sadness. But I know that on the day my grandfather left, I cried. I feel sad and sad. A few days later, my father and my fourth uncle, fifth uncle and sixth uncle came back from other places. Go straight to the mourning hall when you come back, because grandpa has put it in the coffin. Later, at the request of all the brothers, Mr. Taoist chose a suitable day to open the coffin again. Because the four brothers want to see grandpa again. After reading the fourth uncle, he couldn't help feeling. Run straight to the yard and cry. At that time, my private parts were crying hysterically like children. Regret not being filial to grandpa for so many years.

? In my hometown, the funeral of the old man will last for about seven days. The banquet on the last day will be even bigger. When I was a child, there were basically no fish in the banquet in the countryside, but my father and six brothers wanted to make Grandpa's funeral decent, so they all spent more money on the menu. Grandpa left us at 200 1.

According to my grandfather's impression, I started at school. I went to school for the first time in my life. My grandfather gave me the name, gave me the scientific name, and sent me to the school. Every day at school, grandpa will prepare breakfast for me in advance. At that time, we used a coal-burning stove to cook at home. Grandpa cooked dinner for me in the morning and sat on the stool next to him and smoked a cigarette. Children had better get up early in the morning and go to school after breakfast. I will never forget this scene.

? I was beaten by my grandfather. I didn't know I had pocket money until I went to school, but the old man was very strict with his children and rarely gave me pocket money. So in preschool, I took grandpa's ten dollars. Ten dollars could buy a lot of things at that time. When my friends and I spent almost the same amount, grandpa found out and beat me up. Grandma protected me at that time: you can't hit the child if you spend it.

? Grandpa had a brief existence in my life, but it was also an important memory. When I was admitted to college, I was thinking, what kind of mood did Grandpa feel when he saw me go to college? In high school, I studied the Border Town written by Shen Congwen, which tells the life of Cui Cui and grandpa. There, I seemed to see the shadow of my grandfather and me. I always read it over and over again, and sometimes I cry. If only grandpa were there.

? To outsiders, I am an outgoing and lively girl. In fact, I am a sensitive, fragile and insecure girl at heart. People are a complex of contradictions, and what you may see on the outside is what you need.

? Shortly after grandpa left, September 200 1 year. My seven-year-old and five-year-old sisters have started school. They are classmates. I was in the second grade at that time. In the second grade, I was sick and asked for leave for nearly two months. I also thought that I would be demoted. Fortunately, the school allowed me to take the final exam smoothly and go to school at Caiwang's home.

The primary school where we were at that time was a rural primary school. Due to the educational reform, there are only students from preschool to grade two in the school at present. So I went to Leping Primary School when I was in the third grade, which belongs to the primary school in the town! I was afraid to go at that time. Because my Chinese is not good, I often fail, even pinyin, and I haven't learned it well until now. I went to Leping Primary School in the third grade, and my two sisters are still in the preschool and first grade of Fenghuang Primary School. Remind my little sister that her parents let her go to preschool for two years because she is young.

After grandpa died, my father didn't go out to work and took care of us at home with my mother. At that time, he found that my pinyin was not good, so he asked my first-grade sister to teach me pinyin every day and check it every night. It turns out that I have always been a poor student in Chinese learning.

? When I came to Leping Primary School, I was assigned to Class Two, Grade Three. The Chinese teacher is Tan, and the math teacher is Tan. I am especially afraid of the Chinese teacher, because she asks her classmates to dictate words every noon, and I can't fully face that. When I grew up, I doubted the IQ of China people at that time. On the contrary, I prefer a fat math teacher. Why? Because I'm better at math. Therefore, I am an excellent student in mathematics, and the contradiction of poor students in Chinese will focus on me. So far, I want to thank my math teacher in particular, because she gave me great confidence and let me know that I can do well.

In the fourth grade of primary school, the math teacher was replaced by our class teacher because the class teacher Mei was married and pregnant. I was very happy at that time, because I got good grades in math, my teacher liked me, and I liked my teacher. The Chinese teacher was replaced by a teacher Zhao who came to practice, and he was also very nice. My Chinese score can also be 60 to 70. But I am still an average student in my class, not a top student.

Teacher Tan, a fifth-grade primary school teacher, is still our head teacher, but the Chinese teacher was different last semester. Last semester, I was a Chinese teacher in Class 5 1. Next semester, I am my classmate and Xu Juan's uncle. At that time, math was still very good, and Chinese could get about 70 points. I'm afraid of Chinese exams every final exam. However, there are some changes in the fifth grade. At the end of the semester, my total score in the final exam actually squeezed into the top five and got the first certificate in my life. And it's the final grade. On that day, the principal awarded certificates to outstanding students in front of the whole school. At that time, I always thought that the class teacher was cheating and brought me up because my Chinese grades could not bear to look straight at. At that time, I was young and didn't think so much, but this time I got the certificate and my heart was full of honor and pride. I think just then, a voice in my heart told me that I could.

? In the sixth grade, our Chinese teacher was Miss Alina Zhang. The math teacher was replaced by the husband of the former math teacher, because he always complained that he was the worst student in every sixth grade. So Miss Tan gave us to her husband, Miss Zhu. The first time you came to the final exam, I got full marks. This has added to Mr. Zhu's attention to me. The sixth grade is the most glorious age of my primary school, not why, because I studied very well that year. I seldom got 80 points in Chinese before, but I can get 80 points. Mathematics has always been in my life without any problems. This laid the foundation for me to be admitted to the experimental class of a good middle school. So when I was in junior high school, I went directly to the best experimental class in Leping Middle School.

The above description is the process of my primary school. Let me describe the process of psychological change during my growing up. I was raised in my grandmother's house. At that time, I was safe in the world with menstruation's daily company.

? Later, because she was in love with her fourth uncle, Xiao Yan followed her to work in Jiangsu. Menstruation's sudden disappearance made me feel insecure about the world. No one will be with me 24 hours a day, and no one will listen to me every day. It seems that people are like this. It will show up when you are in a bad state. Then you will send a signal to others, and that person will have a legitimate reason to bully you. I feel very lost when my sister-in-law has left. I feel that someone is always bullying me, and it is the little boys who are several years older than me. Verbal ridicule, physical contempt. I found that I can still remember. Grandma has a brother, but my next-door neighbor always calls me by my nickname. In fact, I didn't understand the meaning of the nickname at that time, but I just thought it was an insult to me. My heart is unbalanced and I dare not resist.

In primary school, it may also be my sense of security that makes people feel that I am weak. The boys in my class bullied me and didn't respect what I said. Now it seems to be an objective analysis: I have no sense of security, so the feelings brought by things around me are also insecure.

? It was not until I was in the third grade that I arrived at Leping Primary School. My nose seemed to have a sore at that time. So there will be some pimples outside the nose. The math teacher wanted to test the ability of all of us to recite multiplication formulas, and singled out Wang Hehua and Zhang Can to test our recitation. When it was my turn, neither of them wanted to hear me recite the multiplication formula. They did this because my nose was very painful. I remember my own things long after I graduated from primary school, and some pains may only fade away with time. Not long after finishing junior high school, Wang Hehua seems to be married. Zhang Can and I were admitted to Anshun No.2 Middle School together. We just started coming home from school and going back to school together. We haven't known what kind of gap there is since senior three. Don't talk when you meet. So far, I'm curious about what part of me offended him.

? I was scared before I came to Leping Primary School again. Because at that time, I knew that my Chinese was not good, and I was an excellent person with excellent academic performance in the impression of my primary school classmates. When I was a student, how to know a person depends on his grades. I am afraid that my Chinese grades will be criticized by teachers and become the laughing stock of others.

? When I came to Class 2, Grade 3, I was not alone, because I was assigned to a class since I was a child. My little hairy man is very beautiful, especially that I was a person who was not very talkative at that time. When we came to this class, we felt very rustic. We really forgot how many points we got in the first Chinese exam, but we got 88 points in the math exam. Relatively speaking, it is still good.

? Basically, I didn't get below 80 in math. If I play better, I can get 90 points. Actually planted the seeds for my confidence. Because the math teacher especially appreciates me.

? When our fourth grade math teacher, Miss Tan became our head teacher directly. Once the whole class did a class test, and the topic was very difficult, and then no one in the class finished it. I am proud to be the first to hand in my homework and then go home for dinner with my schoolbag on my back. That kind of excitement can be felt now, which is actually your own little joy.

The math teacher always gives me a lot of encouragement, and I think it's very important there. My parents came back to take care of our study and life, and my father was completely concerned about my study. They don't care about my mental growth and psychological changes. Objectively speaking, it is not their problem now, but the times have created their educational methods. Because everyone is a product of the great era background. Some ideas and deep-rooted ideas are created by the times.

? The previous family growth environment caused my insecurity and inferiority. I found that I can still do it in terms of teacher Tan's constant encouragement of learning. At this time, self-confidence began to explode and continued to grow all the way. The fifth grade has strengthened my information with excellent students. So in the sixth grade, I was admitted to the experimental class.

? Because we are in the experimental class, although the school is opposite to the primary school. But we need self-study classes and cram schools at night. So I have to live on campus.

? I signed up to queue up for accommodation myself. There are many people. I queue up in the morning and handle it in the afternoon. Accommodation was very difficult at that time, and two people slept in the same bed. One person brings a quilt, one person's is not under it, and the other person's is covered on the surface. Surprisingly, Yang Yafei, who sleeps in the same bed, and my quilt cover are the same. My quilt is new, and then my mother said to leave my quilt under it.

? On the first day of school, my mother brought me luggage and left. I was impressed, too. The luggage was quilts and pillows. The pillow was stuffed with old clothes, so it was hard. After getting acquainted with my classmates, I found that their pillows were all soft. At that time, my dream was to have a soft pillow.

? That pillow stayed with me until the second day of junior high school, so I saved money to buy a pillow myself. His elder sister needs accommodation when she comes to the first grade. Mother bought him a beautiful pillow with money. I clearly remember that your material is beaded cotton. I asked my mother to buy me a pillow. At that time, I felt very happy to sleep at night.

In fact, our home is not far from the middle school, because of accommodation, we can't go in and out at will like day students. We 12 finish class at noon and have classes at 2: 30 in the afternoon. We have two and a half hours at noon. Sometimes I sneak home for dinner with my student ID card. Later, I was criticized by the class teacher in class. I gave up going home for dinner and stayed at school honestly.

Your head teacher is Peng Junhua and my first love is Peng Xianda. They are related. Teacher Peng is Peng Xianda's uncle. The relationship is amazing. In middle school, I think learning should be the same as primary school. I will study in primary school. Our classmates are all elites in primary schools. I found myself getting more than 30 in the first monthly exam. There are about 60 students in the class, and I have a top student in primary school who has become a middle school student among my classmates. I still have a big gap. But no matter how hard you try to catch up, your grades are still in the middle. Maybe I was in adolescence at that time, and a lot of psychological construction was not done well, so sometimes I couldn't learn.

It was in the second day of junior high school that I slowly became the top ten in my class. Slowly began to become an excellent student, and it took me a year to get this position.

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